- The guy who complained to management that the water level was to high in the toilet because his scrotum hung in the water.
- The woman who complained to management that the toilet was 1/4" to low and was causing her knee problems.
- The guy who went into the last of 4 stalls and always stood facing the toilet but no one ever heard him pee. He went there A LOT. We assumed he was jerking off.
- The tall guy who would look over the stall door to talk to you.
- It wasn’t at work, but I went into the bathroom at a restaurant and a guy coming out was licking his fingers. I still can’t come up with any reason why anyone would ever do that. My imagination fails me.
Mine doesn’t involve the toilet at all. One guy is upset if the trash bin for paper towels is not flush in the corner. If he comes in and finds it out of place smash! it goes against the wall. Which makes one jump three feet if you are sitting in a stall.
He talks to himself also, but the smashing is the really odd behavior.
If one wants a break, you can’t read the paper while using the urinal. Well, I guess you can, but I’ve never been unlucky enough to see someone doing so.
Send guy #4 to peak at guy #3. Mystery solved.
Getting back to this: Your hands carry the nastiest germs, not your penis. Assuming you dont have some weird disease, and you were’t just coming back from a session of bareback butfucking, your penis has been carefully washed, then wrapped in two layers of clothing. Meanwhile you hands have been touching everything.
Thus, the idea that “you should wash your hands as you touched a naught bit” is wrong. It leads to ritualistic handwashing. You have all seen it, likely many of you do it: you simply run the fingers briefly thru a little cold water, and then dry. *Worse than useless. *
So, the dude who comes in, carefully washes his hands using plenty of soap & water- then pees, then walks out: is cleaner than the dude who pees, then does the ritualistic handwashing.
Like the Yale man- I dont pee on my hands. I often wash my hands both before and after, actually.
I disagree. Yeah, your penis* is clean after you bathe and dress. Then you put on underwear and (presumably) trousers. Your underwear shifts against the skin of your nether regions as you walk, stand, and sit, spreading bacteria from your anus - which I think we can all agree is teeming with all sorts of bacteria that you should not share - to your scrotum and your penis. Unless you pre-emptively wear a condom or spray-on underpants, you should assume that your penis is fairly germy.
If you use a urinal without an automatic flusher and have to touch the handle, I don’t care if your penis has an antibacterial coating that’s sterilized with UV rays as you open your fly - that handle is disgusting and you should wash.
*Those playing without a penis of their own may envision the penis of a friend, relative, or favorite male stripper for the purposes of this exercise.
One guy at work I call “The Frisker”. He stands with hands pressed against the wall, feet back and apart, in full police frisk pose.
Well, few of us have Ron Jeremy sized dongs that can touch their own anus, but I congratulate you, sir.
Say hello to Ron for me, I havent seen him in decades.
And sure, that handle is disgusting. So are the handles of the water faucets and the door of the restroom.
My point is not that you shoulnt wash you hands after urinating, it’s that it’s not “touching your naughty bits” it is a general routine of cleanliness. Its that your hands are far and away more germ ridden than your penis. Not that your penis is antiseptic.
The dude who thoroughly washes his hands the right way before peeing, is far, far better than the dude who pees than only does a ritualistic handwashing- where
you simply run the fingers briefly thru a little cold water, and dry.
here’s how to do it right:
*First one should rinse hands with warm water, keeping hands below wrists and forearms, to prevent contaminated water from moving from the hands to the wrists and arms. The warm water helps to open pores, which helps with the removal of microorganisms, without removing skin oils.[28] One should use five milliliters of liquid soap, to completely cover the hands,[28] and rub wet, soapy hands together, outside the running water, for at least 20 seconds.[29] The most commonly missed areas are the thumb, the wrist, the areas between the fingers, and under fingernails. Artificial nails and chipped nail polish harbor microorganisms.[28]
Then one should rinse thoroughly, from the wrist to the fingertips to ensure that any microorganisms fall off the skin rather than onto skin.[28]
One should use a paper towel to turn off the water. Dry hands and arms with a clean towel, disposable or not, and use a paper towel to open the door.*
If my hands are in any way dirty or if it has been more than a few hours since I last washed- I wash like that before AND after urinating.
Sounds like somebody needs to stop grabbing Mr Winky every two minutes.
Because there’s this guy in there watching and taking notes on everyone’s bathroom habits, apparently. 
I lock the door even if I’m standing and peeing for the same reason I haven’t used a urinal since I was a kid, I just prefer to have as much privacy as I can when I do my “business”, but that wouldn’t account for someone who would normally use a urinal and only uses a stall because of the lack of an open one. I would guess then it’s just because it’s a habit to lock the stall when you go in, and they don’t even think about not locking it just because they’re not pooping.
I work in an office complex that shares bathrooms with a company that employs many non-English speaking Asian women. They all flush immediately upon enter the stall, sometimes several times. Then, of course, they flush upon finishing. Why must they flush when they enter the stall? The bathrooms are kept very clean. Someone actually posted a sign in each stall requesting women not flush until they’ve finished, but the signs go ignored, presumably because of a language gap. What is the reasoning behind flushing a perfectly clean toilet before using it?
If you ever find out, lemme know. I work with English-only-speaking Murrikans who do the same damn thing, and all I can think is, “What, your peepee is so fancy you can only allow it to fall into fresh, clean, pure (well, used to be) drinking water?” :mad: So very many people on this planet die daily because they can’t get clean drinking water – some people will live and die never once having sipped cold, pure water – and you have to flush *before *pissing?
Was it this guy?
Maybe he’s trying to put a little English on it.
I knew a guy who did the hand wash when he entered the bathroom. Someone asked why and he said he used to be a jet engine mechanic in the Navy and you only touch your penis once with jet fuel on your hands before you develop the habit of washing first.
When there is just me and another guy, I’ll break the tension by complementing his watch.
While not the most effective, I don’t buy that just running your fingers under a little cold water is “worse than useless”.
I know a few guys that grab a paper towel as they head for the urinal, I thought it was for leakage.
What if he’s not wearing a watch?
Say, does that take a licking and keep on ticking?
Germs love wet environments, and germs spread more readily.