As mentioned elsewhere, me and my wife are splitting up. Though this was my wife’s decision and I was not happy about it at first, we’re trying to remain friendly and I’m getting used to the idea now.
Here’s my problem - she is returning her wedding ring and I don’t know what to do with it. The original engagement ring is worth $4300 and I’m not sure exactly how much the attached band is but I’m pretty sure it’s over $1000. The sensible thing to do would be to sell it, but I hate to because I know I will get nowhere near what it’s worth. I’m considering stashing it away for future use should I meet another woman, but I probably would have to be deceptive about where it came from to avoid pissing her off, and unless I can get the band separated from the engagement ring it’s pretty obviously a wedding ring.
So what should I do? I’m still wearing my ring because my hand feels wrong without it, though sometimes I wear it on my pinky.
Do you have a female loved one to give the ring to? Do you have a daughter who might want it some day?
Go to a really good jeweler and have it appraised. They may make you an offer if they buy jewelry. Shop around, see what you get. If there’s no more emotional attachment, then sell it.
On a side note- she’s returning the ring?!? How long were you married, if I may ask? That sounds strange. I know it’s proper etiquette for a woman to return an engagement ring if she calls off the engagement, but it surprizes me that a married woman would do it. Unless she really doesn’t like you or something. I’m sorry if this sounds like prying, but I’m really curious.
Have it melted down and made into something else, or several something elses. Design a new ring then put it in a safe deposit box.
Don’t even think about giving it to another woman. What if your ex and the new Mrs. meet on the street, and the ex is not feeling, shall we say, charitable that day, what happens next, hhhmmmm? That’s right, she says, “I see Badtz wouldn’t cough up the money to get you a new ring”, and then mass pandemonium breaks out and then you find yourself looking for yet another Mrs. Maru.
She’s giving them back because she has no use for them and she knows she is imposing some financial hardship on me by effectively forcing me and my parents to find a new place to live by the end of September. It’s not so bad now that I probably have a job (I hope), but it’s not being done out of any animosity, we’re still friendly. Hell, just tonight she chewed out one of her friends on the phone for talking trash about me.
Several jewelry stores have a price guarantee… whereby if you turn in the ring(s) and trade-up, you’ll receive credit for the actual price that you paid originally; all you do then is pay any additional amount due. Since it wasn’t all that long ago, you may not be losing out on any increased value.
Badtz, I am in the same position. Divorced 2 months ago, separated a year before that. I put my rings in a box in the bottom of a dresser drawer. Last week I took them out with the intention of taking them to a jewelry store to resell them, but I didn’t. I was too lazy, plus I don’t think I’d get what I want for them. Also my engagement ring is really pretty and I still have some emotional attachment to it. Bottom line–if you need the money, sell them. If you don’t, stash them until it’s o.k. (I get the feeling you are in some pain about this.) If you want to “re-use” them, you can have the stones reset. The setting is the cheapest part of the ring.
I’ve no good advice on the ultimate fate of the rings, except perhaps to just store somewhere for, say, a year or two, and see what you think about it then. Time doesn’t heal, exactly, but it does provide a new perspective.
I would however make this suggestion: don’t wear the ring anymore. I know how wrong the absence feels on the hand–but the only way out of that is through it.
You might be surprised at what you can get for the ring if you sell it. As you mentioned, the rock is the large majority of the price, and that certainly won’t decrease in value. The jeweler can melt down the setting, and use the gold from that.
If you want to keep it, you can always just keep the diamond. It can be made into a necklace or belly button ring when you meet the right girl. I would be very hesitant to keep it as a ring if you give it to a new sweetie. There might be a lot of perceived baggage associated with the ring.
I say stop wearing your own wedding band when you feel like it. I’m sure it will come right off when you are ready to start dating again.
I may look into selling it. I think the stone was about 2/3 of what I paid for it ($1300 less than it appraised for when we got it insured), I can’t remember what letter it was but it was the second best quality. Not very big, though, though I can’t remember how much right now…
I’m ready to start dating now. Tomorrow I call the Columbian girl I met in History class. Also found out that a friend’s wife has a crush on me but I don’t think I want to go there just now.