This just in from the WTF-department

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

OK, I walk into the men’s room a few minutes ago here at work. I am planning on using a urinal for its God given purpose, you see, having had a nice lunch with milk and coffee.

Upon entry, I spot a gentleman at the sink washing his hands. About my age, neatly dressed in a pinstripe suit, nice shirt and tie. Washing his hands, as you do, after using the facilities.

Perfectly normal stuff, right? Everyday plain vanilla off the rack bathroom conduct.

Well, no. You see, the gentleman in question had his fly unzipped, and his dick was hanging out. :eek:

Now, I’m a considerate person. I’ll tell someone when their shoelace is untied. I’ll let them know when their label is sticking out of their t-shirts, in the back of the neck. I tend to inform people of left-over food in their faces, and in the case of close friends, boogers up their noses.

But what in the hell do you tell a complete stranger who’s unaware his dick is hanging out?

I’ll tell you. You say, “Uhhh…”, whilst looking at the ceiling nervously.

Works like a charm. He tucked his trouser snake back in, zipped up, and said: “Huh, how weird. I must have forgotten to close up after I peed.”

How in the world do you not notice your dick hanging out of your pants? W.T.F.??

Anybody else have news from the WTF-department?

2

Novocaine and a blindfold?

3

Maybe it’s tougher to notice if one has a length problem? :smiley:

4

What?! NOOO! you should have let him find out the hard way!
(joke. He’d probably be arrested for flashing)
My WTF - My boss, an apparently neat and tidy man, puts his empty soft-drink bottles and other assorted bin-material in the cupboard

5

It always gets me how women can not tell that their tit is hanging out. Wouldn’t they (dick-dangle-man and bouncing-tit-woman) not feel a breeze?

6

I have one, but it’s so so TMI. I’ll keep it to myself.

If I’m being honest, when I’m away from home for any length of time, I’m always worried that my absent-minded-professor husband will leave the house with no trousers on. :slight_smile:

7

I’ve just checked my 2002 edition of Jjimm’s Guide to Etiquette, and it says you should fix the stranger in the eye, and say “My, but the orchids have flowered early this year.”

Clearly standards have changed, because my 1977 edition of the same book says you point to the man’s groin and say “Ha ha, I can see your willy”.

8

It was probably a pervert. Nobody, unless they’re very VERY drunk is gonna forget to put their dick back in their pants.

Jon

9

My thoughts too, nitro, but this is a guy who works 10 meters away from me, and seems fairly normal in most respects. Not your average raincoat-sporting dick flasher. Of course, my exposure to raincoat-sporting dick flashers has so far been fairly limited, thank God.

10

Maybe he accidentally pissed on his hands, so they were too wet to safely put his trouser snake away. He figured he’d wash his hands, dry them off, and then zip up. Then you walked in, and he realized what a terrible mistake he’d made, but it was too awkward to give you the long explanation.

But I think the pervert theory is more likely.

11

Just a warning, DON’T (because you’re home sick for the fourth day running and bored) ever EVER look up ‘flasher’ on Google images.

I was going to post a link to a funny picture, but now I just feel ill.

:slight_smile:

12

Mebbe instead of shaking the lizard, he wanted to air dry it.

:confused:

13

Oh, and on topic…

It’s odd you all think he’s a pervert. If you saw a woman who had accidentally tucked the back of her skirt into her pantyhose and her bum was showing, would you think she was a pervert and/or an exhibitionist.

Maybe he’s just dozy?

14

Perhaps this guy is just overly competitive and he was trying to lure you into a comparision of assets.

Later on you’d end up in the parking lot comparing your cars.

Poor guy doesn’t have a chance against you in the “who’s got the hotter girlfriend” contest, though.

15

Even though my car is one of the most unimpressive ones in our garage, I’d very much prefer a comparison of automobiles to a comparison of “assets”, as you put it. :eek:

16

A friend of mine wasn’t in the habit of wearing underwear and one day he forgot to zip up after using the toilet. He went to the store and noticed everyone around him would look down when they got near him. He assumed this was because they were in a bad mood–until he looked down too and realized epidemic depression was not the problem. Luckily no one called the police on him.

17

Speaking of poor men’s room behavior, at my previous place of employment there was a fellow who dropped trou when standing at the urinal. Dropped his pants all the way to the floor, ass hanging out for all to see.

Buddy, those boxers have a hole in them for a reason. Unzip your pants, pull your tallywhacker through the hole, pee in the general direction of the urinal cake, put your John Thomas back and zip up. You are not 4 years old.

18

Pinstripes providing camouflage for a pecker is not a good thing.

19

I’m surprised, Coldfire.

There seems to be a common belief on the board that you have nothing to be ashamed of in the asset department.

Or is that all fluff and hype to compensate for driving a Peugeot?

20

It’s sad when someone thinks their status is defined by the price of their car, or the size of their dick.

Real men know that status is measured by the attractiveness of their SO’s. :wink: