I can play video games pretty well when I’m drunk. I think it allows me to “get into” the game more without too many outside thoughts distracting me.
Foreign language seems to work better when drunk.
I’m surprised at how many people can sleep when drunk. I absolutely can not fall asleep after drinking a lot. Only lay there, and put one foot on the floor to stop the bed from spinning. And then, once I sober up enough to fall asleep, I can’t stay asleep- I wake up really early and dying of thirst.
Fall asleep. And fingerspell correctly and accurately, although the more I drink, the more I have to concentrate on the coordination.
i can never sleep whilst drunk. i did try to catheterise someone whilst drunk, after an unfortunate mix-up of class times and some daytime drinking. before you judge me, it was only a plastic person. but it still wasn’t pretty.
i had a friend who entered a pub darts competition after a few too many, and ended up winning £150 off some old fat darts guys. she was 15, had never played before, and could barely stand up. she’s tried it again since, but is crap now.
I once wrote an erotic poem while I was drunk. Not just tipsy, but falling-off-the chair double-vision drunk. Much to my surprise, when I read the poem after having sobered up, it was not bad. Rather good, I think. But, of course, poets usually like their own stuff. Anyway, I was astounded that I was able to put together a poem at a time when I probably could not have spoken an intelligible sentence.
When i get drunk my I.Q. rises by about 40 points, I become extremely witty and entertaining, and I sing like an angel.
Well, that’s the way I remember it.
Play the domino game 42 without an appreciable drop in skill.
Years ago, during my “low years,” I pioneered drunken screaming and smashing things.
I’ve slowed down in my old age, however, and now I mostly say “Wheeeee!” and try not to fall over.
I can sing really well when I’m drunk, especially filthy comic songs with tongue twisters in them–my mouth still works even when I’m completely legless. This ability also extends to reciting comic lyric poetry.
Apparently, based on incidents long ago in my misspent youth another thing I can do while blind drunk is pass a roadside sobriety test. I attribute this ability to many years of dance classes. I have not tested this ability in over 25 years, though, so it may not still be applicable.
I also talk some serious shit and can run the dozens for hours when I’m 'faced. It’s probably a good thing I don’t drink much, really… :wally
Drive.
haha just kidding.
Read this entire thread
While eating cold fried chicken,
and replacing paper in the printer,
before taking a long afternoon nap.
What can’t I do?
Clean up the chicken crumbs on the floor. Much too much bother.
g’night! (at 15:43!)
I can sing really really well at the top of my lungs
I can dance with vigour, energy and coordiantion
I can tell jokes and make people laugh and laugh
I can see beautiful ladies everywhere
I can solve all the worlds problems and even work out those little irregularities in universal laws
I can have sex. (if the other person is also terribly drunk. see above)
Walk in a straight line.
Play the saxophone and clarinet, by ear, at near-professional level.
Remain neatly and nattily dressed (though very possibly soaked to the gills with hyperhydrotic perspiration).
Execute charming and incisive repartée.
Remember my train stop, and get off there.
I can sing loudly and badly. I can do that anytime (hush Jayjay). But the drink seems to bring out the bad karaoke master in me.
I can cook. I can. A little wine, some ingredients, and I really boil a mean pot of water.
Da sex.
I could smoke ciggies with abandon.
I can flirt much more.
I can carouse.
I play pool better after 2 or 3 drinks, then there’s diminishing returns. (It takes about 6 drinks in an evening to get me wobbly/slightly slurring speech).
Dancing. I normally hate dancing because even though I probably look like a normal/decent dancer I just feel incredibly awkward. Lower inhibitions = more comfortable dancing.
Speaking of lower inhibitions, my most mind-blowing kisses were when drunk.
I’m a fast/pretty accurate typist, and I have to be really drunk to get worse at typing.
Mildly “athletic” activities - running around, climbing lots of stairs, casual sports like frisbee or touch football. All somewhat easier after a couple drinks. Probably due to feeling more relaxed, and I’ve also noticed that I have more “endurance.” For example, my apartment is on the 17th floor in my building. Sometimes I’ll climb the stairs to get some exercise. It’s much easier after a few drinks, as then I don’t “feel the burn” in my legs as much.
Sleeping. I can sleep like the dead after getting really drunk. And I’m pretty good at remembering to drink a bunch of water during the evening and before going to bed, so I almost never have a hangover.
I can sing “I am a very model of a modern Major General”
It used to be my own personal sobriety test but then I just got too good at it.
Personally, all I can really do is sleep and play videogames. My friend is quite amazing though. At a local watering hole, they put an open beer bottle on floor standing up. They have a contest where if you can pick it up with your mouth, it’s free. However, you have to put your hands behind your back, tuck your left leg(shin) behind your right knee (figure “4”) and either bend over or squat down to get it. Hard if sober, nearly impossible if you’ve been drinking, yet my friend does it all the time. The only time he fails if he gets really shitfaced.
Remain silent.
Play pool. I agree with Waenara’s belief that pool is played better after 2 or 3
Make international travel plans
Pretend to be an expert on things I have only passing knowledge of, usually making ridiculous claims. i.e. 1984 is in fact George Orwell discussing his (in the form of Winston) struggle with his own homosexuality.
Score 95% on a midterm in a class taught by a probation officer. A juvenile PO. When I was underage. After showing up half an hour late. In boardshorts. Covered in sand. I still don’t know how I got away with that.
I can talk to strangers.
I can convince people to buy me more drinks.
I can dial the phone only well enough to call exes and engage in a little phone fun. 