Ok, color me slow. I just got the joke. Oblong is trashing the AVS, because he’s a WINGS fan. I SEE.
All I can say is, throwing Columbine up as a reason to dislike the Avs is…gross.
The “dirty, corrupt and filled with criminals” joke is one I use for every team I dislike and it’s severely tongue in cheek.
I WILL call it a low blow.
I root for the Leafs because my boss bought their Zamboni, and because the Hawks are out of it.
Red Wings Suck…and they’re fans are worse it seems.
Hey! Only some of the fans suck. Hell, I’m a Wings fan and I enjoyed your posts.
I’m dying for the Leafs to make it to the finals. That’s the series I’ve been dreaming about for years!
Some clowns on a Colorado radio station were on one of our radio stations in one of those cute promotions they do where they trash talk each other. They ripped into Detroit for it’s crime and murder and our radio hosts said “I seem to recall the bullets flying out there too”. Jar, if you do it for all other cities, that’s fine. But people from Colorado have brought up Detroit’s crime in the past in their trash talking. Maybe not here but life does extend beyond the SDMB.
You don’t have to debate the Hockeytown monniker with me, as I said before. I don’t like it either. Especially the fact that they trademarked it. I heard that Carolina has erected billboards that says “The Real Hockeytown”. Bit of history, their owner, Pete Karmanos, is from Detroit and he and Ilitch don’t get along at all.
I root for Detroit because I have my whole life. I was lucky enough to go to Olympia but barely remember it. If it’s not Detroit, I’d root for Montreal or Toronto.
Steve Yzerman is god.
Avs suck! I hope Forsberg gets another concussion. I hope Pierre Lacroix chokes on a donut.
Great list, Oblong.
Those Av fans sure have had to suffer for their success, like the Wings fans, eh?
The first fucking year they’re there they win the Cup.
For this very reason, I will be rooting feverishly against the Hurricanes.
“This is funner’n a tractor pull! What happens next?” should not be heard in any arena where the Stanley Cup finals are taking place.
Wings-Leafs. Original 6. It’s destiny.
A reporter arrives in a Denver neighborhood, to interview a teen-age boy who just saved a younger boy from an attacking Rottweiler, by sticking his hockey stick under the dog’s collar and twisting until the dog was choked to death.
“Congratulations,” the reporter says to the boy. “My headline tomorrow is going to read ‘Fast-thinking Avs fan saves boy’s life’”
“But I’m not an Avalanche fan,” the boy says.
“Oh,” says the reporter. “Well, how’s this? ‘Broncos fan rescues boy from snarling jaws of doom’?”
“Sorry,” says the boy, “but I’m not a Broncos fan, either. I’m visiting here from Detroit. I’m a die-hard Wings fan.”
The headline on the reporter’s story the next day: Cold-hearted little bastard from Detroit murders beloved family pet
This one’s kinda old
Patrick Roy died after living a full life. When he got to heaven, God was showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded Colorado Avalanche flag in the window.
“This house is yours for eternity, Patrick,” said God. “This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here.”
Patrick felt special, indeed, and walked up to his new house. On his way up to the porch, he noticed another house just around the corner.
It was a three-story mansion with a bright red and white sidewalk, a 50 foot tall flagpole flying an enormous Detroit Red Wings flag, and in every window was a Detroit Red Wings logo. In the front yard was a sign that said, “Welcome to Hockeytown.”
Patrick looked at God and said “God, I’m not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question. I won four Stanley Cups, three Conn Smythe trophies, more awards than I can remember and I have more wins than any goalie in the history of the NHL.”
God said, “So what is it you want to know, Patrick?”
“Well, why does Steve Yzerman have such a better house than I do?”
God chuckled and said, “Patrick, that is not Stevie Yzerman’s
house…I’ts MINE!!!”
Blues fan here. I get to play “Whom do I hate more, Avs or Wings?” Let’s see…
Wings
“Hockeytown” - you have got to be kidding me. Hockeytown? That’s like St. Louis calling itself BaseballLand. Where was “Hockeytown” from 1955 through 1997 when the Wings sucked ass and you couldn’t find a Wings fan anywhere along the Detroit River? Only after the Leafs, Habs, Rangers, Hawks and Bruins all fold can they be Hockeytown.
Brett Hull. Brendan Shanahan. Traitorous bastards. (No, I don’t need a history lesson in why they are no longer with the Blues).
Chris Chelios. Hated him as a Hawk, hate him as a Wing.
Avs
Spoiled brats. I’ve watched the Blues get eliminated every year of my life, including the last TWENTY THREE YEARS consecutively. And I have to sit there at the bar with a bunch of “Avalanche fans” who need icing explained to them.
Patrick “Hall of Famers in front of me my entire career” Roy. Overrated like no player has ever been before.
Hired guns. They’re the Yankees of the NHL at the deadline.
I hate the owner like he’s my owner’s brother-in-law.
I’ll be rooting for Yzerman to run into Roy, causing them to both suffer career ending injuries.
You people actually watch and pay attention to hockey? Ugh!
Thanks for your input Aristides! It really helped us along!
and Dooku…how is Doug Weight’s pelvis these days. I’d hate to think he was having to refrain from sexual activity with me…I mean…his wife.
j
So you’re throwing Columbine into the faces of all the Avs fans on this board because some radio DJ did it?
Are you really this fucking clueless?
Now wait just a dog-gone minute …
If the cleat or skate fits …
Are you insinuating there was a time when people in Detroit or Michigan didn’t care about the Red Wings?
That would be bullshit.
The Leafs and Habs, you can make an argument. But they tend to be very negative when times are tough.
You’ll get no argument from me that Boston is a good hockey town, or that Ranger fans aren’t dyed-in-the-wool. But hockey is not the top game in town in either city. In fact, it’s not in the top 3 in either city.
I loathe the Avs. And I’m not a Roy fan. But attributing his accomplishments to Hall of Famers in front of him is bullshit as well. Ever see a butterfly goalie? He more or less invented that!
In other words, lift one of those ass cheeks so we can hear you better.
Everyone poo-pooing Colorado’s hockey history should be ashamed for overlooking the mighty Colorado Rockies.
snicker
[sub]Trying now for the THIRD time to post this:[/sub]
Yes, my comments were over the top and incendiary - you get that way when you watch your team lose every single year of your life. Let me try and qualify them better:
I’m insinuating that I didn’t hear from Red Wings fans, in any capacity whatsoever, until the early nineties. I’m sure in Detroit they still cared about their team, but I just never heard from their fans like you do with other teams regardless of how well they’re doing. Leafs fans, for example - you can’t shut 'em up. 
Hockeytown - I stand by that. That is the most arrogant thing I’ve ever heard. I’ll bump you ahead of the US teams, but no way do you deserve that title over Montreal or Toronto. Poll random people that don’t know much about sports, and ask them what is baseball town, football town, hockey town - how many will say Detroit is hockeytown? Oh, and BTW - the way these things work is that the rest of the NHL public has to start calling you hockeytown - you can’t just “appoint” yourself hockeytown.
Roy is a great goalie, no question. But I grow tired of everyone going on and on how he’s The Greatest Goalie The World Has Ever Known. He lets in plenty of cheapies through that five hole that opens up when he butterflies, and he’s also a terrible puck-handler - he always leaves the net and gets burned. And you can’t argue that he hasn’t been on one of the best teams in the league every year of his career. He gets plenty of Hall-of-Fame defensive and offensive help. Excellent positional goalie, one of the best of our generation. But best EVER?? C’mon. That’s what I mean by overrated.
Unfortunately, now I have to leave and won’t be back online until Monday, so bear that in mind as you flame…
Get out of the sun and put your glasses on fuckface.
Jarbabyj made a reference to Detroit being a crime city and I pointed to a high profile crime incident in Denver. I’m not the one who brought up crime. But I’ll leave it at that. I guess it’s ok to be funny and joke about crime when it’s poor faceless black kids. When it’s rich suburban kids, then it’s a real tragedy to be kept off limits. Again, I’m not the one who introduced crime into it. Enough of that.
Regarding hockeytown, the official slogan is Hockeytown USA. No other US city can really compare generally speaking. Our youth programs, college teams, minor leagues, proximity to Windsor makes it a hockey hotbed. I’d say that southeast michigan is a hotbed of hockey and the Red Wings are just a part of that.
From the mid 80’s on(during my time being a fan), the Wings have had a very strong, passionate, loyal base of fans. Even before the 80s it was there but the pathetic teams kept them silent.
You can’t really compare any US city to a Canadian city in terms of hockey fandom. Hockey is on such a higher level up there.
The Avalanche are without a doubt my most hated NHL team. They are to the NHL what the Dallas Cowboys are to the NFL, the Yankees are to MLB, and several teams (Miami of Florida, Florida State, Notre Dame, Southern California) are to college sports.
LET’S GO, RED WINGS!!!
**
Thanks for the concern.
She said it’s filled with criminals. Kind of like how Dearborn is filled with assholes.
Even then, jarbabyj put a “:P” at the end of her post. Her comment was just some generic trash-talk in a jovial manner. And how do you respond? Do you:
A) Point out some funny bad shit about Chicago?
B) Point out some funny bad shit about Colorado?
No, you go straight for the jugular and drag out the most painful thing to happen in recent Colorado memory. Real funny.
I wasn’t trying to be funny. So if I had put a 
at the end of my comment, all would have been fine? Okay,
Either way I don’t give a shit.
Wings win 5-3, McCarty with the natural hat trick. 3 more to go before the bums from Denver out eliminated and then we can sweep the Leafs for the Cup.
Fark Hockeytown. It’s either Montreal because they’ve won the most cups or Toronto because that’s where the hall of fame is.
I know you weren’t trying to be funny, you were trying to be an asshole. I just thought I’d return the favor.
Congratulations on the win, but if you think the series is over then you’re delusional.
The only crime I’m currently focusing on is that you are allowed to live and breathe with that sort of power for self-justification.
Go Red Wings. And take Oblong with you.