Uh, what the hell do I do now?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Okay, I swore I wasn’t going to post this, but my nerves are starting to go and I gotta have some answers, so I’m turning to you folks for some advice.

Been seeing this gal for about two months or so, she flaked out on my almost a week ago and I had a rough bit, but had pledged myself to move on and was attempting to do so. Then I get a call at work from her mother. Apparently, the gal’s disappeared and her parents have neither seen nor heard from her in two days. This is not normal for her, and its the first time anyone’s mother has ever called me looking for someone! I tell her that I haven’t seen or heard from her daughter in almost a week. Her mother then says she’s at the gal’s regular hang-out looking for her and she isn’t there. She then asks me if I know person ‘X.’ I tell her almost everything I know about person ‘X,’ which is next to nothing (I’ve seen person ‘X,’ know what they look like, and one of the jobs person ‘X’ does.), then she asks me about person ‘Y’. Person 'Y’s name is rather enigmatic and could, in fact, be the name of a club in town (I get home and do a search on the net for clubs in the area with that name and get nothing.), or a nickname for someone.

What I didn’t tell her mother (and perhaps I was wrong for this, but I was really too stunned at all of this to be thinking clearly and thought that it was best not to say this) is that person 'X’s other job was working at a bondage club in town. Person 'X’s job there was tying people up and beating the hell out of them.

You can see where this is going, can’t you? I have a really healthy streak of paranoia and my first thought is that this gal is going to be found dead with her throat slashed in a dumpster somewhere.

WTF do I do? I mean, shit, her mother’s obviously worried about the whole matter, enough to call me (and we’d only spoken once before, and then only briefly), and her mother’s got good instincts.

I tried paging the gal (knowing that the odds were she wouldn’t call me back, which she didn’t). So how do I put this all out of my mind? Its gnawing at me like you wouldn’t believe. My life has become seriously unfun of late and this was the last thing I needed. Anybody have any experience like this? (I know of one person who did, and the gal was found in an alley with her throat cut.)

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

2

This morning I got a call on my cell phone (which is bizarre because the gal I was seeing is about the only human on the planet who has the number) from a guy looking for a woman named “Joan” (which is not her name), and when I told him he had the wrong number he asked, “Is this #XXX-XXX-XXXX?” I said, yes, but she couldn’t be here because it was my cell phone. I thought that she might have thought it was funny to give out my number to some guy, telling him that it was her number when this first happened. Then her mother called stating that she was missing and I began to wonder. So am I overly paranoid, or should I be worried at this point?

3

It is fairly obvious that you need to call the girl’s mother and tell her about “X’s” other job. If what you are saying is true there is really nothing else you can do, but if you don’t do that it will most likely come back to haunt you.

4

So there is more that you know? That phone call can be traced, so you need to start sharing your information with the mother and then the cops.

5

What they said. Tell her what you know. Probably the last thing you need if this turns into something tragic is to have had the appearance of hiding information.

And good luck and best wishes on it not turning tragic.

6

I agree that you should tell her mother anything/everything you know. Hope it turns out that the young woman just decided to visit an out of town friend for a few days… Let us know how it turns out? If you find out.

7

Dude, be as helpful as you can. Last thing you want if she does turn up in a dumpster is people saying…“You know, she broke up with Tuckerfan last week…I wonder…”

8

I gotta agree with everyone else! Call her mother and spill ALL! And then do the same with the police…

Sucks, but if you can (chances are that she’s off having fun, but why risk it?) help, then you are more or less morally obligated to do so.

If she turns up fine, and nothing nefarious happened to her, then she’ll be pissed… but so what? You already broke up. Hopefully she will realize that you were trying to help her…

Good luck, and let us know what happens!

9

Call the police. Now. Better safe than sorry.

Let us know how it all turns out.

10

These two statements seem contradictory. You know next to nothing about ‘person x’, but know their seedy profession and their place of business which seems like something someone wouldn’t share with a casual aquaintence. How do you know this about ‘person x’?

11

What I’m wondering is why it necessarily follows that because Person X is into B&D that they are obviously a murdering ratbastard…

If I like to play football and the Steelers lose, then obviously it was my fault, because I like to play football.

If I like to do white-hat hacking and the local phone company’s computers have suddenly shut down, then it was obviously my fault.

The last time I looked, BDSM folks didn’t kill each other in their playing. I have some <b>very</b> good friends who are into that scene, and you couldn’t find sweeter guys.

jayjay

12

jayjay is right – the bondage scene pretty much exotic play, not actual menace. That said, it could very well be that she is, in fact, there, tied up and loving every minute of it. You never know. And if she isn’t there, at least it would be easier for her mom/authorities to track down Mr. X and ask if he’s seen her lately. There’s really nothing to lose by telling what you know.

13

Okay, I called her mother and left her a message stating that I thought of a few things about ‘X’ which might help her find him if she was still looking. Left the phone numbers where I can be reached at if she needed to talk to me and haven’t heard anything, so far, which is probably good news.

Now for the clarifications. I only know 'X’s first name (and its a name that can either be long or short, so his real name might be slightly different), and I only know the type of places he works at, not their names or their locations. And I know that just because he’s into BDSM doesn’t make him a serial killer (but many of them have been). All I know about him is what she told me, I haven’t done anything to try and ferret this information out on my own. She volunteered it, and I’ve got a good memory so I retained it.

The two things that really set me off about this were the fact that her mom was looking for her, and the fact that every girlfriend who’s ever split up with me has wound up with (in their words) a sick SOB who was worse to them than I ever thought about being. (Not that I ever deliberately planned to be bad to any of my girlfriends, but that’s another story.) So naturally, the paranoid section of my mind takes over (especially after a buddy of mine says he met a guy who matched the description of ‘X’ and he was one twisted fuck), and I get to worrying when her mother calls me and says she’s disappeared.

If this had turned out to be a worst case scenerio (and it doesn’t look like it, I checked the paper this morning and didn’t see a mention of a homocide, or “Jane Doe” turning up anywhere), the cops’d have no trouble clearing me (I’ve spend much of my time either at work, school, or on the web when I wasn’t asleep), and one of the guys I work with (who’s been out sick, so I couldn’t talk to him) has spent a number of years as a cop, private detective, and working in Covert Ops, so I’d get him to help me out with the situation. After all, missing persons aren’t high on the police priority lists (not bashing cops, but I know how the system works, and they don’t have time to handle everything that comes their way).

In any case, I hope she’s found her soul mate.

14

good grief, i just read an article in last month’s vanity fair i believe, about a guy who killed people he had lured into bdsm. i agree with everyone that said tell all you know to her mom and the police. if her mom doesn’t file for a missing person, please do so. better be safe than say: “i could have, i should have.” if it turns out to be nothing, at the very least you showed you cared.

15

Just got a call from her mother and she said that the gal made it home safe and sound. What a relief! Thanks, all for the advice.

16

That’s great she is back but I would still give her a spanking.

17

Surely person X would be better qualified to do that…

18

aren’t you glad you didn’t tell the mom now? that would make for some pretty awkward questions for your pal, as well as perhaps an uncomfortable situation between the two of you.

i don’t really see how it didn’t occur to anyone that this might be a simple case of a mom overreacting. without more information from Tuckerfan about the mom and her relationship with her daughter, seems like that would be right at the top of my list of possibilities… i know i have ‘disappeared’ for 2-3 days at a time before and i’m glad my mom didn’t spend that time snooping into my personal affairs and calling all my friends to ask them invasive questions about my life.

just my two cents, and let me say i’m in a grumpy mood, so maybe i’m just on the wrong track.