I’m…tacky?!? Pardon me, I have to go sob quietly into my pillow now.
Drink up, dear. I made it just for you.
sig by WallyM7
How 'bout them Velvet Evis Pictures?
hell, any picture on Velvet.
shudder I really have to get out of alabama
Destroyer of grammar
matser or typos.
Typo artist fo the world Untie!
Well excuuuuuuse the hell outta me!
Anyway, the tackiest thing that I’ve ever seen in my entire life I saw while I worked on a carlot. It was a reposessed lowrider. Not just any lowrider, mind you. Some of them with the airbrushing and all can be rather artistic, and the rest I generally file under “no accounting for taste”, but this one was genuinely tacky. First of all, it wasn’t a classic Cadillac or anything, it was a '91 Hyundai. It looked like someone had gone through an entire auto accesories catalog, then said “I’ll take one of each!” It had the tiny wheels with the funny spiky things sticking out, it had garish metallic panelling on the bottoms of the doors, and the rest of the exterior was painted a dreadful red, except for the hood, which was done in the same metallic stuff, and burned my hand when I tried to get a look at the engine compartment. The interior was done completely in this awful ultramarine velvet padding- I mean the whole thing. Anything you didn’t need to see to drive the car was covered in this crap. I felt like I was in the car they used to transport millionaire mental patients. I wound up ripping out about half of the padding on the dashboard just so I could read the VIN. I was so glad when they finally sold that thing and I didn’t have to look at it anymore.
The other tackiest thing I can think of, while it does not even approach sheer scope and magnitude of tackiness that the unfortunate vehicle discussed above has attained, is a clock down at the local Pizza Hut. It’s all done up in neon, and says “Any time is pizza time!” The thing is, the hands rotate wildly about the face, going through twenty-four hours in the course of a few minutes. If it actually told time, it would just be obnoxious, but no, it’s just a decoration. Do all Pizza Huts have these? The fact that somebody thought that this would add ambiance to their eating establishment boggles my mind.
Here lies Pierre de Fermat. Unfortunately, there is not enough room on this tombstone for a proper epitaph.
Oh, and I had another question for Needs2Know. Women with tattoos and piercings are tacky, but men with tattoos and piercings aren’t?
Here lies Pierre de Fermat. Unfortunately, there is not enough room on this tombstone for a proper epitaph.
A friend of my parents had a small village café in Switzerland. She had seen in a magazine an electric guitar that had Elvis’ picture on it, and also a clock face. She asked my parents to get it for her when they were in the USA. So when I went with my parents to Las Vegas, I was determined to find it (even though my dad swore that he wouldn’t be caught dead taking such a thing on the plane with him), but alas we never could discover which store would have such a thing.
I would have been tickled pink to see that thing hanging in an old chalet-type restaurant in Switzerland.
Toilet paper covers made to look like a doll.
Those beer or pop can hats that are knitted together.
Bleach bottles cut and bent to have fins.
Then stuck on a stick, to turn in the wind.
That stupid sign " If you sprinkle, when you tinkle, be a sweety, wipe the seaty."
Those stupid foam cheese hats.
What’s worse than black fishing boy statues at a landscape firm? They didn’t sell, so they painted them white, but they still had the same features.
A bright yellow vinyl chair.
Bright tight double knit polyester lime green pants on a fat lady. People shouldn’t be able to count the folds of skin and see your pock marks on your thighs.
A very ugly female that entered a bar in just a long johns shirt and panties at about 11:00 pm. I guess that’s more slutty than tacky.
A clock that played christmas songs every hour.
The bathtub on end with a statue of Mary.
Toilets on the lawn with flowers planted in them.
A friend had this one. Someone died and the widow bought birthday cards and signed them from people they knew. She then handed the cards to people and told them to put them in the coffin. This was about fifty cards.
Toilet paper covers made to look like a doll.
Those beer or pop can hats that are knitted together.
Bleach bottles cut and bent to have fins.
Then stuck on a stick, to turn in the wind.
That stupid sign " If you sprinkle, when you tinkle, be a sweety, wipe the seaty."
Those stupid foam cheese hats.
What’s worse than black fishing boy statues at a landscape firm? They didn’t sell, so they painted them white, but they still had the same features.
A bright yellow vinyl chair.
Bright tight double knit polyester lime green pants on a fat lady. People shouldn’t be able to count the folds of skin and see your pock marks on your thighs.
A very ugly female that entered a bar in just a long johns shirt and panties at about 11:00 pm. I guess that’s more slutty than tacky.
A clock that played christmas songs every hour.
The bathtub on end with a statue of Mary.
Toilets on the lawn with flowers planted in them.
A friend had this one. Someone died and the widow bought birthday cards and signed them from people they knew. She then handed the cards to people and told them to put them in the coffin. This was about fifty cards.
[hijack]At the IRS, the guy next to me processed a check which had, on the memo line, the notation “Bill Clinton Sucks”.[/hijack]
Sing glogalimp, sing glugalump,
From deep inside the Wuggly Ump.
Osip, you think you’re going to get away from fuzzy pictures by moving?
How about a velvet painting of the Sinking of the Titanic! Seen in London (yes, England) at a artist’s market on the edge of Hyde Park.
Nice to know bad taste is universal. :rolleyes:
I do not merely dance. I bewitch. I seduce. I enchant and I bewilder. Throw money.
(Gee, Wally must have seen me dance!)
I just saw a card featuring the Easter Bunny laying a basket at the feet of Guess Who Guess Where. I may never recover.
In a temporary ‘bar’ (actually some guys garage with garden furniture) in Leysin, Switzerland for a local festival. Obviously the proprietor thought the bare walls just did not give the right ambience so he decorated them with torn out centerfolds from his Playboy collection.
quote
Or any Harley Davidson apparel for that matter…
just trying to piss someone off, eh?
I was at Daytona Bike Week '98 and watching the crowd on Maine street, when thru the crowd, walks this fellow who was in his 60’s,
weighed in at ~300 lbs. , tanned to a tough leather look, bald, and wearing nothing but a
black leather marble bag (string in the rear) and flip flops. Quite the statement for tacky. later, Tom
Uhm…Ya kan’t git there from heyre!
I knew I’d get it from the tattooed and pierced crowd. Let me clarify then. Multiple tatttoos on anyone, you know lots of them everywhere, is yucky to me, even on men. One is enough if you must make some kind of statement. Can’t help it, I’ve seen too many bikers with them everywhere, and too many Confederate flags. Then with women, it’s OK if they are discreet. If you can cover it up easily. But then I’ve seen too many women with the darned things everywhere. Just think about it for a minute…Do you actually want to be invited to the govenor’s ball or something and then have to worry about covering up the tat on your shoulder or worse yet your ankle or wrist? Perhaps you think that there is not a very large segment of society out there that no longer thinks tattoos are for service men, bikers and trashy women? NOT! Until they all die off you will still not be seen in a good light, and I plan on living another 40 or so years myself. And this goes back a little to being southern…rednecks down here wear tatoos. Educated, genteel Southerners do not sport tatoos. Maybe now their kids do, but I’d be willing to bet that they are having apoplexy just like I am over this fad. I’m sorry but that’s just the way it has always been seen. Tatoos are for bikers, ex-cons, super rednecks and poor white trash.
Besides, how do you know that one day you won’t be sorry that you’ve done something so permanent? You can’t, don’t even try to tell me that you can. I even know guys who wish they hadn’t gotten their tattoos. My boyfriend was a real idiot and put his wife’s name on his arm. Now he has an elaborate cover up of a horse. All my lady friends who are in their late 30s early 40s that have tattoos regret them, wish they’d never gotten them. I mean lets face it, as a woman, won’t you feel silly one day when you’re a 65 year old grandma and have to explain the meaning of your “reefer man” tattoo to your grandchild?
Needs2know
I plan on an Adinkra (Ghanise symbol art) symbol that translates to “Changing one’s self; playing many roles” tattooed on my ankle (my first). I’ve been considering this particular symbol for 6 months, my rule is that I have to wait 8 to decide if I really want it or not. I’ll probably get it on my ankle, as that is a place where I can see it (which is the whole point,) and where it is easily shown off. I wouldn’t mind going to a formal ball with my tattoo showing, because it’s meaning is very special to me, and I am not ashamed of the symbology of it.
I don’t think tattoos are tacky at all.
Those toilet covers that are made out of carpeting, however, I DO think are tacky. To quote Sienfeld: What’s the point? What, you’re having a party, and someone goes, “I can’t dance anythere! There’s no room!” So you go “Oh, hey! I carpeted the toilet, dance on that!”
“I go on guilt trips a couple of time a year. Mom books them for me.” A custom made Wally .sig!
My iguana's sick.
He's all floppy. Could he have
Reptile dysfunction?
-Chef Troy, Haiku MasterBuwahahahaha! NTG strikes again! You rock girl…
I have chainmail underwear.
How could I forget!
You know those ridged plastic “Magic Motion” cards and that change scenes depending on what angle you view them from? You used to get 'em in Cracker Jacks.
Well anyway, in a diner in Pennsylvania I saw a big print of Jesus made from that stuff. The view changed from jesus looking pensive to Jesus looking skyward (complete with golden light from above) to Jesus looking at you rather stenly. I was just a kid and the thing CREEPED me out!
My SO has at least nine tattoos. And we aren’t talking $50 flash from your local hack. I’m talking about several hours in a chair with some of the best artists in the country. And they are large, one of them covers an entire thigh.
With a couple exceptions from her teens, each was well thought out. Each has meaning for her. And each is beautiful.
She is beautiful (and untacky) clothed - when you can’t see a single one of those tattoos - or naked. And I am comfortable saying that about the indignant women that have also replied to your comments.
Tattoos are not tacky, the people who get them are.
-Obfus
oh. my. GOD. That is the coolest name for a band I have ever heard!!! 
All I wanna do is to thank you, even though I don’t know who you are…
Toss-up:
-
My ex-girlfriend’s Jesus nightlight
-
A 1994 BMW lowered nearly to the ground, with chrome rims, neon door reflectors, “Heartbeat” graphics, the obligatory “No Fear” and “Calvin pissing on the Ford logo” stickers, and half a dozen antennas hanging off at weird angles.
“Hand me my wallet…It’s the one that says ‘Bad Motherf**ker’ on it.”
the short list:
-A deep purple Chevette, tinted, huge rear tires, furry interior, chrome exhaust pipes out the side, and front AND rear seat sunroofs.
-Full immersion baptisms. In a Catholic Cathedral. In a pink fake marble whirlpool. With the pool/spa dealer’s name on the side in large letters. On Easter Sunday.
-The Stuart Plaid carpet (yes, carpet) in my friend’s mom’s basement.
BTW, The BVM in the Bathtub mentioned above is a frequent sight in a certain nieghborhood in St. Louis (think where Yogi Berra grew up).
The Impossible is out of your price range.
We are running a special on The Highly Improbable, though.