OK, here it is, the moment you’ve all been waiting for, My defense post.
I’m sorry to those who want more mob speak, but I have to go to the gym in 5 minutes. My 19 hours of silence has been busy, and my seemingly infuriating ‘contentless’ posts to some were my best effort at keeping involved in the game. I also wanted to see if people would dig themselves into a hole, because I am not the GF. Oh, but of course I would say that, you say? Yeah, well no shit.
I’ve never killed anybody, and that’s the honest truth, you know, as compared to the dishonest kind. Seriously though, here is my role claim… drum roll… I. aaaaaammmm! BA DUM! Vanilla Townie! Oooooooooh what a surprise. I’m truly sorry that I didn’t get a power role, or that I dont have the chutzpah to lie about being one, because apparently that’s a good way to stay alive and/or fool the fuck out of this gullible-ass town.
It makes me sick to see how happy everyone is acting, because we are nowhere near out of the woods yet. These mafia are smart cookies, and they have a web of bullshit wrapped so tight around this town that it makes Jenna Jameson’s pussy look like a Chinese thumb-screw. (now I’m confused…) Anyway, it’s obvious that some people in this town are major-ass liars. Note how my bandwagon drove some people out of the woodwork, like glee and some other low-profile people? I dont know what that means, but it means something I’m sure!
My way of playing this game is to observe. I observe and slowly and thoughtfully make my own decisions, by myself and free from as much influence as I can. The more you base your observations on others, the more likely you are to get fucked over, ok? It’s quite simple. Anyway, that is why most of my posts are free from content. I dont like saying something until I’m damn sure, which in this game is proving very difficult. You guys are good, honestly.
I might as well talk about the GF charge, because that’s what’s getting everyone’s panties in a bunch. Here’s what you have to think about this accussation. All the puzzle pieces fit, but that’s only because you bought the right puzzle. I admit that it all sounds very good if you think about it using preconceived notions and rely on the bullshit of the alleged beat-cop (the only person I trust is Blaster Master). I’m almost sad that you guys are wrong, because my play style would have been an awesome GF. However, I’m not that smart. I’m not the GF and I am not the SK nor anything else special, I’m just a regular townie. Of course, you will probably still kill me to be sure, because you are such friendly town people cough… mafia…cough It’s like a court of law, or at least it should be. One should not hang just because you have set up a notion that merely sounds good, but has no basis in anything factual. You’re all so happy that you may have caught the GF that you are going to kill another townie, but of course nobody will mourn my death so whatever right? I’ve had a good run, so I’m not gonna cry about it.
I’ll make an example. You’re a housewife, and on the kitchen table you see a cookie with a bite out of it. You have a little 3 year old who loves cookies, so you blame him for doing it and he cries. Of course he did it, because it all makes so much sense! What you dont know is that the husband took the bite, meaning to eat the whole thing, but then forgot about it. You made your son cry for no reason, congratulations wonder mom.
Ok, so what about the mob talk? I can explain that too. I am loathe to do so, because it totally shoots my strategy in the face, but I have no choice at this late hour, being only 5 votes away from instant death. One, I am role playing. This is a game of mafia, and I am having fun talking like somebody who lives in a mafia town. But that’s really not my main objective. My real reason was that, by talking like a mafia, I would attract the town’s lynch mob often enough to keep myself safe from the mafia killing me. Unhelpful to the town? Perhaps, but I want to live damnit. I figured if I talked like a mafia and stirred shit up every now and then, I would keep myself safe from the mafia. So far it’s been working, but I didn’t think I would be in the shitter with the lynch mob so soon. It’s a risk I thought I couuld take. Anyway, now that I’ve explained myself, my whole strategy is dead, so I expect to die in some form today or tomorrow. Great job guys.
So, if by some miracle I dont get lynched, I suppose I should point the FoS at some people right? I’m right now thinking Glee, Fretful Porpentine, MadTheSwine, PimaSpimmer, and that’s all for now. If I dont get killed by 5 more votes, then I will try to post some analysis.
There you go, dead man walking. Enjoy.