Obviously so you could report back to us a couple of hours later.
Well??
Usually pissing, but when the planets all align and that perfect dump occurs (not too moist, not too gassy, not too messy), the feeling is almost sublime.
My first conscious thought upon waking this a.m. was, “Why did I type `sluts.’ I meant HAGS!” Please accept my sincere apology, and thank you to all of you who flamed me in silence.
I have to go with peeing on this one. The morning pee is always the best though because I’ve held it in all night long and it just comes out like a pleasant waterfall.
The shit part reminds me of an old song I learned in grade school. There were two versions of it but I can’t remember all of the lyrics so if anyone can help… please do. It was something like this:
When you’re sliding into first and you feel something burst, diarrhea… diarrhea
or
If your riding in a Chevy and you feel something heavy, diarrhea… diarrhea
A BM for sure…I never let myself get to the point of pain when it comes to pee-pee.
A big poop, or** “dropping the kids off at the pool”** as a co-worker calls it, is a wonderful expirience.
The bigger they are the more you get a feeling of waking up after a 12 hour sleep.
“Dropping the kids off at the pool” – YOU MADE MY DAY NIPPLE MAN!
To add to the cacaphony, double flushers used to be more impressive before the days of reduced flow tanks. I’ll never forget how proud my roomate was when he came out looking for “a spoon or something” to bust up his log before it would be accepted. (No I didn’t look, and yes we threw out the spoon.)
More fun with poop. Some years back Mrs. Dinsdale and I invested in a beam balance scale for the bathroom that was far more accurate than any human needs. So you know what we had to do - weigh-ins before and after. Believe me, anything over a quarter pounder is HUGE. God I love my wife!
Perhaps for the favorite signs thread, there is a septic tank maintenance firm in the Chi area. Painted on the sides of their tanker trucks is the motto, “We’re number one in the number two business.” First time I saw it I almost drove off the road.
Definitely draining my lizard. This whole sense of relief surges through my body after I do it. But after I take a shit, that surge is nowhere to be found.