Welcome Beckyvs..CPS is holding on line 1

The BBQ Pit
1

I don’t know if first time posters should be drug into the pit but the screaming thoughtless ingnorant rambling MUST BE taken to the mat NOW.

In this GQ thread this woman is asking for info on how to administer saltpeter to her 14 year old stepson to cripple his sexual function to save him from the wiles of a 13 year old lady friend.

Oh how I wish I could somehow channel MEBuckner for some artful prose but here goes.

Are you completely, absolutely ditchbank okie, born under a rock in the middle of the sahara CUBIC STUPID. Fuck woman, you are an insult to mature thought. Maybe if you’re lucky your stepson will get his hands on some heavy anti-depressants that inhibit orgasms and slip them into you dinner (sorry dont know the names but I know its a comon side effect to some of them). See how much it fucks you up when you don’t understand why your body feels like something is broken, like something is wrong with you.

I’m at a loss, please tell me you have no children of your own, if so PUT THEM UP FOR ADOPTION NOW AND STERILIZE YOURSELF. Your end of the gene pool needs a 55 gallon drum of chlorine to take the edge off the pure horrid wasteland that is your petty rationalization for low grade poisoning of a child.

Have you considered therapy, divorce or maybe suicide before you irreparably damage your stepson or anyone else. As an Ex-EMT I am seen some serious hate and misery, I have never thought for a second I would wish any of that on another human being until I read your post.

Please post any excuse for this here so we can reply in the proper fashion, I wouldn’t want to trouble the GQ moderators with the barrage of warnings it might inspire.

2

Is this bitch from the 19th century, or is she just so woefully deranged that she should be dragged off and thrown in the nuthatch?

Or… should we think a and do b?

3

It may be a real GQ but I would wager a large tuna fish sandwich with chips that the OP is a troll.

4

Let me get this straight; on the SDMB you can’t discuss, say, pirating software or music without havin g the thread shut down, because that’s illegal…

…but you CAN discuss poisoning children.
Ooookay.

5

Far be it from me to interfere in a pre-ordained pile-on, but why, exactly, is this worthy of a Pit thread? The OP in question clearly asks if salt peter is safe. She wants to know. Remember what this board is all about? Eradicating ignorance?

I imagine that Beckyvs was complaining to someone about her son, and that someone sez, “Hey, I heard that saltpeter’ll cure that right quick!” So then she comes to this board and asks a question. Sure, it’s not the most enlightened question in the world, but, Christ, opening a Pit thread about it is NOT the way to encourage other people to ask questions on these boards.

My vote, for what it’s worth: Lay off her.

6

Now don’t laugh too much. Having received a ton of unsatisfactory replies about controlling her son’s libido with saltpeter, Beckyvs could now be investigating taking care of her critics with arsenic :eek:

UnuMondo, who wishes he had carefully watched his mother cook during his teenage years

7

Judging by the Registration Date and the Post count. I’d be willing to add a large diet coke to astro’s bet.

Not quite Serliney though.

8

Trollus Gardenius, also known as the Garden-Variety Troll. Botanically, they crop up from time to time, and as with crabgrass or fire ants, there is no known means to keep them from appearing. The only way to get rid of them is to yank them from the ground by their balls, swing them around your head a time or two, and then fling them into the air.

The sound they make while being swung is, perversely, quite pleasing to some, though others will find no amusement from the noise of a meltdown.

Of course, liberal application of saltpeter will keep them from breeding. And if my sig is ever more appropriate than now, please tell me.

9

Respectfully, I back zut, on this.

Troll? Possibly. I go 50/50 on the odds that a stranger might stumble into the Straight Dope with a provocative question–it has happened.

On the other hand, if it is a troll, it will not be content with this single question and we will see it snuffling about looking for other issues to root up.

If, however, she is simply an uninformed woman actually taking the trouble to seek the correct information, then we have been rather needlessly harsh.

10

shudder

She just seemed really creepy-ready to slip something to her son, rather than talk to him, and the parents of the girl. Nice way to show trust.

I just got a very, VERY bad vibe. ugh.

And apparently, “I” have “mental issues”.

:rolleyes:

Plus the new name sign up…

11

Oh, and here’s her 2nd account name and question:
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=126303

12

Personally, I was 70/30 on this one, and 85/15 after the whole second name.

But guys, that’s our job! Let us do it – we’re pretty good, you know.

And at least wait until there’s a pattern of inappropriate GQ threads before pitting them, please? From time to time, people just want to know. It’s not like in GD.

13

Excuse the fuck out of me, but what don’t you people understand about the following 2 sentences from the OP:

“I know this may sound like a weird question, but I was hoping that someone may have information about salt peter.”

“Anyway, I was hoping someone would know if salt peter is safe and if so where it can be purchased from.”

[Emphasis mine.]

Uh, did you miss the point? Are you too weak to admit that maybe, just maybe, you were wrong to jump her shit like that? Because, no matter how you slice it, she asked you a question that she wanted an answer to.

Let me repeat that: She asked you a question. Go back and read the OP…see? Yeah, a question - is it safe? In fact, it was an OP titled “Salt Peter Question” in the forum General Questions.

She did not say “I am going to do this, just thought I’d let y’all know. Hope you don’t mind.”

And as for her wanting to “poison her child” like all of you accuse her of, may I inform you that saltpeter is used in the curing process of foods like ham and sausage, so yes, you can ingest it in small amounts, and it won’t kill you:

http://www.ext.vt.edu/pubs/foods/458-223/458-223.html
http://abcnews.go.com/sections/tech/Geek/geek990610.html
http://muextension.missouri.edu/xplor/agguides/ansci/g02526.htm

Oh, and btw, it is also included in some medicines as a diuretic:

http://www.fasthealth.com/dictionary/p/potassium_nitrate.php
So why don’t all of you assholes step-off, re-read the OP, and answer it in a way that doesn’t try to make yourself feel better by calling someone else a troll or murderer.

You know, I also find it interesting that you are giving her parenting advice (or at least commenting on her parenting skills) when the first thing you did was:

A) jump to conclusions
B) not listen to what she originally said
C) pass judgement without further discussion
D) generally blew everything out of proportion

Yeah, y’all must be great parents. Remind me to ask you about all of life’s little mysteries. :rolleyes:

-Tomcat

14

The deal with the two screen names replying to her own posts is a bit odd, but I think her (his?) question was relatively harmless. She asked, she was answered rather snippily, and so she got defensive. I’m willing to wait and see on this one.

15

I figured the second SN was her hubby/kid’s dad. There are plenty of couples here who post from the same ISP with different accounts.

16

She also wants to control her son’s sexuality, without him knowing, with chemicals.

And THAT doesn’t offend anyone?

17

…without the supervision of a doctor

18

No, actually that sounds like every parent’s dream, if it were safe and cheap and had no horrible side effects.

Now perhaps I feel this way because a co-worker is engaged to a man who , at age 27, has 7 (yes, seven) children by several women, and the oldest is 15. Did you do the math? He was 12, the girl was 14. And he didn’t take a loooooong break before child #2 came along, or # 3, or #4, or #5, or #6, or #7. I’m sure there were nights his parents dreamed of something they could slip into his orange juice.

So no, it’s not offensive, it’s just totally unrealistic and impractical and illegal. But since my 17-year-old just walked out the door with his little girl friend, I hope all the long talks we’ve had work, but I wish I could do something more effective.

19

Well, of course… if the parents happen to be complete fucking lunatics.

What sort of imbecile thinks it’s a good idea to give their children drugs that suppress basic physical functions? Why not just duct tape the kid to his bed while you’re at it? Oh, sure, “if it had no side effects.” As long as we’re wishing upon a star, why not wish that the application of saltpeter raises your IQ a hundred points and causes you to start shitting gold bricks?

Gosh, maybe it’s just me, but it seems to me that when you cross the line from discipline and control into pharmacological mind control, you just went from being a parent into being a Grade-A fucktard. I mean, it’s not as if the kids are Damien, Child of Satan. The whole sexual attraction thing is a rather fundamental part of being a human being, you know. Nature put that in us for a reason. You don’t think maybe it’s a bad idea to take it out? Sort of strikes me as being abusive. But then, my parents never tried to chemically castrate me, so maybe I’m from one of those wacko hippie families or something.

Actually, yes, it is offensive. It’s also idiotic.

20

I also noticed that handy got in trouble in that thread. What’s up with that?

Esprix