Allow me to whine a bit. I know how annoying that can be.
I have recently come out of a four year relationship…a relationship where I honestly believed she was the one I wanted to marry. Bought a ring and all…took me a year of scraping by to afford the damn thing. But in my mind it was worth every penny. Not three months after I asked her to marry me, she decided to end the relationship. A situation I agonized about for weeks…but have since come to accept. Though it kills me inside…I only desire her happiness…and if tat happininess does not have me in it…then so be it.
But, surprisnigly enough…this is not why I have come to then wise folks at the Straight Dope. Another peculiar, yet confusing incident has happened since I have been unlucky enough to have been dumped.
An old flame has since contacted me…not just an old flame…but THE old flame. The lover by which all others are measured…my first love. We have been having random yet amusing conversations for the past month. It’s like we never parted. After 8 years we are speaking to eachother like we never split up at all.
A little background on the young lady. I met her after traveling the country for a year. I decided that living in Philly was killing me./so I traveled…and ended up in Louisville, Kentucky. While I was there I met the single greatset woman I have ever met. For a year and a half…we had the most amazing relationship. But, the time soon came that I had to move back to Philly (family obligations) and she had to go to college. Pesky reality set in…and we had no choice but to split up. A situation that killed me insoide…though I attempted to be a strong individual about the whole thing.
Anyway…I figuratively died for a few long years after that…but eventually got over it.
Now she’s back in my life, Though I’m , still unsure about what capacity that is.I want to find out what chance we have of making another go at it…but I’m unsure how. This is why I have bothered to take up the time of you kind folks. Do I tell her that she is the single greatest influence in my life…that she is the lover by which all other lovers are measured…do I say that I still lover her unconditionally…and that I always will? Or do I accept the blessing that she is my friend…and that in that capacity I know she will always be in my life? Do I fuck up a friendship by suggesting more?
Well…I leave this rather whiney situation in your capable hands. Am I being an idiot by even tempting fate? or should I take the risk?
Either way…thank you for responding in advance.