“I’m going to get my revenge on whoever said that” said Tom, smoldering.
“All those stories about smoking being bad for your health are bullshit,” Tom flared.
“And people who believe in second hand smoke are stupid,” Tom piped up.
“I knew I shouldn’t have had my operation at Plastik Surgeons ‘R’ Us,” Tom said, his face falling.
“I was surprised when I went there for lasik surgery,” said Tom, his eyeballs popping out.
“Those bullies on the beach made me eat sand!” said Tom, gritting his teeth.
“I don’t have time to be crucified!” Tom said crossly.
“I speak Esperanto like a native!” said Tom artificially.
“No, I don’t know if I prefer Michelangelo or Da Vinci”, Tom dodged artfully.
“I just love Gershwin, don’t you?” Tom said rhapsodically.
“Space is filled with a substance through which light must pass” said almost every physicist before Michelson and Morley, ethereally.
“I’m gonna take care of that bunny” said Glenn Close, boiling mad.
“That falling apple gave me an idea” said Sir Isaac Newton, with gravitas.
“I don’t think we can have sex,” Tom said limply.
“I’m not sure what would’ve happened if Anthony Weiner had been elected mayor of NYC,” Tom said dangerously.
“You shouldn’t make fun of people’s hair colour,” Tom said gingerly.
“I’d love to see you wearing that new babydoll, baby!” Tom intimated.
“I prefer Oliver Twist,” sai Tom, still artfully dodging.
“My allergies are keeping my creative endeavors to a minimum,” said Tom apollengetically.
“I’m interested only in galaxies undergoing exceptionally high rates of star formation!” astronomer Tom burst out.