Yeah, you were sorta whooshed; but I think a whoosh actually tries for a greater sense of credibility than my puerile ejaculation joke.
So here’s the fucking deal: A whoosh is when somebody is fucking with you. Because they’re such a wise-ass, they’re probably trying to be fucking funny while they’re at it. It’s intentional bullshit, meant to be somewhat convincing, but recognizable as such nonetheless.
I’ve been whooshed bad a couple times. Fuckers.
All situations except driving: Bugger!
Driving: Goddamnpieceofshitmotherfucker!
Well Halle-fucking-lujah! I love a message board where the words “puerile” and “fuckers” can cohabitate peacefully.
My general all-purpose curse is “MOTHERFUCKER!”. When the situation being cursed isn’t severe enough to warrant a good, hearty “MOTHERFUCKER”, I’ll often just say “FUCK!”.
I also have a tendancy to sprinkle the gerunds “motherfucking” and “fucking” in my speech. If I’m really ticked I’ll use them to modify “motherfucker” itself: “IESU MOTHERFUCKING CHRISTOS YOU FUCKING MOTHERFUCKER!”
And what’s worse - I didn’t even think of it being interpreted that way. :wally
“ass bandit” I have no idea of the history but I like it.
…da fuck?! - for use in exceedingly odd or outrageous situations
fuckin’ hell! - denotes growing frustration, especially after repeated incidents
asshead - said of one whose rudeness interferes with other’s activities
dumbfuck - describes an especially stupid person
cockmonkey - refers to immature and obnoxious people who insist on drawing attention to themselves
agkrmpkbnganbrngak (imagine a goblin with the volume turned down) - used when you are annoyed at your own string of minor incompetencies
fuck - may be used on its own or as a modifier, when nothing else adequately embodies the essence of the situation
Mine is a very boring “DAMNIT”. But my dad’s, while not technically swearing, never failed to make my sister and I giggle, it was said with such VENOM that it could very well have been the most earwilting cussword in the world.
When perplexed and angy he’d yell “what in the CAT HAIR”! And when really angry at something he’d say, sortof like the OP’s swear, all in one word dadburnitalltothunationANYHOW!!!
Ah well, I guess you had to be there, it had the charm of both worlds, the strength and anger of real swearing, but incongruously harmless words.
My high school home ec teacher used to say “hell’s bells and little fishes.” We always giggled, and she knew we always giggled, but we also knew it was just her style. And, obviously, it helped make her memorable. 
Fucking Hell, and Jesus Christ on toast points are 2 that come out a lot.
And I use fucktard to describe, well, fucktards. Especially on I-435. There’s a lot of them there.
One I’ve not used much but greatly admire is a phrase I got from Marion Zimmer Bradley: despoiler of virgin goats.
Love the imagery. Despoiler of virgin goats! So much classier than goatfucker.
I’ve got a lot of international friends so I use Britishisms like wanker, bloody, and bugger. My grandmother said bugger too, now that I think of it. Her favorite was always goddammit, though shit and fucking-hell made regular appearances. I had a girlfriend once who said “fuck me” a lot. So I did.
I’ve picked up kuso (shit), baka (idiot), and baka yarô (fucking idiot; roll the “r” shamelessly for emphasis) since I’ve been in Japan. I had a kid who wanted to say “pussy” as in cunt, but it kept sounding more like pussy, covered with infected white-yellow ooze, the stuff that comes out of zits. Imagine trying to explain the difference to a 15 year old perv who doesn’t speak English very well but really, really wants to cuss in English.
I got paja, which is short for pajero (jerkoff, wanker) and culo (ass, tail) from a Uruguayan roommate some years ago. I drive a Mitsubishi Pajero now. No, seriously. It’s a nice 4x4, called a Mitsubishi Montero outside Japan for obvious reasons. And I’m not a paja. Binchi I got from my Mexican co-worker when I had a shitty office job in college.
Scheisse and merde come out sometimes too. I guess I collect cusswords or something.
I don’t have a default, I use every fucking thing I can think of and I don’t give a rat’s ass who knows it. Like I could give a flying fuck. Whore, shitbag, hoser, cunt, scroat-bag, asslicker, cock, puss-infected cum bubble, cock-bite, goober, farging icehole, s’ai kss (may the gods help you if you recognize this one)… the list could go on and on.
What, what are you looking at asshole? The fucking post is over, shithead.