The more I think about it, the more I think it doesn’t matter if you’re being a good person for some ulterior motive. You’re still making the world a better place, no matter why you’re doing it.
Bitchy people get what they want from people in positions of power, but then they have to live with a bitchy, unhappy person 24/7. Would you want that?
But you’re a person who wants a cookie, same as Annie and Maggie. You’re just as good as her, and just as entitled to keep your cookie.
If you withheld something from Maggie that she needed and you just wanted, that would be selfish. But why should you have to put her wanting the cookie ahead of your wanting it?
Why shouldn’t you want the cookie, but it’s OK for Annie or Maggie to want the cookie?
imagine a people pyramid.
the bad people would be on top, constantly struggling to remain there while having clawed the way up their entire life.
the sociable ones would be in the middle, comfortably propped up by the people around them.
the good ones are those down below holding the entire damn thing up.
If you’re a good person who knows how and when to say no and how and when to ask for stuff, you won’t just get it: you’ll get it with a smile. And sometimes an apology along the lines of “I’m sorry, I had no idea you wanted that!” (as I told a boss of mine, I’ve never met anybody who didn’t want a raise)
The bitches get it. But eventually they also get a kick in the ass that they have no idea where it came from.
This may have already been said, but just be careful of “friends” taking advantage of you. Its obviously your nature to be a kind, giving person and you can’t change that. You don’t want to. But you don’t want to get used either. As for your sister getting everything by being a bitch, it may work now in your parents home, but it won’t in the real world. Especially as she gets older. If she doesn’t change her ways she’s in for a rude awakening. You, on the other hand will likely do very well in life. Just know your limits and when to say no. Pick your friends wisely and make sure its a give and take friendship, not all onesided with you doing all the giving. I don’t mean to sound preachy, these are just things I’ve learned the hard way!
As a good reliable person you will find many people are watching your back for you even amongst those who you don’t really relate to or know well. And as the others have said, don’t be easy pickin’s or a doormat.
Okay, so you’ve seen that being a good person doesn’t always have its rewards, and that being an ass to people around you doesn’t automatically come with a punishment. It’s definitely a situation dependent upon the reaction of others to an individual’s behavior. Your sister gets away with as much as she does because the people around with her are willing to put up with it rather than actually tell her no or give her some proper punishment for being an ass. I’m going to assume from the description that she’s younger than you, as being spoiled and being the youngest child tend to go together well. (I should know, as I’m a youngest child and have seen it in lots of youngest children.) Now, as other posters have pointed out, you’re in high school. Things are actually pretty different as a high schooler than it is once you fully get out on your own in the real world. Your sister may be getting the rewards now, but once she’s out of the social bubble that’s protecting her status as the Bitch Who Gets Everything[sup]TM[/sup], things are going to change. There will be fewer people who will put up with her behavior, and those who do are going to be the people who get treated like a doormat on a regular basis. In the long run, it’s better to be a nice person who gets along with most people.
However, as others have said, there’s a big difference between being nice and being a doormat. When being nice, you need to take your own needs and wants into consideration in addition to others needs and wants. Like someone else had said with the cookie story, if it’s something that the both of you want and neither of you need, you have no mandatory obligation to share or give away what you have that you also want. There’s no guilt in keeping a cookie that you earned with hard work, but what makes it okay to do this is to not rub it in the face of others that don’t have what you’ve earned. Now, if someone needs something that you have and don’t necessarily need, there isn’t an absolute obligation to give them that something, but it’s a nice act to help them out as long as you’re doing it in good conscience.
Lastly, don’t worry too much about doing good things for selfish reasons. Every act is inherently selfish in one way or another. Doing something because it makes you feel good is selfish. Even doing it because it’s the right thing is selfish because it makes you feel good to do the right thing. However, it’s just a habit of nature to not make any act purely selfless, and we can’t get hung up on the fact that doing good deeds isn’t always about just doing something nice. Being rewarded for hard work, good deeds, etc. isn’t the goal of doing it, but it sure feels nice to be rewarded every now and then. Your sister is getting her way now, but I’m sure she’s not respected by anyone for the kind of behavior she exhibits, whereas I’m sure if you are demure and well-mannered in comparison, you are being respected, trusted, and liked by someone for being yourself.