A few weeks ago I was watching reruns of Angel on TNT. It was the next-to-last episode, “The Girl in Question,” in which Angel goes to Italy. The ostensible reason for his trip is to retrieve a McGuffin and avoid a demon gang war–but his true motive was that he had been keeping tabs on his ex-girlfriend, Buffy (just in case anyone here isn’t familiar with the show) and had learned that she was dating a long-time rival of his.
This sparked an argument–well, a lively discussion, anywhistle–between me and the girl I was watching it with. Angel, you see, HAD a girlfriend already, though she conveniently was never mentioned in this episode. I felt that, on top of the stalker-vibe Angel was giving off by paying people to watch Buffy, he was cheating on his current ladylove by doing so, and if she found out about it she’d be entirely justified in dumping him on the spot. My friend disagreed.
Which brings me, of course, to the question(s) of the day.
Is actively keeping close tabs on an ex-lover, without the knowledge of one’s current lover or the ex-lover, cheating? (By “actively,” of course, I mean going out of one’s way–not merely reading newspaper clippings or letters from friends of friends, but actively seeking out information.)
What other non-sexual behavior still qualifies as infidelity in your opinion?
Have you ever been guilty of such behavior? If so, how? Likewise, have you had a lover cheat on you in a non-sexual way, and if so, how?