It’s time for another “Unexpectedly” thread 
So what’s the last thing you said that was unexpectedly amusing to others?
Today someone was complaining about how very Monday-esque today is, and without thinking I blurted out “This is the worst Monday since last Monday!” Several people cracked up. Who knew that’d strike funny bones?
Share, please.
My GF likes to kid me about the amount of loose change that I leave scattered around. (I don’t know why – I thought all Canadians routinely emptied their pockets of $20 worth of change every time they come home.)
The other day she said, “I’m going to get you a coin bank for your birthday.” Then she added (for some reason that isn’t entirely clear to me, now,) “You know, you can get them made in the shape of their owner’s penis.”
Sez I: “But then I could only use it for dimes.”
She did an actual spit-take. All over the sofa. Thank god it was only water.
I still don’t think it was that funny, but she couldn’t breathe for a while. 
I was telling some friends about a chick I had as a pet (chick, as in baby chicken), and how it had been really cute but that it never grew up to be a big chicken.
Friend: So it died?
Me: Well… reflective it didn’t die per se…
Friend: :eek:
My friends thought this was hilarious. What I was trying to say was that it had disappeared but we suspected it’d been eaten by a stray cat. It came out kinda weird.
Years ago I was flirting with my soon-to-be girlfriend (oh for a time machine! run away, young man! but anyway…), and she was saying something about some male behavior being genetic, and I came out with
“Why are men the way they are? It must be something in their genes.” [jeans, duh]
She busted a gut laughing. I said “it wasn’t that damn funny.” She said, “yes it was.”
Send me your Toonies, I’ll put them in my bank. 
One night my GF and I were watching TV in bed and she brought me a small bowl of jello. I set it on my stomach and started making slurping noises. She looked at me (you know, that look) and I said “if I keep sucking at it, eventually it’ll come into my mouth.”
I had just gotten the words out when I realized what I’d said. :smack:
Heh. This reminds me of something I said the other day - we were playing drinking games at a friend’s house - I was the only girl, with three guys, and all of us were fairly drunk - and one of the guys was drinking as a penalty. I was supposed to tell him when to stop. I could see his Adam’s apple wasn’t moving, so I admonished him: “It doesn’t count unless you swallow!”
The guys, of course, agreed with much enthusiasm.
At lunch today, discussing food likes and dislikes with two co-workers:
Co-Worker 1: I don’t like it when my food’s all mixed up. I like it in seperate piles. I’m strictly segregationist when it comes to my food.
Co-Worker 2: So, if you had rice and beans, you’d have one pile of beans, and one pile of rice?
Me: Of course. Didn’t you just hear him? He’s clearly a ricist.
The other day with friends, stopping at a convenience store:
“It’s a good thing I quit smoking, 'cause I’m out of cigarettes.”
I said this with the utmost seriousness. Giggles ensued.
On the way to a concert I found out about an hour before:
“See I can be spontaneous if given enough notice.”
Talking to a friend about poker:
“I suck at poker. I bluff too predictably.”