As the weather changes I have been taking stock of the pantry to see things forgotten over the summer months, to see if there is anything I should try to plan to use in the near future.
Among my canned good I have 6 cans of pinto beans. And I have no idea why. I don’t use many pinto beans, and when I do I used dried ones. I mostly keep canned beans around for no effort soups and stews, and I just don’t use Pinto beans in those for whatever reason. I have no memory of buying pinto beans, and no idea what I would have planned on using them for. The more interesting thing is that it is actually two sets of three cans of unexplained pintos, from different brands carried by different stores.
I guess I have attracted the attention of the Canned Pinto Bean Fairy somehow.
I know! Right! I have an extra large can of pork’n’ beans, we ain’t eating no stinkin’ pork’n’beans. Do not know whereof they appeared, but here they are!
The obvious answer is that people sneak into your house during the night and leave stuff–food, magazines, clothes, electronics, kittens. No other explanation. They also leave stuff in the back seat of your car. How else does that all that crap get there?
Idk, aliens usually just steal stuff from me…oh! Wait maybe they were trading. I learned from Star Trek there is no money, so bartering must be wide spread in the outer dimensions. Just what I wanted a extra large can of Pork’n’Beans for my t.v. remote or my unfertilized eggs. Even trade? Hmm!
My cupboard has: a can of poppyseed filling. A box of wild rice. Cans of plain tomato sauce. A bottle of no-name ketchup, a box of Carnation Instant Breakfast, a rusted tiny can of jalapenos. All of this is older than my CAT. I can only surmise I stocked up for winter emergencies or planned to make that wild-rice-jalapeno recipe that looked so interesting on allrecipes.com in 1999.
My mystery is the disappearing knives. I bought a set of silverware many years back with the normal number of place settings. Still have all the forks. All of the tablespoons. Most of the teaspoons. But the knives have vanished. And I’m the only one using them. I might have absent-mindedly tossed one or two of them in the trash, but that should at least leave five or six of them, shouldn’t it? But they’re gone, alas.
I keep coming up with spoons that don’t match my plain Jane silver wear. At the moment there a Revere-ish looking one and a fancy smantzhy round bowl spoon with an engraved ’ B’ on it in the dishwasher, I have no clue where they come from. Like a previous poster I have only one table knife. It’s all like the mysterious sock goblin who eats only one sock in the laundry. I have taken to buying all one kind of sock, so at least there is a pairing somehow. So the mystery deepens…cue ‘Twilight Zone’ music!
We are down to one fork of the many that we used to use. We have other forks, but the tines are thick and don’t pierce things very well, so we used the same forks with sharper tines over and over, and now, there’s only one. Where did the other ones go? And what happened to all of the iced tea spoons?
I found four onions in the refrigerator the other day, three of which had gone bad. I rarely ever buy more than one onion at a time. WTH?
I’d been living in my house for five years when I found a box of cake mix left by the previous owner… How come I’d never noticed it before?
I have a similar mystery. A couple years ago, I was out of town for several weeks. Got back and a month or two later, had a little dinner party. Threw open a cupboard to grab 6 water goblets for table settings and… no goblets.
Now, I started with 16 of these goblets and they’re not expensive, irreplaceable crystal or anything. They’re just the goblets I use for regular dinner parties, and I still have 10 of them. But where did they go? Who would have taken them? If I moved them to some unknown, illogical place, why can’t I remember doing that? And if I did move them, why haven’t I found them? There just aren’t that many places in my kitchen where I store water goblets!
I had a house sitter while I was out of town. Nice lady, no reason to suspect she would steal silly things like water goblets. No way I’m accusing her of it, that’s sure.
Just weird. It still bugs me. There’s a hole where my goblets should be!
A favored paring knife went missing sometime in the past year, but I’d almost bet it’s in my compost heap, inadvertently tossed when I was coring and skinning tomatoes to can. I’m not really up for a dig around the compost heap, but my little knife may yet turn up when I move the compost into the garden. I do miss it.
