If this was the goal, what foods create the most voluminous intestinal gas?
While we are at it, what foods create the smelliest farts?
A friend wants to know.
Best username/title today by far.
Milk does it for me. I drop some nasty gas after drinking milk.
Go with the curried cabbage and wash it down with mass quantities of IPA. And remember, never light a fart if you’re wearing polyester pants!
I crop dusted the office one Friday after a 12’er of Ice House the night before and I nearly got beaten to death by my coworkers.
Lots of raw veggies.
Awesome.
Sugar free lollies on both counts, in my experience.
When I was really poor one of my favorite meals was a can of pork and beans mixed up with a mashed Idaho potato washed down with a quart of Old Mil. This meal cost 1.25 in the early 70’s so I think it wins most bang for the buck.
Homebrew. The live yeast works on the contents of your intestines and produces epic volumes of weapons-grade farts.
Back in grad school I roomed with some med students for a couple of years. One of them gave me a copy of a plot from one of his textbooks showing breath hydrogen content versus time after eating various foods (breath H2 is a measure of intestinal gas production). I copied the data into Excel - it’s reproduced here - though I neglected to include the units on H2 concentration.
The takeaway message: beans generate more gas than any of the other foods tested on that chart. They start making large volumes of gas earlier, and the high production rate lasts longer.
More beans, Mr. Taggart?
Dry ice.
Beans for volume, add eggs and onions for aroma.
Depends on what you normally eat. If you normally eat a lot of beans on a regular basis, your gut flora adjusts and you don’t produce excess gas. So the key is to eat a strange food, and a lot of it.
If you’re a bean eater, try cruciferous vegetables: broccoli, cauliflower, cabbages, kohlrabi.
If you’re a veggie eater, try beans.
If you normally eat both cruciferous veggies and beans, try some psyllium fiber (but follow the label directions and make sure you’re drinking plenty of water; don’t want to plug things up.)
If you’re lactose intolerant, nonfat milk’s your ace in the hole. Nonfat milk has slightly more lactose per ounce than whole milk.
I believe this, as I came to a realization not too long ago that artificial sweeteners do a hurrible number on my gut. Figured it out after using Coke Zero as my go-to road drink for a while.
Combine that with a little lactose intolerance, and some of my most horrible gas has been after bingeing on low-calorie ice cream. :eek:
Add to that a sack of White Castle sliders, and you don’t want to be around me for days. (Or at least it will give you another reason not to be around me.)
straight up strong coffee
Use it to wash down Brussels Sprouts or cabbage. Deadly!
Hey, that reminds me. St. Patty’s day is coming up! 
Fart recipe:
One can of beans.
One glass of milk.
One bottle of beer.
Whatever is in my dog’s dry food. He can clear the entire house, and does so with regularity.