Like predatory, consuming difficult, serpentine problems with ease?
Cafe Society, you say? What about dogs?
Dogs playing poker, that is. 
Years ago I had an old Argus© poster: a head on shot of an African rhino with the caption: “I may have my faults, but being wrong is not one of them”
About This Message Board: the burro. Small, unattractive, and utterly utilitarian.
Comments on Staff Reports: the sasquatch. It’s rarely ever seen
Ever since someone pointed out in a thread on “Celebrities who resemble animals” that Cher looks like an Afgan Hound, that’s all I can think of when I see her.
Dogs is appropriate.
Well, then, GQ should obviously be represented by a hummingbird. 
Shouldn’t MPSIMS be the common house cat?
With or without claws?
Do Muppet animals count? What about Miss Piggy for Cafe Society?
And housecats would have to be In My Humble Opinion. Something that wants to make a statement but can’t really be bothered to read all the other posts.
How about Schroedinger’s housecat? It’s both declawed and not.
The fate of the cat’s claws is not decided until you provoke it enough to attack you. 
I hope it’s not just me, but I picture GD as populated by elephant seals (but of course not you, dear reader), although I should point out that I hardly ever post there (don’t want to be flattened, you know). Elephant seals are loud, aggressive, but when they fight it seems like they have trouble really hurting each other, although not for lack of trying. It’s the image in my mind of large, armless, equally-matched combatants pushing each other around, but if a little baby seal comes along it’s liable to be crushed without even noticing it.
[Duck and cover]
IMHO…a bunch of prarie dogs poking their heads up all over the place and yipping at each other.
Some excellent ideas - and me with the unenviable task of making some tough choices. This is my current list:
About This Message Board: burro
Comments on Cecil’s Columns: gnat
Comments on Staff Reports: sasquatch
General Questions: archer fish
Great Debates: elephant seal
Café Society: poodle*
IMHO: prairie dog
MPSIMS: St Bernard
The BBQ Pit: wolverine
- Think café, think Paris, think Gaulloises, think elegant ladies - got to be poodle
Perhaps the powers that be might consider adding these images to the board. Might attract more advertisers…
I really should start spending more time over there.
The one without claws is being stalked by the wolverine.
IMHO could easily be lemmings, the legendary ones that follow one another over the edge.
Or sheep.