Go out a couple of times and talk about the weather. But someday, you have to find out what she meant by “go slow”.
If you don’t understand what she means, ask.
Keep asking questions until you understand.
By the way I’m a guy and I go slow. I like to spend two years getting to know someone (have intense conversations, run away for two months, then more meaningful conversations and some touching, then run away for 3 months, etc.), then two years having a “r.e.l.a.t.i.o.n.s.h.i.p.”, then two years being friends. Then we break up officially. Maybe you can find a way to re-engineer the process to downsize the timeframe.
Well, as a very straight-forward, no-crap sort of guy, my immediate response to being told “let’s take things slow” would be “What the heck does that mean?”
You shouldn’t HAVE to guess what she means! Just ask, and do it right on the spot.
“Take it slow” was the yellow light. What comes after yellow? Red. Hope I’m wrong, but keep your expectations low on this one, errata. And Vlad might have hit the answer bang-on.
or it could mean, that she wants to do everything really really slowly like talkig slowly and walking really slowly. But I think it depends on the person and the situation. People don’t want to break hearts and make others feel bad. Maybe this is the only way?
sigh I got that one today.
Mixed signals galore. Here is the back story.
Met her at a SCA event one saturday. when I went down to take part in the fencing tourney.
We talked afterwards and I got her number. I called her wednesday and we talked and laughed for 2 hours. (she lives 100 miles away)
Next sunday we talk again great conversation.
The following weekend Sunday was regional fencing practice, she dropped by we talked, she then invited me to her families farm for memorial day.
Memorial day I meet her family, everything goes great, even had a wrestling match in the living room (she instigated it)
The next weekend we go camping at an SCA event with her friend and her friends date, the two girls in one tent, Josh in another and I in the third. plus, a crap load of crazy SCA people.
At the event, She would seek out my hand and hold it, laugh at my jokes and smiled at me with those melt the knee caps look.
Saturday night I kissed her… ok so I did the initial kissing, but what else am I supposed to do when she has been holing both my hands smiling at me like she does and standing close and slowly inching forward.
This past week, I talked to her briefly, she called me twice tuesday, then on wednesday I called her as I normally do… she called back twice. Today she called again and dropped the taking it slow line.
Very mixed signals.
Your not alone in wondering what does “taking it slow” mean.
Had this thread not been here I would have started one.
Side notes… the fact she want to remain a virgin until after she is married has come up and is not a problem with me. Truth be told, relationships are easier in the begining with out sex involved.
That and I do not have the raging hormones like I did in my younger days.
I’m currently dating a woman who is making me take it slow, and I’m loving it so far. In almost all of my relationships, I end up having sex with the person within a few days of meeting them. It’s not that I particularly would have minded waiting, that’s just the kind of girl I have been drawn to. This one is different, and I can see myself waiting a very long time for her.
I think “take it slow” is most of the time only referring to sex, i.e. code for “we’re not having sex tonight or anytime in the immediate future, so don’t call back if that’s all you’re looking for.” It can also be used solely to pave the way for a brush-off, but I think that’s less common.
I waited a year and a half to have sex with the love of my life. We weren’t dating all of that time. But when it was all said and done I was glad I got to know him before it all came about. It was worth it in the long run.
Now that I think about it, CanvasShoes, Giraffe, and mipiace have it right. It’s usually a code to wait for sex. Perhaps you two had a good conversation, or had fun, or established some intimacy. These are good things.
Be ready for the worst, but don’t assume it. She could be saying “I’m interested in you, so let’s do this with intelligence.”
I think y’all have just about refined this sucker down. (Of course you could just ask her what she meant, just a shortcut too.) Sounds likely she was giving you a green light but posting a speed limit. “Let’s have fun getting to know each other, take in the scenery, see what develops and suchlike stuff.”
There’s a lot to be said for it, btw. Falling WHOMP in love can be a rush but, man, the landings can be rough.