Something like this ;)?
“Seven days…”
Sending back a golden plate of their own, with detailed nudes of their species on one side, and when you flip it over, a detailed illustration of the … things … they intend to do with us.
A picture of Australia with a caption:
“You may keep this one. The rest is ours.”
Humans of Earth! I have come in peace. You need not fear me. I mean you no harm. However, it may be important to know that most of you will not survive the next 24 hours. And those of you who do survive will be enslaved and experimented on. You should in no way take any of this personally — it’s just business! So, just to recap: I come in peace, I mean you no harm, and you all will die. Gallaxhar out
We’re boned.
“Please start applying meat tenderizer to yourselves”
“Re-send this message to 10 other planets and you will have good luck for the next week!!!1!!”
“It puts the lotion on its skin, or it gets the orbital bombardment again.”
We come from Uranus.
My favorites:
Hello. Got any fish?
Greeting in the name of Jesus Christ Amen. I am Hakunah Mattatta, President of Totally Notascam Bank, Inc. You are to inherit the sum $4235981.06 in US Dollar…
The only thing worse than that would be “We come *for *Uranus.” :eek: :eek:
This isn’t my idea, it came from a story that was posted or linked on Reddit, but it would be one message, never repeated:
"BE QUIET. THEY’RE LISTENING."
Just an inscription: “Machines of Earth - message understood - we will rid you of the troublesome vermin depicted here”
“for”? Bad
“In” worse:cool:
First message details their awesome weapons, things that wipeout solar systems. We are staggered.
Second message asks us to hide them from the really powerful guys.
“You sound tasty. Are Fava beans currently in season?”
*“Plea for help received. Coming to your rescue.
We are a great civilization. A tremendous civilization. The best civilization. We have huge brains. Really huuge. Other aliens will tell you we have the hugest brains in the galaxy. And, nobody respects downtrodden worlds like yours as we do. Huge respect. Really huge.
We launched your way the very very very biggest interstellar star fleet armada the universe has ever seen. Really, really big. We demand the place you call ‘Mexico’ to pay for it.
We know what you need, so our first order of business will be to grab you by your collective p…”*
Is that you, Captain Smek?