There’s some pretty creative insults and curses being used out there. It’s easy to call somebody something vulgar. But to get creative with the insult takes some thought.
What’s the worst or most creative one you’ve personally heard?
Please, please, **lets keep it completely non racial. ** We Don’t want to go anywhere near that radioactive topic.
My uncle’s crusty old boss owned a Chevy Dealership and cursed like a sailor all the time. Didn’t matter if he was mad or not. But when he was really upset with somebody that screwed something up. He’d say to them, *You aren’t worth a cunt full of cold piss. *
I Didn’t fully appreciate the richness and saltiness of that insult until I became an adult.
Way back in the day, I was the conduit who brought the word “Dipshit” to my small home town. I’d learned it from my big-city cousins.
R. Lee Ermey’s sonata of swearing in Full Metal Jacket was a joy and a delight. The man made it into poetry.
Dan O’Neill let fly the following in an “Odd Bodkins” strip:
“En Garde, you stinking tub of grease,
Between us there can be no peace.
You wad of fat, prepare to die,
You awful offal meadow pie.”
And Poul Anderson put the following in Nicholas Van Rijn’s mouth:
“His parents were brothers!”
I recently watched the movie “300: Rise of an Empire.” The Spartans had no love for the Athenians, considering them pussies and homosexuals.
One Athenian said something that a Spartan deeply disagreed with. The Spartan told him, “Shut your cock hole!” I thought that was pretty clever and down-putting.
I belong to group on a different site. The group is called LSG - Lazy, Stupid and Godless, which is totally tongue in cheek. Creative insults are a point of pride.
My current favorite insult came from there (or at least it’s where I saw it):
My personal favorite put down is, I bet you could fuck up a wet dream.
I’ve used it a few times with really good friends when something we were working on got messed up. I had it applied to me one time. I was helping a friend cut a tree and it fell wrong. Fell right into the branches of another tree and got stuck. What a mess. We were there all afternoon getting that tree down. I earned that insult. :smack:
A cleaner version, learned from my father who had loaned some expensive tools to a hamfisted BIL (his second wife’s):* He could dent a ball bearing.*
My contribution, though, comes from a work partner (6 hours a day in a car) from the upper south who called everyone who crossed him a buttfucking cocksucker.
I was standing with several co-workers, talking about the actions of a guy on another team. The guy’s actions were directly messing with our ability to do our job, and he was generally considered to be incompetent. One of my co-workers got a bit too excited and said…
Back in the Endless Mountains of Pennsylvania we used every racial and ethnic slur you could think of on each other and never did it lead to anything more than a stare; usually more a chuckle. But call someone a “Philadelphia hunter” and you would either get hit right on the spot or asked to step outside.
I say “He’d bitch about a wet dream” to characterize people who whine and snivel about everything, especially people who always find the downside to stuff.
I am 5’8" tall and at one time, I weighed about 220 lbs.
I used to get called “Big Guy” most everywhere I went in my city. But in a different city they would call me something else, like “Buddy” or “Pal” or “Boss” or “Chief”.
I always hated - absolutely hated - being called “Big Guy”. What the Hell is wrong with “Sir”?
Recently, I walked into a furniture store to buy a thousand dollar mattress. The salesman sitting behind the desk piped up with, “Hello Chief”. I told him that I did not appreciate him calling me “Chief”. I told him that we didn’t know each other and he had no business calling me “Chief”. I then told him I did not want him to speak to me again and I bought the mattress from a different sales person. I’m certain those sales people worked on commission.
The funny thing is that in every different city, most people would tend to use one of those names but in a different city, they would choose to use another name instead. I have never understood why that is.
I can totally understand hating “Big Guy”, but I don’t see why you went off on a guy who called you “Chief”. You acknowledge that it’s along the lines of buddy, pal, mac…
Big Guy (along with fatso, Gordo, etc) clearly reference a physical trait that is generally considered negative (being overweight). The other ones, though? They’re just general slang for a random stranger you have no animosity towards. If I had been a customer witnessing your entrance and exit, I’d probably say something like, “what the fuck was HIS problem??” to the salesguy.
I was in the outfield (not a Zeppelin album) at a Rangers game years back when I heard someone yell out to Jose… “Hey Canseco, I hardly recognized your wife since she started shaving her back.”
In addition to roars from the home crowd, even Jose had to turn around and look up, a little astonished at that one.
My favorite R. Lee Ermey quote: “I bet you’re the kind of guy who would f*** a person in the a** and not even have the gd* common courtesy to give him a reach-around.”
It’s easy to call somebody something vulgar. But to get creative with the insult takes some thought.
I Didn’t fully appreciate the richness and saltiness of that insult until I became an adult.
