I’ll be 27 in a few days and I’m still a virgin. I haven’t even had a girlfriend. For the longest time I’ve felt slightly ashamed of this and didn’t tell anyone, avoiding the subject when it came up. I’ve felt less than attractive and worried whether I had some personality trait that made me so annoying no one was interested in me.
One of the big burdens of being my age (or, judging from some of the posts in the other threads, younger) is feeling like there is something wrong with you for being a virgin. You don’t feel like talking about it and it seems like everyone else, attractive or not so attractive (to you anyway) has had sex.
More recently I’ve realized that this is wrong. There are more people out there who have not had sex than you think. It’s OK to talk about being a virgin, it helps other virgins realize they are not so wierd or unattractive, and it normalizes it for the non-virgins. I see this as something akin to being out and gay (although I think it is also quite different in many ways).
I don’t know how common it is to remain a virgin as late as I have (or even later), but I know that it doesn’t help much to be quiet about it.
I have a feeling that this might be like the thread asking about heterosexuals having homosexual encounters, where a lot of the responses were something like “Straight guy here, nope, never had one, not interested.” And a lot of virgins remaining quiet out of fear or shame or something. I welcome responses from all people, virgin or non, but I would hope that all of the posts are respectful and don’t make virgins feel bad about themselves.
I don’t see virginity as this great thing, I would actually love to have sex with a willing person, but it’s not something to be ashamed of and I would submit that is it should not be an immediate turn-off for other people.
Please chime in if you are virgin or know someone who is and tell us about your experience. If you have personal reasons for remaining a virgin, tell us.