Every time I don’t feel well, I ask my wife if she thinks it’s Ebola and ask “what if I don’t make it?”
So far it has never been Ebola. 
Surprise! It’s Lassa.
One thing I know for sure, it’s never lupus.
Wouldn’t you just die laughing if the last line of dialogue of the last episode is “It’s lupus”?
IANAD, but as I understand it, a diet high in chocolate will cure this.
I wish this were true - but I eat *way *too much chocolate and am still on potassium supplements.
Do you have the “You could have lupus” ads by you, too? I laugh a little bit to myself every time I see them here.
Too late–they already had an episode where it was, in fact, lupus.
I have most of the symptoms of lupus.
:eek:
It’s a simple blood test that your doctor can order if you think you have the symptoms- an ANA.
I just realized this was from the OP. Ok, you have to stop googling diseases.
Sequential post hilarity, Alice.
Well, my potassium level is now at 3.6 so the NP has ordered me to stop taking the high-potency potassium supplements for now; still on Calcium Citrate and Vitamin D and Milk Thistle for now.
It’s been something like 11 days or so since I cut alcohol completely out of my diet and thus far no withdrawal symptoms worthy of note. Huh. The dull pain that I was feeling from my liver below the ribcage on the right and the upper back on the right is pretty much gone as far as I can tell. I think I’m going to try to get my liver enzymes checked again in a few months to see what’s going on there.
(I gotta confess, the thing about me having symptoms of Lupus was a bit of a tongue-in-cheek joke; descriptions of the symptoms make it a point to say how most if not all of the symptoms of lupus are present in a number of other diseases, any of which are more likely to be the culprit than lupus.)
I’ve misdiagnosed myself a number of times.
Thought I had Crohn’s (it was really IBS. I just didn’t realize IBS could hurt that bad.)
Thought I had intestinal cancer (it was really IBS.)
Thought I had Meneire’s disease (it was really a eustachian tube dysfunction combined with silent migraines)
Thought I had Bipolar II (it was really major depressive disorder and dysthymia)
Thought I had narcolepsy (it was really just a bout of insomnia causing hypnogogic lapses.)
I imagine the internet must be the bane of every doctor’s existence.
Oh, okay. 
If you get a butterfly-shaped rash on your face, panic. Then it’s lupus.
I’m reminded of the thing we’d do when we were kids, where you’d tell someone that if their hand was bigger than their face, it meant they had (cancer/AIDS/etc.). Then, when then held it up to compare, you smooshed it into their nose and laughed.
Actually I do have rosacea, and if you squint you can kinda make yourself see a butterfy pattern…LUPUS!!! OHNOES!
I’ve just spent the last 2 months working in a Paediatric Emergency Department.:rolleyes:
On the one hand there are the the parents who bring their baby in after ONE vomit because they’ve Googled “baby vomit” and decided the kid has pyloric stenosis, and the parents with the kid who only eats potatoes and who is a bit pale and who think he has leukaemia (he just needed iron supplements…and a more varied diet).
One the other hand there are the parents who let their child walk around for 10 days with a Bell’s palsy (essentially a one sided facial weakness with an inability to close the eye) before seeking treatment because “we thought it was an allergy”, and the parents who let their daughter go to school for 4 days with an OBVIOUSLY broken arm (i.e. it bent in a way arms are not meant to bend) “because it didn’t hurt if she kept it really still, so we pinned her coat sleeve to her shoulder”.
The mind boggles.
I’m sure this is true! I could tell it was a struggle for the NP and the ER guys to keep from rolling their eyes when I told them I looked up my symptoms on the web.
Looking at symptoms is almost guaranteed to scare you. If you think about it, you could say, oh yeah, I have been tired (who isn’t), my hair does seem to be falling out (happens naturally), my skin is dry (who’s isn’t?), I do have a hard time losing weight (who doesn’t?), and I do seem to be chilly a lot (it’s only spring)… I must have a thyroid problem! Except, I don’t.
Actually, the internet did help me several times.
Once a dermatologist misdiagnosed my problem - I noticed that when I went on the internet, it was almost certain that what she diagnosed was not true - first of all, the disease struck African American men to the tune of over 95% (and I am not African American) and pictures of it did not look at all like what I had.
So I went to another dermatologist and, sure enough, the first had misdiagnosed it. When I went back onto the internet to verify his findings, all of the photos looked exactly like what I had - and the statistical data matched me in almost every respect.
Several more examples of the internet helping me in medical cases, but perhaps that is for another thread.