Dammit Lawrence?
I’m sorry; I meant Jennifer Aniston’s twin sister.
My hair Is nice like Anistons. But my eyes are wet.
The Phillips head screwdriver was invented by Henry F. Phillips 26 years before the Phillips head screw. He died before he ever saw his invention used.
The human appendix does have a purpose. If you learn to flex a certain muscle just right, it’ll make you turn invisible.
I once hit a cue ball hard and fast enough to make it bounce off opposite cushions seventeen times.
Fish have names and will come if you call them by the correct one.
Good one!
-
It’s illegal for space aliens to work as pizza deliverypersons in Carmel, California.
-
The Brazilian national dish is Teddiero y Latexo, broiled Teddy bear stuffed with rubber O-rings and served in a tasty elm-leaf sauce.
Most strippers are hard working girls doing what they can to graduate college.
The Earth moves 1/2" closer to the Sun every day. In, roughly, ten years, each man, woman and child will have an incredible tan.