this is now

Same As It Ever Was…
Well. Life’s the same, same as it’s been for a while and it’s getting old, but what do you when you’re stuck? Cripes, work is a bitch. Yesterday, we hired someone else. I think. With all the bullshit that floats there, I never know anything - but that’s okay - because when the shit hits the WaterWiggle, I…know…nuthin’! :smiley:
Me So Horney…
Not long ago, my hubby lost his job; the place he loved and sweated over and dedicated his life to for 12 yrs. went belly-up. I asked the CEO of my current employer to consider my hubby’s application. Now remember, this is the same guy who left his wife for a beautiful slut in my dept. seven yrs. ago(My personal name for her was PP, i.e. “Perfect Pussy” who, of course, is no longer in my department). I didn’t expect the same suck-off job she got - just look at his fucking qualifications, you jerk!
My boss was so against the idea, he was flinching - or is that how cocaine makes you act?! He said, “Well, I don’t think husband and wife teams work out.” After I recovered from my stroke, I wanted to scream, "Okay, so if I’m legally married, I’m fucked by a white hot, barbed-wired dildo?! But if I’m Cute Cunt, it’s perfect for the workplace! So you’re saying, ‘Concubine and Owner’ are fine?! ‘Whore and John’ are fine?! ‘Hooker and Trick’ are fine?!’ Maybe if you pulled your ass out of her ‘‘sexy’ ass, you might notice the shit in your Austin Powers hairpiece, you stingy Cock!’ :stuck_out_tongue:
It Ends Well, For now…
My hubby did find a good, wonderful job, away from the fucked-up place, I work, where old Jews in Siberia would hate to be. Then again, I’d prefer my hubby (or me) being a prostitute over working for the same company I do - the pay’s better, the clientele is better and the view is superior!
:wink:

. . .
. . .
. . . all the words are English.

Congratulations, that’s great news!

or

I feel your pain and deeply sympathise.

[sup]I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about, so could you just read one or the other of the above; whichever is most appropriate?[/sup]

Next week on FOX, “When Dictionaries Explode”

Umm … right on, dude?

I’ll try to translate, I speak Incoherent Ramble:

Ana is upset, because she asked her company’s CEO if he would consider hiring her husband. CEO balked, which is unfair considering the fact that he left his wife for another woman who works at the same company. This woman was pretty, but of questionable moral character, in Ana’s view. It all worked out in the end, though, because her husband found a better job somewhere else. Someday, Ana hopes to quit her job and become a prostitute.

One has to ask, Ana: If the company is that bad, why don’t you prostitute yourself?

Got it, Giraffe. But if she’s legally married, why is she being fucked by a white hot barbed-wire dildo? Sounds incredibly painful. Can you translate that into I.R. and get back to me please.

samarm, the dildo part is in a dialect of IR that I am not well acquainted with, but I’ll give it a shot:

Ana feels that the CEO’s refusal to consider her husband for the job is unjust on par with forcing her to undergo a painful sexual experience. Moreover, she has to endure this punishment only because she and her husband are married, which she finds ironic, considering the fact that the CEO and his current girlfriend are not legally married. She also feels that because the CEO is nicer to the woman he has sex with than her husband, he is a mean person with poor personal grooming habits.

I’m not sure I got it completely right, but that’s my best guess.

I’m almost afraid to ask for someone to draw this out for me.

Good job, Giraffe. I can actually understand it now. Thanks.

I think his head was supposed to be pulled out of her sexy ass. Either that, or her boss wears an Austin Powers hairpiece on his ass. :confused:

Giraffe, you rock large.

(Actually, I had pretty much figured it out, but it’s good to know I was on target.)

//
Because…I would be SOOO embarrassed when my hubby made SOOO much more money than me! :eek:

//
Yes, you are correct! Except I couldn’t be a whore - I’d get treated far to well and get spoiled.

//
Yes, you are right! Goodness! I didn’t think I sounded so confused! Maybe that’s what anger does to a person. :frowning:

//
:smack: Now why didn’t I think of that?! I guess my imagination had the putz(my boss) curled up inside her retcum!

Welcome to The Straight Dope, Ana. You appear to have a sense of humor at leat.

And I have a sense of humor about l33t.

That would explain the shit on it…