Easy question… What is the worst insult you’ve ever sincerely called someone to their face and what were the circumstances that set you off?
I called someone a “fucking prick” once because, well… the guy was being a fucking prick. It was at a concert and the guy was drunk and pushing and shoving his way through a packed room to get a better spot close to the stage. I usually let that kind of thing roll off my back, but this guy was several inches taller than either me or my wife and decided the best place to stand was directly in front of us. When we asked him to move he got super belligerency. Incidentally, this was also the closest I’ve come to a fistfight in my adult life. Thankfully it didn’t come to that because I probably would have gotten a severe beating.
Damn. I can’t think of anything. Seriously. Even when I was a kid I didn’t get into it with people and call them names. When I’m angry at people who matter, I either engage them in a discussion/argument that is about the issue I’m angry about, sans name calling, or just avoid. When I’m angry at people who don’t matter, I may say something about what they did, but I don’t call them names.
To myself, in my mind, in discussions with others? Well, that’s a very colorful horse, but not the question.
OH WAIT!!! I Just remembered. It wasn’t framed as “Hey you XX”, but at one point, when the receiver in the court case had been trying to evict me from my own home for his convenience (illegally) and I finally got the judge, after months, to tell him to back the fuck off, and we were walking down the court steps together he looked at me all wounded and said something about working together or some other meaningless goo that was a joke in light of his behavior, and I turned to him and said “Well, maybe if you would stop being such a creep, that would be possible.” And then he looked REALLY wounded and told me I was abrasive. Which was so stunning in its obtuseness I had no choice but to laugh right in his face.
So that would be it: a creep.
And while that’s pretty damn mild in the pantheon of insulting things to say to someone, the fact is that the guy has such a weaselly, oily, pathetic countenance, and he looked so incredibly wounded by the word that I think he was perceived as something of a creep growing up, so in that instance, to that person, it happened to be a particularly effective thing to have called him, confirmed by the fact that he practically ran away from me after that.
my last boss was exceptionally dumb and after 5 months or so my patients had run completely dry.
I dont remember what in particular set me off but I did respond with “you really are that fucking stupid arent you?”
Considering that I enjoy both swearing and insulting people, it would probably involve a long, profanity-filled rant including words like “ratfucker” and phrases I won’t repeat. Generally I do this as a joke, but I don’t know if it only counts if the name-calling was serious.
I’m not particularly proud of it, and I’ve been trying to cut back before I give birth.
I got way too drunk once and apparently called a female coworker something that she wouldn’t repeat to me the next day. I still don’t know what I said. I don’t know why I would have said anything either, I generally liked her but I think she was trying to cut me off.
I have called someone a “Murdering Fuckhead” to their face after their negligence and arrogance caused near fatal injury to someone I knew. This was just over 10 years ago. He deserved it and much more, but when I said it he almost came at me . Others intervened.
Hmmm. Trying to think of something I haven’t said. In my upbringing I learned a lot of words. I don’t do it all the time but when I do, I do it well. But if I’m in a heated “discussion,” even when there’s no cursing’s involved, and I ever call you “Jack,”—look out—I’m about to blow. I don’t know where that came from, I just know that means I’m about at the point of seeing red.
As in, “I’ll tell you one thing, Jack.”
Many moons ago, I had occasion to pop into the office of a company I no longer worked for to make a short visit with a friend of mine who still works there (his dad is the owner). Well, the owner, who is without question the worst business man I have ever had the misfortune of meeting, came in shortly after me, muttered a few words of awkward small talk (he sucks at communicating like other humans – one of his many faults), including a passing comment about some $5 tape measure he thought I still had and which wanted back. I brushed off the comment, as I didn’t have the thing and the whole question of its whereabouts was more than two years old, which seemed to satisfy him and he then set about his business of looking confused at his computer monitor for a while as my friend and I chatted.
Eventually, he stood up, getting ready to leave, and asked me when I’d be bringing the tape measure back. Well, as a former employee, I no longer had to listen to his insane rantings, so I very curtly responded with an “I told you I don’t have your tape measure, Bill, and I never did.” To which he immediately went into full on screaming mode and called me a liar and a thief (screaming and/or threatening is his automatic go-to tactic when he doesn’t get his way). So I answered with “Suck my cock, you asshole,” which resulted in him practically leaping his fat ass over the desk at me – the two other guys in the office (one being my friend) had to physically restrain him while he called me any number of nasty things, none of which I particularly remember. I do recall practically begging him to throw a punch so I could have him arrested for assault, though. And then I left and headed home, feeling a glorious sense of contentment and satisfaction for finally telling him off.
