Unformatted Fortune Cookies?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I was talking online with a friend just now, who told me that she ate at a Chinese restaurant this evening and got the worst fortune ever in her fortune cookie. She said she kept it – and swears to me that this was the text:

"Fortune Not Found: Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

So, are the writers of fortune cookies seriously running out of ideas, or is Bill Gates importing illegal overseas labor now?

Anybody else get a weird fortune cookie message they’d like to share?

Or any messages that you think should BE on a fortune?

2

Oh my gosh. That’s one of the best cookie fortunes ever!

3

My favorite fortune was shown on a “Rocko’s Modern Life.” Filburt kept getting the fortune: Bad luck and misfortunre will infest your pathetic little life for all eternity.
I’d love to get that.

4

“Fortune Not Found: Abort, Retry, Ignore?”…in bed.

Hmmm. Nope. Doesn’t work.

5

I keep hoping to get the Alan King classic: Help, I’m a prisoner in a Chinese bakery!

6

“Nothing interesting or worth mentioning will happen to you. Ever.”

7

I got one that says “You are the greatest person in the world”. I still have it, in case I need to prove that I am indeed the greatest person in the world.

8

From fortune cookies we got at the local chinese buffet here in Elko, NV, last night:

Mine: “Salary go increase hope springs eternally today”

Wife’s: “Friends of family’s do righteous upwellings soon”

The cookies are the best I’ve ever had (made ‘in house’) but the fortunes sound like junk from a random phrase generator - none of them ever make any sense at all. We’re kinda used to it, but it’s a real scream to watch tourists open their fortune cookies at this place - some of the most precious bewildered looks you’ll ever see!

Lucy

9

This wasn’t me, but I did actually see it. My sister got the following fortune:

“Try another fortune cookie.”

10

Taped to my monitor right now:
Promote literacy. Buy a box of fortune cookies today.

11

“That wasn’t really chicken.”

12

“You have unusual equipment for success, use it properly.”

A real fortune cookie, which I keep in my wallet :smiley:

13

The best one I ever got was “Alas! The onion you are eating is someone else’s water lily.” I wish I’d saved it.

14

Heh. My friend Ed got the “Fortune Not Found: Abort, Retry, Ignore?” one at lunch about a week and a half ago. We thought it was pretty funny.

15

“Life is what happens, while you’re busy making other plans”. Fortune cookie that quotes John Lennon :slight_smile: Have it my wallet, still.

16

The strangest fortune I ever got from a cookie was none at all. I got an empty cookie. I don’t know what it means, but I don’t think it meant something good.

17

I gave a list of these quite a while ago. My suggestoions:

**Inspected by Numer 43

You will be…(Cont’d on next cookie)

Silica Gel … Do not eat

You have just pulled the pin on an organic grenade

Ingredients: Flour, sugar, corn starch, vanillin BHT to preserve freshness

Earn Big Money in Fortune Cookie Writing!

Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law

Good Morning Mr. Phelps…

AT&T 42.2…GSM 35.8…IBM 5.0…

Hershey’s Hershey’s Hershey’s

Smert Shpionem, Mr. Bond

**

18

I got an awesome one once:

True love awaits you.
Far East Fortune Cookie Co. (416) 555-1234
… I was *so *tempted to call.

19

I swear that I win the weird fortune prize. I got this one as a child, and it hung on our refrigerator for years…

Only you know the true whereabouts of Yma Sumac.

Of course, being a child I was :confused: :confused: .

Even now, as an adult, I’m still rather :confused: to think about it.

20

I have had two that just annoyed the hell out of me. (Both dutifully reported in that weeks’ MMP)

“Ignore previous fortune.”

  • and -
    “Imagine what you will be remembering in ten years.”

Are hallucionegic chemicals used in fortune cookie factories?