False.
TNP has been arrested before.
False, I’ve never been taken in and read my Rights.
TNP has testified in court.
True. Only one time. As a character witness, which is very rare. The defense was alleging the plaintiff wasn’t credible and was exaggerating his injuries. I’m not sure how effective I was. (at least they didn’t give the plaintiff much of an award)
TNP accesses SDMB at work frequently.
False. I just recently downloaded Tapatalk, have used it a few times but certainly not frequently.
TNP still has an old style, non-flatscreen TV (that may or may not be in use).
Yes, but it’s going out, so it’s days are numbered.
The Next Poster has bailed someone out of jail.
True. My Dad, when I was 16.
TNP has a cow-orker who is a motormouth.
Since I’m now retired, that’s False. But it was certainly true while I was working.
TNP supervises other people at work.
False, but true. I’m a substitute teacher, so I always have anywhere from 18-30 kids I’m supervising, but absolutely not other employees 
.
TNP is having company this coming weekend.
False. At least, I hope it’s false.
TNP has traveled to a city at least 300 miles away in the last month.
False.
TNP has a supply of at least 5 different hot sauces.
False, only siracha, 1 Mexican and 1 Tabasco in my fridge currently.
TNP has 3 different beers in their fridge now.
True. Typically have 6 or more different beers.
TNP takes more than 5 pills a day.
False. Five is the magic number, though I do also have an arthritis gel.
The Next Poster served in the U.S. military for a time.
True. US Army for 3 years and Reserves after that.
The Next Poster is very tall for their height but not too heavy for their weight.
Ninja’ed!
False. I’m the perfect size for both my height and weight.
TNP owns a pickup or a truck.
True, never been without one in my life.
TNP has a riding lawn mower.
False. I don’t think I’ve even operated a riding mower in this lifetime.
TNP knows at least three words in russian.
Da. Tovarish, vodka, nyet.
The next poster knows at least three words in Turkish.
Istanbul? Ankara? Izmit?..Sorry, I got nothing.
Lightning has struck within a stone’s throw (we’re talking an underhanded throw at that) of the next poster.