No, I’m not a narc. But… what’re you holding?
The first time would have been when I was 18, working a register at Borders. One of my early customers was a very polite little kid, who finished up the purchase after taking his bag with a “thank you, sir!”
:eek:
'Nother Borders employee was nearby, a fellow with gray hair, who sagely nodded, and said “It always hurts when they call you ‘sir,’ doesn’t it?”
Amen, brother.
After that, mostly little things cropping up increasingly often:
-Meeting someone’s kids, or overhearing them being introduced, and realizing that I’ve got files on my computer older than they are.
-Realizing I can remember things that happened twenty years ago.
-Then there was that one time when I was checking my moustache in the mirror after brushing my teeth, and marveling that, yep, it’s really starting to go white…then I remembered that a) I was 18, b) I’m blonde, and c) I spent too much time around middle-aged people. :smack:
When teenagers bumming cigarettes off of you call you “sir” instead of “hey, mate”, that’s a bad sign. When the decrepit old guy from the 6th floor calls you “sir” instead of “son”, it’s getting worse.
ETA : Well, not as bad as if he called you “hey, mate”, I suppose…
This morning I smoothed my hair back in a way I don’t normally wear it…and promptly decided never to wear it that way again because I’ve got a bride-of-Frankenstein grey stripe over my left temple. When did that happen?
Amen on the age spots, although it’s strange: they do remind me of my grandmother and that sort of makes me happy.
I’ve also had bifocals now for several years and I really resisted getting them. It was sort of unconscious, though, I’d go around telling people that I had one of those watches, you know, that are just REALLY HARD to see! One of them. That they make. Hard-to-see watches. :rolleyes:
So the bifocals and the age spots and the creeping gray hair (though I haven’t quite made it to Bride of Frankenstein status). I shall be 46 next month.
When you realize you can go anywhere you want to and stay out as late as you want to and you don’t want to.
I knew I was old when I bent over to tie my shoes and started asking myself, “Gee I wonder what else I can do as long as I’m down here.”
When I looked at a Playboy centerfold and thought “She’s awful young”.
My doctor is the same age as me.
When I realized the reason I could outlast the much younger, faster and stronger guys in jiujitsu was because I know how to pace myself.
Sports injuries can take months or years to heal, not 24 hours.
That first prostate exam.
On the upside, traveling in the style I want, taking the vacations that I want, buying the “Go to the front of the line all day” pass at the amusement park and other such things because I’m no longer some penny-pinching college student, I’m an adult with a nice job and I have no problem paying a few bucks to enjoy my time in better ways than standing in line all day/sharing a bed in a fleabag motel/driving 20 hours instead of flying/etc.
I recently told a divorced friend that the new young boyfriend I just saw with her looked so cute I could almost toss my husband out if her boyfriend had an identical twin. She gave me an icy stare then informed me that the hot young boyfriend was her teenage son! Years ago, I changed his diapers!
I really DO have one of those hard-to-see watches. The watch itself is fine, of course. I bought it because I liked the size, the shape, the whole style of it. Trouble is, the face is kinda small and I need to drag out my stupid reading glasses just to see the time. Grrrr.
Went to the bank drive-through one morning; no makeup, grubby clothes, dirty hair. On the way home, stopped at a thrift store to pick up some glass vases for tables for a shower we were giving. The cashier rang up my purchase and said, “and with your senior discount, that amount comes to…” Senior discount??:eek:
Eating in diners or buffets - in some, I’m a senior citizen, in others I’m not old enough yet! Early Bird Special? I’ll take it.
You know you’re getting old when
* You and your teeth don't sleep together.
* You try to straighten out the wrinkles in your socks and discover you aren't wearing any.
* At the breakfast table you hear snap, crackle, pop and you're not eating cereal.
* Your back goes out, but you stay home.
* You wake up looking like your driver's license picture.
* It takes two tries to get up from the couch.
* Happy hour is a nap.
* You're on vacation, and your energy runs out before your money does.
* You say something to your kids that your mother said to you, and you always hated it.
* You look for your glasses for half an hour, and they were on your head the whole time.
* You sink your teeth into a steak - and they stay there.
* All you want for your birthday is to not be reminded of your age.
* Your idea of weight lifting is standing up.
* It takes longer to rest than it did to get tired.
* Your memory is shorter and your complaining lasts longer.
* Your address book has mostly names that start with Dr.
* The pharmacist has become your new best friend.
* Getting "lucky" means you found your car in the parking lot.
* It takes twice as long - to look half as good.
* Everything hurts, and what doesn't hurt - doesn't work right.
* You give up all your bad habits and still don't feel good.
* You have more patience, but it is actually that you just don't care anymore.You’re old when you start having dry dreams and wet farts. 
I had my gall bladder removed in March. My surgeon looked about as old as Doogie Howser. When I mentioned this to her, she looked at me blankly and said “Who’s Doogie Howser?”
Sigh.
When do you realize you’re old? Well, it has something to do with having a lawn and not wanting kids on it.
Looking up a bunch of the people I went to high school with on Facebook made me feel decrepit. By seeing how they aged I could more clearly imagine how I have.
I did the ‘look up old school friends on Facebook’ thing and no one was there. Now I REALLY feel old.
Only 26 but…
One, I have to get down on the ground in stages already. And two, when I head back to college to watch a football game…damn…those girls ALREADY look young.
For me lately, it’s been that in TV shows the main characters’ parents are younger than I am.
Oh yeah. I got my eyes checked recently, and my doctor was a KID! I swear, he couldn’t have been out of his twenties, and to my decrepit eyes he didn’t really even look like he was IN his twenties.