I lost my first attempt at response in a board slowdown, so I’ll just start anew. I don’t hide the fact that I dislike children, that’s my personal preference, and I’m not forcing it upon you. Somebody called me the new “kids czar”, though I fail to see how that description is apt. Am I the kids’ Russian monarch, or do I hold a cabinet-level position in our executive department in charge of kids?
The reason I made that post about wedding receptions is because of a misunderstanding between one poster and a response to his post. In one post, it appeared that the reception was clearly being discussed. The person who responded seemed to be talking about the ceremony. I posted to perhaps clear it up, by showing that there’s a distinction between those two events.
If the bride and groom really intend the ENTIRE evening to be a family affair, they are welcome to do so. However, it has been a tacit understanding at the receptions I’ve personally attended that the kids leave sometime after the buffet dinner and before it gets very late.
Think of what goes on late night at alot of receptions. The drunken uncles are heatedly debating the local roadwork construction timetables, the drunken cousins are hooking each other up with friends of the opposite sex, the semi-sober folks are trying to enjoy the dance floor and the jazz ensemble…that’s hard to do if you have to keep looking around to make sure there are no kids listening or watching or running willy-nilly about on their fifth sugar high of the evening. It’s uncomfortable for the adults who have to worry about their language use and randy behaviour while kids are around. Adults shouldn’t have to curb their behaviour because one couple’s hyperactive kid is still running around peskering people at midnight.
So, from my personal experience, I figured that the polite thing to do was send the kids home before the adult portion of the evening. By all means include them earlier in the evening so they don’t feel left out, but there’s a time and place for children.
I suspect that part of the disagreement is age. I’m in my mid-20’s, I’ve been to the receptions for brides and grooms in their mid-20’s. The bride and groom invite their friends and throw a big expensive party designed as a celebration for people in their mid-20’s. Children tend to interfere somewhat with the things people my age like to do at parties. When the bride and groom are in their 40’s and already have children, nephews, nieces, etc., that couple might prefer a family-oriented reception. Whatever their age, the couple surely has the power to structure the reception as they will. Still, are they inviting the kids out of politeness or because some guests cannot attend without the kids, or do they really want the kids there?
