I’m putting this in the Pit and not IMHO, as I know bad language is de trop there. What is the “gut” curse that automatically comes out of your mouth when you, say, stub your toe or hit your thumb with a hammer or fall down an elevator shaft?
Mine, I am very sorry to say, is “Jesusmotherfuckingchristsonofabitch!” I picked it up from an Italian Catholic high school friend and have been unable to divest myself of it. No matter how I try to train myself to say, “goodness gracious me!” or, “lawsy!,” I always wind up spitting out, “Jesusmotherfuckingchristsonofabitch!”
I’ve actually gotten a lot better about this sort of thing. I’ve managed to drop down to “shucks, fudge,” or “dang.” I’ve managed to convince myself that when I swear, I’m being overly dramatic.
That and I got kinda tired of swearing. Same words over and over really. Does anyone have any recommendations on new ones?
I’ve coined a new term, which I used jokingly for a week or so but took hold: It’s a combination of “hosehead” (of SCTV fame) and “dirtbag”. Thus, I call people “hosebags”, and with increasing frequency.
But on the rare combination that I’m very pissed off, I’ve used a term I learned from a former contractor I dealt with: “a dogbreathed mother fucker”.
Tripler
It’s the Pit, so I’ll say it: bin Laden is a dogbreathed motherfuckin’ hosebag.
My default substitute for “Shit!” is “Crap!” Imagine my chagrin when my mother told me that “Crap!” was my four-year-old niece’s new favorite word, and we were all going to avoid it until she was through that phase.
WHENEVER I…sorry, had to turn down my radio. I didn’t realize I was shouting.
Whenever I bang my knee on my desk (you know, not the actual kneebone, but the soft spot right next to it.) my general oath is “fuckfuckfuckfuckshitthathurtsgoddamnsonofabitchfuckfuckfuck.” Usually by that time the pain has passed.
I don?t have a default, my repertoire is pretty diverse, and has become almost reflexive. What I have noticed is that ?mother fucker? is common in my lexicon of profanity. However, not every mother fucker is the same:
MOTHER fucker = shock, annoyance
mother FUCKER = amazement, perplexity
motherfucker = small, needling mistake
Shit, cunt and fuck in equal distribution. Don’t forget the obligatory link to the Channel 4 advert (that link was the first I found on Google, hence the tiny resolution…) (Oh, any don’t open it with anybody impressionable around)
Literally, yes. Father, priest, neighbor… all could be literal definitions. My definition of the expletive involves more disturbing imagery. It’s vaguely oedipal… but different.
gasp When and where did you invent this? I heard it growing up (although I suspect mine may have a different derivation, as I also heard the term “ho-bag”).
I generally just say “Dammit”. Wimpy, huh?
No, really, I can tell you of the exact moment I “invented” this term. I was talking with a guy about a ‘Poker Party’ we were having, and he was resisting spending the $10 to join the pool. I told him because he was declining that I was “inventing a new term for you pal! You’re part hosehead and part dirtbag. Thus, I label you a hosebag!!”
And thus began a new/revived slang term in 2003.
Tripler
Hell, you may have heard it before from someone I’m telepathetic with.
I did a scene study, many years ago, for a theatre class. It was from Carnal Knowledge. We broke down a scene, studied it for months, and eventually presented it. We ended the scene before the Jack Nicholson character swore bigtime, but every once in awhile, like when I whack my thumb with a hammer, it all comes flooding back: “Son of a cunt bitch!” :eek:
Otherwise I go through phases, “fuck” may be de rigueur, “putain” may last the next few months.
Lately it’s been a tame “dammit.” Strangely, I say it in the protesting voice that Fozzie uses when he’s whining and complaining “Kermi-i-it!” You know:
My normal default is a simple god DAMN it. Heavy emphasis on the DAAAMN.
But then there are the moments of sheer shock and horror. The moments when I can’t even string together three words for a proper god DAMN it. And then, from my lips slips this rather inflammatory phrase, said sotto voce:
“Jesus fuck.”
I would advise you not to say this one in public, as it tends to offend.
I, however, am incapable of refraining when things just blow me away, in a bad way.
My friends once tried to find the worst curse word or phrase they could think of. Much thought and a few drinks later, bloody cunt fuck was born.
It stuck in my head, though thankfully I’ve not yelled it in public.
Yet.
That’s my word when I swear deliberately. I’ve loved that word since my college years.
When I’m not swearing deliberately, or if “fuck” would be a bit too strong, I use “shit” (and variations like “holy shit”). When I can’t swear at all but need to express frustration, I like “motherless son of a…,” deliberately trailing off. I copied that from somewhere that I can’t remember, and it gets used in reference to objects both animate and inanimate, male and female. Another favorite is “mother puss bucket,” stolen from Ghostbusters.
Mine is “Bite me!” Works every time.
Holy shit, that’s awesome!
(Is it wrong that I was turned on by the way Peter Gallagher said “fuck?”)
