Seen it meself, did I! There she were, lying on lawn like that taking in afternoon sun in 'er altogether the way she does, when this bloody great 'orse come charging out of 'edgerow yonder. Runs right up to 'er he does, bends down and bites into her thigh while she sleepin there. Just the one bite, see, then 'e gallops off and leaps over the fence and into Mr. Grey’s corn field. Damnedest thing you ever saw. Well I barely made it over to me wife to ligate the flow 'fore she drained right there!
No sense? 'Tis plain as day ye Maple Leaf Bint! T’were nought less than a great 'orse, 21 hand at shoulder if 'e were an inch! Ye see the blood on grass, no? Drew it 'imself with a single bite! I swear!
If any horse did something like that around me it’s owner could have expectedd to have his head swiftly severed from his body, and his ranch looted and burned! Anyone who cannot do something as simple as keeping control of an animal deserves such a fate. Unless it was a demon horse, in which case it must be slain and its foul corpse burned and the ashes spread to the four corners of the earth.
Flued chicken, aye. Not had chickens on this platte comin on 40 years now…weeeeeeet a minute! Just what are you insinuatin w’that “get rid of 'er” crack? You sayin’ I made oop that bit about th’orse?
Now look all you lot, now it’s true thot me & the missus 'ave 'ad our diffrences in past, and that I 'ave been known to indulge me cups from time-t-time–but I’ll 'ave out anyone calls me untruthful! Oath to 'eavn t’were nought but an 'uge bloody great 'orse done that to 'er. “Ether Frolicks” and “Benders” my arse! "Woman! Drag flabby over’ere and shew these folks what that 'orse done t’ye. Go on, show 'em!
See thot? Them’s teeth marks them is. 'orse teeth. Fix your eye, lad, don’t be strayin into the unbit lands or I’ll fetch out your eyeballs.
