Let me assure we guys with a belly do not wear the pants “under their spare tire” by design. The shape of the abdomen and gravity tend to pull the front of belt line of the average pant to slip below and reach what you call “under the tire”.
I find “fish-face” to be downright homely. That’s a biggie for me.
My standards aren’t too high. Body hair doesn’t bother me in the least. I much prefer a guy with chest hair to one without. Good hygiene is a must. To me that basically means being clean, wearing clean clothes, brushing one’s teeth, etc. Really, really bad teeth are definitely a turn-off. I do like a guy with a bit of substance to him, but morbid obesity is a turn-off. I want someone who I can be active with, who will go on walks and bike rides with me, that sort of thing.
I think the biggest turn-off for me when it comes to men is attitude. Men who think they’re God’s gift to women are out. Men whose standards for women are higher than his standards for himself are out. (You know the ones. Their girlfriends/wives have to look/be perfect but they can be total slobs.) I take notice of how a guy treats his mother, sisters, and other women. I might lust after a bad boy, but I’d be very unlikely to have a relationship with one.
Most of the things I find unattractive are a result of grooming rather than physicality. Dredlocks gross me out. I don’t like anything besides ears to be pierced. Long or short hair is okay, as long as it’s clean and well-groomed. Full beard or clean-shaven is equally attractive, but I hate soul patches. Some men carry a little extra weight well, but heavily overweight men are not attractive.
Hairiness is no problem, but smelliness is. If you don’t bathe at least once a day, stay away.
I think the biggest thing I find ugly in a man is a lack of comfort with themselves. When I’m walking down the street, or attending some kind of social gathering, the men I’ll categorize as handsome are those who “own their look” and have a comfortable pride in their appearance. I’ve found myself attracted to men with everything from buzz-cut to ponytails, and from suits to sarongs, as long as they’re “working it”. Men with comb-overs or overly elaborate facial hair give me the impression of trying too hard to be someone they’re not. Those who don’t mind their posture or cleanliness strike me as lazy and unattractive. My own husband is slim and wiry, with a seasonal beard and a furry chest and back. He doesn’t go out of his way to be stylish, just neat. I think he looks devilishly sexy.
Totally. Ways this manifests is:
- tall men who slouch
- bald men who comb-over
- over-groomers (e.g. I had a boyfriend who would delay our grocery shopping trip for ten minutes as he fixed himself up in the mirror - since he had a shaved head and a “soul patch” there wasn’t much to fix up, and he was quite good looking, but he was really insecure about it)
- constantly apologizing for no apparent reason (I have noticed this a lot lately)
I know, I know, nobody needs to feel insecure about feeling insecure, on top of all the other things they feel insecure about. Quite a catch-22. But I simply cannot express the importance of this: if there is one thing you can do to improve your appearance, it is to feel comfortable with your appearance.
(I believe it’s absolutely the same for women, so no double standard here. Just the challenge of dating, I suppose.)
This thread makes me glad I live in Thailand. Oh, and that I’m happily married already. 
Do death ray jokes count?
No?
Um… okay.
<< Slinks away dejectedly >>
I’m turned off by excessive chest hair, as well. Basically, if a guy’s back or chest looks like he has a pelt of fur, that is a major turn-off for me. A light smattering/dusting/scattering of normal body hair, wherein I can see through it down to the skin (and feel the actual bare skin underneath it), is okay.
There isn’t much that I actually find ugly, but I don’t go for unhealthy or unclean. I actually like men to be rougher around the edges, but please keep your nails cut and teeth clean. Oh, and yellow teeth, even if they are clean, are a turn-off for me. I use Crest Whitestrips, and they work wonders.
I actually had a boyfriend who removed his back hair with a depilatory cream, and I always told him how unnecessary it was. I mean, what’s worse: back hair, or back stubble?
What is the source of the meme that chicks dig total bastards?
Lets see:
Thinning hair that says I’m 40 more than anything else; hair loss that I can’t really do anything about: Check.
Being over 40: Check.
Being married & talking about my kids: Check.
Not wearing designer fashions, because its business-casual and I’ve got kids whose college I have to save up for: Check.
Not hitting on … lets face it: Anyone : Check.
Not flirting with the Fluffy Bunnies at work because A) I’m married and B) I like my job: Check.
Q: What do women find ugly in men?
A: Me.
Find me a Dr., I have ‘creepy old man disease’.
Now where’s my wife? Its Friday and she needs a back-rub, a foot massage, and some lovin’. (Good thing I filled the wine-rack w/o being asked on Monday… 
)
I had tetracycline medication for asthma as a child, with the result that my teeth are striated – yellow and white bands. Overall, the impression is yellow. They can’t be whitened by bleach or anything, the coloring is in the enamel.
Would it be worthwhile to get them capped (if I could afford it)?
You also have a wonderful sense of humor and I like how you write. Plus, none of the things you listed are dealbreakers. Enjoy your wife!
That’s ultimately up to you. You get to decide how far you want to go (and how much money you’d want to spend) to broaden your appeal to the opposite sex.
Caps are expensive, but don’t they do veneers for cosmetic whitening, too, nowadays? Aren’t those cheaper?
This site had some info about veneers and something called dental bonding.
IANAD, btw.
Hmm, I didn’t consider that teeth could be yellowed in such a way as to be permanent. Sorry if I offended; it’s just a personal turn-off, and I don’t have many.
I would say yes, if there were a way to improve the appearance of your teeth that you personally could afford and you wanted to do it (for yourself, to help attract members of the opposite sex, so you can stun chickens with your smile, whatever), you should. If you’re content with the way things are and think that anyone who’d judge you on something superficial isn’t someone you’d want to be with, anyway, then I wouldn’t. Just my two cents.
FWIW, the reason I didn’t list ‘overweight’ is that it’s never been a concern for me. My first boyfriend (4 years) was overweight, my second boyfriend (2 years) morbidly obese, my husband (8 years and counting) is ‘normal’ weight. On each occasion it was their personality that attracted me.
(Though I’ll admit to effectively forcing my husband to stop trying to grow his balding hair into a ponytail. That was ug-ly.)
I saw the Count’s photo in one of these threads a while back–don’t let him kid you, he’s completely adorable. And his ability to turn a phrase makes him even more so.
I was one of those of my gender who always thought I’d be turned off by chest and back hair, until last couple of b/fs. Seems I actually like it! One guy was a hairy blond, and one (current sweet b/f) a hairy brunette, but both were attractive to me for so many other reasons first, and their hairiness completely grew on me—well, not GREW on me, but, you know what I mean. Hugh Laurie, I would rub my hands across your stubbly face as often as possible if you were in MY life, baby! I like hairiness and stubble, me.
Love a teddy-bear build too!
But I agree that boorishness, dullness, lack of humor or general lack of education really turn me off. And if you’re not willing to keep the learning process going, try new things, open your mind, read, talk, think—forget it! I don’t even want to be in the same room with you, sorry.
Disclaimer: Some years ago I took an art class the end of which involved doing portraits, and ever since then nobody looks ugly to me unless I know they have an awful personality OR have had some kind of bad accident or illness (i.e., Elephant Man).
However…
#1 turnoff–bad teeth. Get them cleaned, get them straightened, and if you get one knocked out for heaven’s sake get a bridge or an implant. Keep them brushed. Check them after lunch for stray pieces of food.
#2 turnoff–stingy personality. You may think it doesn’t show. But it does.
When I was a child, I had a doctor who thought I needed fluoride supplements in tablet form. That led to flurosis in my adult teeth…not only are they stained with tan to dark brown splotches, the enamel is prone to flaking off (it’s been described as “chalky”). I’ve got porcelain veneers (six, on the top teeth); they’re very comfortable and durable. I don’t know how they would compare to caps in your situation; caps were never offered to me. They had to put resin veneers on my bottom teeth (they were too small for porcelain veneers); they’re pretty nice too, but they’re more prone to wear, and look darker than the porcelain veneers in certain lighting.
Do your research though…a lot of “cosmetic dentists” I’ve pulled up on Google appear to specialize in one-style-fits-all “Chiclet” veneers that look rather fake. A good dentist will select a shade of porcelain that’s right for you, do impressions to ensure a close match to the shape of your original teeth, etc.
That’s assuming you want to do anything about it though…I don’t care what color a guy’s teeth are, as long as they’re clean. There seems to be a different standard for women’s teeth though…I vividly recall a certain hygeinist asking me (back in jr. high, before the veneers) if I smoked 
.
Back to the OP…my only real turnoff is a guy with a disgustingly sexist attitude, even if the attitude is the result of his religious background.