A woman I knew who was into S&M pretty heavily had problems when she needed medical care. Getting her eyebrow stitched up, for instance, meant dealing with doctors, social workers, nurses, wanting to help with her situation. Meanwhile she wanted/needed nothing.
Replacing your hands with DORRANCE #5X STAINLESS STEEL HOOKS
I was at the halfway point of your post and started thinking it was going to be about financial S&M, where one partner gets off on the other partner overspending their money on things like expensive shoes. Depending on the persons wealth, that can either work or not work in real life.
Al Bundy would disagree 
That’s a blast from the past. I’m not sure, since all the links seem dead, but I don’t think the girl that wanted her arms cut off wanted them off for sexual reasons. She felt they didn’t belong there.
However, there are people that are specifically attracted to amputees. That is probably a difficult one to accomplish in real life. First you have to meet a bunch of amputees, then you need to find one that is missing the limb that you desire to be missing. If you only like Pacific Islanders that have had their left leg amputated below the knee, your odds of success are pretty low.
That’s a new one on me. Another example of it takes all kinds. Is there a sliding scale involved in this? Like I buy a girl some sandals and I get a hand job. I buy her 8" stiletto heels with the red sole that’s made out of pterodactyl skin I get a whole night where anything goes?
The version I’m most familiar with is just more a camgirl thing. It’s not a trade or anything: that’s just prostitution, which isn’t really a fetish. It’s more a type of dominance, of doing things for their princess.
There was even one article I read about where they would give her access to their bank account or remote access to their computer.
Such has also led to people being quite concerned that these people being exploited, thinking there would be no way someone would willingly do this unless she was manipulating them in some way.
And, yes, I did keep this gendered, as everything I’ve seen always has the financial dominant be female, and the financial submissive be male.
Ok, I think I got you. Are you talking about where they never meet in person, just online stuff? I have read about that, but that sounds even weirder than doing it in person. And you can find a lot of weird camgirl stuff where they never meet their customers.
But this is an issue even vanilla* people sometimes have. When I had seriously cut my hand with the lid of a cat food can, I had to speak with the same doctors, nurses and social workers. When one of them asked me whether I ever wanted to hurt anyone, I answered, “Only politicians.”
*I’m not saying my sex life is totally vanilla; it just that this particular injury didn’t occur in our dungeon.
These days, with pretty much anything available for purchase, it comes down to preference and it often relates to what the fetishist grew up with and/or what particular thing their brain got attached to early on. There is a forum for this kind of stuff called ADISC, and from discussions there it seems older folks tend to fetishize cloth diapers and plastic pants, and younger folks are all about disposables – and some of the youngest folks (late teens, early 20s) have a fascination with disposable pull-ups. One young woman there wrote about early childhood memories in which she was wearing just a pull-up and a t-shirt and being carried by her dad, and her fetish seemed to be about recreating that care-free, cared-for feeling she remembered experiencing at the time.
Although I grew up with cloth diapers, somehow my brain latched onto disposables; mentally, they were somehow much more strongly “diapers, not underwear”. These were thoughts that existed as far back as my toddler days, but it wasn’t until puberty that I started thinking about them in a sexual way. As a teenager in early high school, I occasionally bought disposable baby diapers (the largest size I could find) and just slid them inside my underwear; it was basically the best I could do at the time. Before the end of high school, June Allyson was shilling for Depends and you could find their products in drugstores, so I endured an extremely harrowing in-person purchase process – including a classic over-the-PA price check by a lovely young female cashier barely older than I, followed by a long, intensely embarrassing wait for a response – and shortly after returning home I was in heaven.
Fetishes have always been around, but it took the internet to reach geographically isolated practitioners and integrate them into one integrated marketplace big enough to support such business ventures. On top of that, the internet also enables the faceless, voiceless (i.e. comfortably anonymous) sales transactions that are so important to most of the customer base.
Debatable, since the laces would be accessible to the wearer. You can however buy “shoe locks”, which typically involve a padlocked cuff around the ankle and a strap under the arch of the foot/shoe to prevent the wearer from removing the shoe. Useful in scenarios involving forced feminization/sissification.
Just like ABDL diapers, you can buy these kinds of things on the internet these days, and there are even vendors that offer female-styled shoes in typically male sizes. As far as cost goes, “expensive” is up to the customer. Some folks sink thousands of dollars into BDSM gear, such is their passion. I’ve spent tens of thousands of dollars on motorcycles and related gear over the years, so who am I to judge what is too expensive in the pursuit of happiness?
“Vanilla” is a common slang descriptor in sexuality for plain/uncomplicated/run-of-the-mill (as opposed to exotic). Point being that if someone in SF outs themselves as a shoe fetishist, the people around them will be indifferent.
It can be challenging to draw a bright red line between what is OK/not OK behavior in public settings. Legally acceptable behavior and dress that is considered socially acceptable at the Folsom Street Fair (NSFW link here with space inserted for two-click rule: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia Folsom_Street_Fair) will probably get you kicked out of your local retail mall for making everyone around you uncomfortable.
Seems like a thing medical folks ought to be educated about. Also, it sounds like the S&M itself isn’t the main problem here – it’s the stigma that makes it difficult to have productive conversations with health care providers when you’re trying to convince them that your injuries are not due domestic abuse
Yep, I was just joking on my “different flavors” line. Foot/shoe fetishes are so mainstream I think you would have to live in Mayberry to actually shock someone.
Thanks for taking the time to reply, it was very informative about a fetish few people have direct knowledge of. Sorry to chuckle, but the price check story is great. It’s one of those where everyone thinks “this could never happen to me” stories. Until it does.
In 2019, we adopted a 8 month old puppy who had really long nails, like they had never been cut. Of course, I had to get down on the floor to play/wrestle with her, resulting in some huge scratches across both forearms. So, I go for my yearly physical, my doc walks in the room and sees 15 or 20 wounds on my arms and says “somebody got a new cat.” I explained it was a dog and she laughed and said to use neosporin on them. That was it.
When I see the nurse beforehand, when they ask you the list of questions, they always ask if I feel safe at home. That threw me the first time because I wasn’t sure what they meant, like if I was worried about falling down and breaking my hip, but I was in my forties at the time. When I asked her about it, she explained it was a chance for people to report domestic abuse. I don’t know if it’s effective but at least they are trying.
I got a message on my OKCupid profile once from an amputee fetishist in Germany. I tried to let him down easy.
That’d be “puppy play”. There’s a related thing called “pony play”, in which participants enjoy being treated like horses. Bridles, reins, hoof-shaped boots, various other decorations, made to pull a carriage, and so on.
Earlier this year we had quite the thread on the perceived appropriateness / inappropriateness of medics asking those “are you safe?” questions:
With a large side order of gun debate. An interesting thread and not too testy.
It helps to be disarming.
There are such things as human-sized inflatable bee dolls.
Did he think you were an amputee? Or did he see your profile pic and think to himself " Wow, this guy is handsome. I wonder if he would cut of his arms for me?"
This is one that would fit the don’t work well in real life fetishes, I think. Especially the carriage part.
I remember that thread. To me, the are you safe question is no big deal. As for how effective it is, if they can help one person by asking 10,000 people. I’m for it. It’s a simple yes or no question, it’s not like they continue grilling you about it until they are sure you are telling the truth.
You, out of the thread!!
I was going to ask for a cite or google it myself, but I realized of course there are human sized inflatable bee dolls. Rule #34 always wins.
I purchased other things from a company that makes 'em.
Human sized butterfly costumes? 
Not that there’s anything wrong with that!