Natalie Portman’s real last name is so shrouded in mystery it just makes me a little bit curious. Does anybody out there know what it is?
One of my roommates went to school with her. He didn’t like her very much; he’s the only person I know who carries a personal grudge against Luke Skywalker’s mother.
He’s gone for a few days but I’ll ask him about it when he gets back.
I’m pretty sure I’ve read her last name before, although she changed it for privacy, and I don’t think it rolls off the tongue quite as easily as Portman. Daniel, your friend isn’t the only one with a grudge. My friend’s cousin got cold shouldered by Natalie at a Beverly Hills cafe, until the actress realised she was trying to take her order, not ask for an autograph. Then she (my friend’s cousin) and her coworkers were laughing and going on “Wowww. You were unforgettable in, um, what was it? Anywhere but Where the Heart Is? Yeahhh. Can I touch you?” when they thought Natalie’d left, but she was in the bathroom (for at least part of the conversation).
Boy, you wanna have some fun, try reading Natalie Portman fan sites for fifteen minutes trying to answer that question. Coy, coy coy.
“I am going to respect Natalie’s privacy by not printing her real name. Here, however are her geeky high school yearbook photos.”
There’s a whole nyah-nyah-nyah, “I know and you don’t” overtone that I unfairly transfer to the actress. Bad Myron, bad.
Anyway, I know and you don’t.
Myron
nyah-nyah-nyah
I know someone with a grudge against Natalie Portman, too. She went to summer camp with Ms. Amidala and says she’s the biggest bitch she’s ever met. Maybe we should start a “Who here knows someone with a grudge against Natalie Portman?” thread.
But…but…she’s so pretty!
Oh well, she’s too young for me anyway. (Yeah, like I’d have a shot!)
I have a book about Ewan McGregor and it says that he wasn’t too fond of Ms. Portman either-that she expected to be treated like a major movie star.
It ain’t a pretty name. Are you sure you really wanna know?
Found it. You just gotta know what to search for. But now that I’ve found it, I dunno if I should give it away.
Tell ya what, here’s a two-clicks link:
Oh wow! Did you see James Earl Jones-talk about looking different-I almost didn’t recognize him!
Hmm, Everyone Really Should Help Learn About Guinastasia.
(How’s that? 
)
It aint a movie spoiler for Christ’s sake. Her last name in the yearbook link is Hershlag.
Way to ruin it for me, jerk-ass. You could have put spoiler warnings on that post.
I guess now I’ll cancel that order of the replica yearbook that I just placed.
Well… she is Jewish. My mum’s got a whole textbook of relatives names she threatens she could have named me.
and Darth Vader is Luke’s Dad. And Leia’s dad too. And Chewbacca was the family dog. And C3P0 was the gay uncle. And R2D2 was the garbage disposal.
Dark Helmet: Before you die there is something you should know about us, Lone Star.
Lone Star: What?
Dark Helmet: I am your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.
Lone Star: What’s that make us?
Dark Helmet: Absolutely nothing! Which is what you are about to become.
Had to be done. Sorry.
Funny, I think she is really pretty. I always pictured that I wouldn’t like her as she would be ultra-nice, not that she would be a bitch. Ah, well, I knew I wouldn’t like her one way or another. But is it just me or what—I almost expect stars to be pissy to people from getting nagged all the time. Hell, I was just a manager at McDonalds and I got tired of putting up with people. I couldn’t imagine being famous. Gah. (though, somehow I think I’d manage :D)
Now, just so long as no one tells me anything about Monica Keena or Alyson Hannigan I’ll be alright. I’d like to obsess about them without hearing anything bad (or good, which would only make it worse!)
Damn Natalie. You know, I hear she attends Harvard, and every time I drive by there I am always looking a little too keenly. Some day I am going to hit a friggin pedestrian! 
Yeah, I obsess about stars. Yeah, I obsess about not knowing anything about the stars I obsess over so I may continue to obsess overthem without reality messing things up. So what? 
OK, one smile per paragraph. That just ain’t right.
Privacy my ass. If my last name was Hershlag, I’d adopt a stage name too.
As to her allegedly being a bitch… of course, she’s 19 years old and a major movie star. It’d go to my head, too. In ten years she’ll probably be a nicer person.
And academically brilliant, incredibly talented, classically beautiful, praised since 12 years old, fantastically wealthy, and in the new Star Wars movies.
If I was her, I’d be a snob too.