And now to the questions that I am amazed no-one has asked yet:
Is your aunt interested in adoption, and does your cousin have a boyfriend?
I could learn to live with the annoying, jealous cousing of my girlfriend-to-be I think.
You’re assuming the aunt wouldn’t suspend the allowance during a family crisis? Anyone else in your family whose money-handling you disapprove of? You certainly seem to take a powerful interest in monitoring other people’s fiscal practices. Come to think of it, you said, just a few posts earlier:
Sounds like your argument about a family medical crisis is just a lame attempt to justify your spitefulness.
Why the quote marks on gifts? Are they not really gifts if the giver hasn’t actually earned the money herself? Would they only be gifts if they were given to you and other relatives? Your last comment makes your seething jealousy quite apparent. My advice: Mind your own business.
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No one else whose money handling I disapprove of, since no one else gives away almost 20 percent of their salary as allowances for their kid. And damn right I am assuming she wouldn’t suspend the allowance during a family crisis, this particular person has weaseled out of paying a fair share of a number of medical bills before.
Awww, now look who’s making assumptions, so I MUST be spiteful of the cousin because of this outrageous waste of money. And the quote marks MUST mean that I say they aren’t real gifts, instead of me being confused on what sort of costly things they are. And no, I am not jealous. I AM pissed at this waste of money, which could be spent on much better things, ie, living costs for the old people in the family. I’d find it pretty creepy and disturbing if my parents are to start giving me 20% of their earnings as allowance. Wouldn’t you?
Eh, I kinda know how you’re feeling, Gubenator. My mother gives a nice chunk of her income to my brother and his family out in Arizona, who for the life of them, can’t seem to get their shit together.
Of course, it directly affects me because here I am struggling to make ends meet and pay my tuiton, pay for books ect, while brother and co. are out there in Arizona, literally smoking all the money my mother is consistantly giving them away. She knows it too, but she keeps on writing those checks.
I know she does it because they have a kid and I’m known for being the most responsible of all of the children, and therefore much more able to support myself, but still. I find myself constantly fighting off the bitterness that builds up inside of me every time I hear about my mother giving them money that I could desperately use. (I’ve never recieved a dime from my mother, outside of birthday and Christmas presents).
So yeah, I see where you’re coming from. But you know what? Getting bitter and spiteful over it just makes the situation worse. Just take a deep breath and be grateful that you’re not totally dependant upon your parents to live.
It’s really all you can do.
So it’s the aunt you’re really mad at? For daring to decide for herself how she’ll spend the money she earns? If she’s not carrying her burden to help with aged parents, fair enough to disapprove. But why blame your cousin for her mother’s behavior? Other than jealousy at all the nice stuff she has, and you don’t?
Ah, I see. So you don’t even know what things your cousin is giving, but you assume they’re costly. I repeat – it’s clear you dislike your cousin (you said so yourself) and your antipathy is warping your judgment. Go on railing at her for her mother’s behavior, if it makes you happy. It’s a waste of time and emotional energy, but it seems to suit you.
lezlers, you have my sympathy. You’re getting shafted for being responsible, and it hurts. I’ve seen it happen to some of my friends, and it’s rotten. You’re quite right – brooding in bitter resentment about it is useless and will only hurt you more.
I’m far less sympathetic to gubernator, since it’s his aunt, not his parents, who is spending money in a way he disapproves of; also that he’s blaming the recipient rather than the doer of the (to him) despicable behavior. The comment about clothing – “my entire wardrobe is probably worth less than one month’s worth of her allowance.” – is about as spiteful as you can get.
Actually, putting quotation marks around the word “gifts” means exactly that: that you think they aren’t real gifts. If that’s not what you meant, you shouldn’t have put quotation marks around it.
And again, if you’ve got no claim on this money, how is what it gets spent on any of your affair?
Is there some cultural thing going on here? If everyone in the extended family is expected to help pay for certain family members’ (grandma and grandpa or whoever else) medical expenses, and auntie is shirking her duty to pay “her share” in order to lavish spoiled cousin with money to piss away, I think that would be a reason to be pissed. That means that the rest of the extended family is having to pay more to cover the bills that auntie won’t.
If that’s not the case, then I don’t see what the big deal is. Other than it is irritating to see a family member to piss money away and spoil someone who is already somewhat obnoxious or irresponsible.
yosemitebabe, I’d say this raises some questions. Is the cousin really a spoiled bitch? Well, he says she’s an unpleasant person, but then admits he never liked her – not exactly the best source for an unbiased assessment of her character, I’d say. And if she knows he doesn’t like her, well, she’s not very likely to be pleasant to him, is she? He also admits the aunt’s “tossing her money down the drain” doesn’t affect him much. Then later he comes up with the family-elders-need-support argument.
For all we know, his information on whether the aunt contributes to family crises could be secondhand lies from relatives who dislike the aunt and backstab her. The cousin could actually be a kind, generous girl who loves her mother dearly and takes care of her friends. Or aunt and daughter could be just as horrid as gubernator says they are. Either way, his aunt’s fiscal practices aren’t any of his business.
I wish somebody would send me an allowance.
Aw, come on, pepperlandgirl – think bigger than that. Me, I want a trust fund. A multimillion-dollar one would be nice. 
When my uncle abandoned by dear aunt nearly 45 years ago, she single-handedly raised 4 kids on a telephone operator’s salary. Her two older sons are currently living on whatever you and me are giving them each month for their various phony workers compensation claims. That and whatever my aunt can scrape up each month from her pension to send their way.
I do feel badly for my aunt because I think she genuinely tried to raise them the best way she knew how. However, she made one terrible mistake in their upbringing and that is subsidizing them long after they should have been out on their own. Pity for all of them. Because thanks to mom’s ubiquitous and unnecessary safety net, two of them never learned to fly on their own. And now they are in their 40s and are full-fledged fuck-ups.
So, please, don’t feel jealousy over your cousin’s allowance. Your aunt is doing her no favors. Your parents don’t give you a 15000 dollar allowance? Good. As long as you have a healthy body and a mind that works, your parents shouldn’t be supporting you. The greatest gift a parent can give us is not money, but rather the confidence and tools to support ourselves.
Meh. somebody owes me 15000NTD for just reading through this silly thing.
And I thought that Taiwan had a national health insurance scheme… And here it is! Don’t worry too much about the old 'uns.
Another thing to take into account is that kids in Taiwan go through utter hell to get into university - an entire childhood more or less wasted memorizing answers to the handfull of exams that will determine where and if they get a higher education. School from 7:00am to 4:00pm, and then extra classes often till 9:00pm or later. College is when these kids finally get to relax a little and learn to have a life. I bet that $100/week is your aunt’s way of saying, ‘Well done. Now enjoy yourself a little. We’re proud of you.’ The remaining NT$65,000 per month should more than amply cover the rest of the family’s expenses. Last year I was renting a three story townhouse over there for about $280/mo., and could take the Bride and Sprout out to dinner for less than three bucks. When the Sprout was born, the entire final act at the hospital cost us $20.
If you really want to rub her nose it in, get a real education, go over there and get a job worth NT$250,000/mo., and don’t introduce her to any of your cow-orkers. That NT$15,000 is chump change.
I think I’m jealous…
Yep.
I am. Feh.
Yeah, you are expected to pay for this sort of things.
Let’s see…
You don’t earn the money.
You have no claim to the money.
You aren’t being called upon to help support this family because the aunt is improperly funding your cousin.
You aren’t involved in this scenario in any way except as a bystander.
So your standing to bitch about your aunt’s personal decisions about what to do with the money she earns is, um, what now?
Oh, yeah, that’s right, you have none! You’re just bitching because you dislike your cousin.
Waah waah waah. Suck it up, grow up and get over it.
Location: California…
hmm…
Not till your chores are done young lady 