I’m looking to fill up a trash bag with my gas. I need it to smell really bad. What are some foods that I can scarf down to blend it with my gastrointestinal juices to give it bad mojo?
Peanut butter and pickle sandwiches.
If is sounds bad going in, you should smell it coming out…
Also, lots and lots and lots of garlic (on pizza, perhaps). Nothin’ like a garlic-y fart.
For me, I have found that cabbage produces my most putrid gas.
But generally speaking, eats lots of leafy vegetables. They always produce lots of gas!!!
Garlic AND onions.
Peanut butter and pickles, I swear by it. Regular ol’ peanut butter, white sandwich bread, and dill pickle slices (like for hamburgers). Produces large volumes of gas AND it’s horridly stinky.
I only eat PB&P when I’m going hiking the next day.
LARGE volumes…
Just block out your fears, steele your nerves, chow some PB&P, and wait 12 hours. You’ll see.
HORRIDLY stinky…
(Professional on a closed course, do not attempt.)
For me, dairy. I have a mild digestive problem, best summed up as ‘why, Miss Scarlet, I don’t know nothin’ about digestin’ no lactose’. I tend to be at my vilest after consuming milk - cheese and ice cream don’t bother me at all.
Broccoli. After a particularly hideous road trip with Mr. Seawitch, he is no longer allowed to eat it for 48 hours before I will be spending the day locked in the car with him.
He asked me the other day about the Cabbage Soup Diet. Pray for me.
If you want to topple a small nation heres how you do it. Go down to your local White Castle, order 20 bacon cheeseburgers, some onion rings, and ONE order of clam strips. Think of the clam strips as the final pinch of “newt foot” that one drops into the bubbling cauldron causing it to explode.
You will be no less then a god after eating that concoction.
Potato salad, with beans on the side, followed by Garlic and Onion chips (with sour cream to dip them in) should stink up things within a 5-mile radius or so.
Several whole coconuts. Or at least one.
Not commonly known as a problem food, but there is a really embarrassing story to do with this.
I’ve heard great things about pickled eggs. Well, “great” in this context, anyway.
I’d consider another hobby. Get out much?
brussel sprouts, fried onions, french toast
Roasted garlic or roasted onions.
I’m curious about the mechanics of this and how you intend to maintain a useful seal between the bag and your trumpeting anus as you spew your vile noxiousness into the bag. I can imagine scenarios involving the tube from a roll of paper towels duct taped to your winking hell hole and then attached to the bag. God forbid, however, that a fire or similar emergency would cause to have to flee into the street with that arrangement taped to your hind quarters, blowing in the wind as the fire truck arrives.
Also bear in mind, that while you may be proud of your wind making capacity, a standard issue trash bag is likely to be far more than you can even begin to fill up with the aromatic serenades from your barking little brown rose.
Wouldn’t simply smearing the inside of the bag with your own feces achive the same end and be just as classy a move.
lmao @ astro.
good point though i think a smaller bag would be better, at least to practice on. why not try collection over water whilst in the bath? use an old margerine tub or something similar and collect the bubbles as they rise. rember to fill the container full of water before turning it upside down though. when you have collected a suitable number of bubbles, put the lid on the container and you can then take it out the water.
then you can go up to a mate and ask him to smell your freshly picked strawberries.
Even if you could get the gas in the bag it, how long do you think it would stay there?
In the interest of keeping this in General Questions, is there some scientific evidence of what foods most assist the production of excess gasses?
For those who wonder on how I will collect the barks from spiders. It is simple, I will get the standard 20 gallon trash bag. While holding in my army of spiders. I will grasp the middle of the bag. Then I will flare out the sides to encompass my ass. Then I shall release the hounds.
I liked the white castle Idea.
We in the south have Krystals. I have found that Fritos brand corn chips with Frito brand bead dip. Plus a sandwhich at a fast food joint containing lots of veggies is a way to clear a movie theater.
I should know I have done that.
Anyway filling a garbage bag full of Flatulance is not impressive. If you can inflate a baloon full of your ass gas then I might be impressed.