I’ve heard he expressed doubts about going to heaven. I thought he would expect to march into heaven, walk up to Jesus, and say “You’re in my throne”
You’ve got to (claim to) be a martyr before you can claim to be the next Christ.
Well, he had a shot* at that about a year ago, but he moved.
*Phrasing.
I can’t be sure… but if he does we might have to add into the English lexicon the phrase,
“Hellish Ka-Boom”
Are you kidding? NOBODY has ever suffered more than him. He has lived the last 60 years of his life with untreated BONE SPURS! That kept him from fighting in Vietnam but he waged an even more courageous war against venereal disease! Then he had to suffer from the indignities of several unfair bankruptcies! Then when he took his rightful place as the head of the American Empire, there were people who opposed him! Not only that, when he tried to make an honest deal with Ukraine for phony dirt on his opponent in exchange for military support, he was unfairly impeached! Then he was unfairly denied a second term because people didn’t vote for him, he tried to rectify the situation by siccing a group of patriot tourists into the Capitol and was impeached for that! Can you imagine? Being crucified was a piece of cake for Jesus, certainly his pain and suffering was nothing compared to the hardships that Donald has overcome.
I mean, Jesus got to go to heaven.
Hypothetically, he was from there, so it was just a matter of going home. 
Yeah but look at what he had to go through to get there. The entrance bar was pretty damn high.
You know, Jesus descended into hell, before he ascended into heaven. I think Trump can make it halfway (metaphorically speaking, since heaven and hell are both imaginary).
Which would be … purgatory, or limbo. Which would be quite satisfying, to imagine him suspended in a quasi-afterlife, able to do nothing except observe. To him, that alone would constitute hell.
No, no. Hell was the halfway point on Jesus’ fanciful journey to Heaven. It’s in the Bible!
(Ok, maybe it’s not so explicit)
He complained very little.
< Pictures a fat narcissistic orange old man with cankles in a suit with a stupidly long red tie trying to bend backwards and ‘go as low as he can go’ under a bamboo rod for all eternity >
I owe you a much better quote; one from him. This is his interview on CNN yesterday re: the “No Kings” rally in Chicago. That John Cusack.
Great! Thanks!
That’s a pretty high bar.
When el donald bites the big one, you will want to fly your flag above full staff. Be prepared. Order your flagpole extender today.
I don’t think he uses toilets anymore (instead, there’s a hole in the seat of this jet):
(The 21-second video is embedded in that post. I didn’t want to link to it directly.)
That the President of the United States would post a video like that is disgusting. (Yes, I looked).
But thanks for posting the link. I will say that I quite enjoyed the comments.
Yes, there are a good number of witty (and sane) people over at Bluesky.
I’m reading that all or most of the major news outlets are protecting Trump by declining to mention anything about the video other than the crown. About the more disgusting aspects, they are silent.
(I hope he appreciates their protection. But he probably takes it for granted.)