Weird things you say when you're fully awake.

Inspired by the “things you say when you’re not fully awake” thread over here, I’ve decided to share something silly I said last night when I meant to say something completely different. I was fully awake, and had just gotten home from work.

Acid Lamp was sitting at the kitchen table, and I noticed a bag of Cheetos cheese poofs (referred to as “poofs”) sitting there. I meant to say, “Have you opened up that bag of poofs yet?” but what came out was “Are the poofs awake?” :smack: I was reminded of my little verbal blunder this morning when he actually decided to open the bag: “I’m going to wake up the poofs now.” :: picks up bag and looks at it while opening it :: “Wake up, poofs!” I’m normally pretty silly about these things, so I ended up laughing for a good five minutes about the whole “waking up the poofs” scenario.

I also refer to turning on the fish tank light as “turning on the fish” on a quite regular basis.

Anyone else have a silly or weird thing you’ve said while fully awake and trying to make your way through a sentence?

God, yes, but I can’t think of any at the moment. Yours made me smile rather largely, though. :slight_smile:

Its my round …oh shit er um I’m just going to the toilet,I’ll be right back.honest!

My husband pulled this last night. I’d left my purse in the apartment when we went out, so he had to open the passenger door for me when we got in his truck.

“I don’t leave the truck unlocked.”
“I know, but I left my purse upstairs and that’s where I keep my key.”
“Well, good to know that if you ever get mugged we’ll only be out a tree.”

He tends to mix up words quite often, but how he got from ‘car’ to ‘tree’ I’ll never know.

Jayn_Newell, I regularly forget the word “microwave,” and have recently used “microwaving” when trying to describe what a microwave does and can’t remember what it’s called. No, I’m not a speaker of English as a second/foreign language; I just suck.

My husband finds me an endless source of amusement because of the weird things I say unconsciously.

I posted this in some other thread, but anyways.

We were sitting on the couch snuggling, and he looked down at me and said, ‘‘I love you.’’

To which I replied. ‘‘Like an armadillo? With hair, though.’’

And when he looked at me with honest utter confusion, I tried to explain, ‘‘You know, like a regular armadillo… except if those had hair.’’

All I have to say in my defense is that I had some sort of mental image going that led this response to make complete and perfect sense in my mind.

My husband says I am one of those people who is unintentionally funny. At my wedding, he announced it was more important to have someone in your life you could laugh AT than laugh with… preceding the natural conclusion that he was set for a lifetime of laughter as long as we were together.

‘‘Are the poofs awake?’’ makes me ROTFL. I adore unabashed silliness.

We’ve got that in common, then. I unintentionally say weird things, but I do mean well. I think most of my friends appreciate my unintentional silliness. :slight_smile: