Huh. Well, I get to be The Rival Town. You know, the one that sits on land near Dopeville; the one that is responsible for supplying the villains from out-of-town (not to be confused with the villains from “The City”); the one that antes up the “other” football team Dopeville High (heh-heh…now that’s a funny name for a school) needs to challenge to win the championship; the town that helps provide the “It’s Us Against Them” mentality; the lil’ hamlet responsible for every story cliche involving a buncha outsiders.
I can’t quite figure out where I fit in this town. Maybe the person who is destined to just read books and play with kiddies all day? Nah… can anyone come up with anything more imaginative?
You could always defect and be part of my Rival Town. I always need a vampy villainess. Be default we will lose out in whatever nefarious scheme we have hatched, but it will keep us occupied and “in a job”, so to speak. Eh?
Hey, the citizens of Dopeville are an intelligent bunch - they appreciate their library and use it constantly. Our circulation statistics are high! Believe me, there’s room at this here library for the both of us. I’m sure the library board will approve another librarian. I’d say that between the two of us librarians, and our MLIS student-helper (absolutely it’s part-time, Lsura - when can you start?), we’ll be fully staffed. Now we can add more story-times, we can stay open a bit later. Whoopee!
Cricket (who’ll stop wearing the bun so people can tell us apart)
Well, I have a good friend who is willing to give me his “Martini Handbook”, which is a collection of all the martinis he’s ever perfected. And I’ve been told on more than one occasion that I make the perfect Winston Churchill, if you prefer it that way.
I’m working on the chocolate martini, though. And I’ve pretty much got the White Widow down pat, so it will definitely be a variety.
So, we have:
Mondays - Trivia with bristlesage
Tuesdays - Open Mic Night with Rebound Guy
Fridays - Pajama and Martini Night
Saturdays - live bands, always with a local opening act
Sundays - Bloody Mary Brunch (as long as we don’t have blue laws that say I can’t sell liquor before noon)
That is, more imaginative than the reputations I seem to have at the moment:
[ul]
[li]remembering (almost) everyone’s birthday[/li][li]giving out a bunch of Christmas cards[/li][li]spoiling the kids with gum / candy / stickers / love[/li][li]trying to help people, but usually having that fall through[/li][/ul]
Oops. Missed your post, SkipMagic. Sorry about that.,
Well, I wouldn’t describe myself as particularly “vampy,” nor would I say I was a villainness at heart. Unless being called a piece of poo by one of the kids last week counts. (and according to her brother, I’m actually a guy… weird kids) I’ll think on that.
Skerri, my mom picked up this cute little “Martinis 101” book at some food show she was at a couple months ago. Maybe I’ll ask her if I can have it just for the laughs. (she’s not going to make martinis, and neither am I) If I do get it, I’ll tell you about the martinis featured in the book, shall I?
I’m the town’s harried working mother. But I just lost my job at the mill. The mill owner embezzled so much that we just went belly-up, you know?
I need a job. I managed to work my way through college, with a degree in journalism. The newspaper seems to have enough employees, though. Hey…what’s this? The TV station is hiring?
:::fixes makeup, arranges hair:::
Hm. Wonder if they’ll let me read the news for them. My kids’ need shoes…
Yeah, but the beauty of the situation is that yes, even though you start out a vampy villainess, the magical goodness of Dopeville will eventually convince your lil’ ol’ black heart that your evil ways are, indeed, evil, thus stopping your reign of terror and letting the world (or, the Dopeville citizens) know of your true beauty, both inside and out.
You’ll be the talk of the town for years to come. Everyone likes a convert. (Well, maybe not everyone, but work with me here, will ya’?)
I’m the eccentric guy who lives in the renovated 60’s era Atlas missile silo just outside of town. I’m on a nodding acquaintance with about twenty people in town, but few people really know anything about me. I’m normally spotted going to the library every week or so, and occasionally playing my guitar in the park, while watching the ducks. I’m also an avid participant in bristlesage’s pub quiz at Skerri’s bar.
We also need a good sporting goods store. Fishing, hunting, hiking and biking. Canoes and kayaks upstairs (with those cool yet dopey boats you have to pedal). A climbing wall to test out the repelling gear. And a full line of Frisbees®.
We’ve got the diner, don’t we need a second restaurant to balance it out? You know, the sort of small, unprepossessing, off-the-beaten-track place with wonderful food and an eclectic menu where you never know what will be on it. Could be meatloaf, could be nouvelle cuisine, could be asian, you know, that sort of place. Don’t we need one of those? Otherwise, where will we eat after the diner is closed?
I suppose I could run the hospital lab. But I must have complete control. Then the laboratorians could be allowed to actually enjoy themselves at work, have a few decorative items like lovely plants to add a little color (besides the blood) and anyone uttering words such as “right-size”, “client” or “paradigm” would be summarily shot.
