What the hell did I do that was soo wrong? You swear I took advantage of you… but I wasn’t the one who took of your underwear, you did. I used you for money and sex… I fucking gave up sex with someone else so I could have a relationship with you. Or did you convienently forget that? Just liek you forget insisting that I borrow money from you to get the hell out of my house with the crazy mother from hell. How many times did I say no I don’t think that’s a good idea? A dozen or more. But you fucking hate me for these reasons? I have given up buying a car twice to keep paying you back. Without transportation I have a horrible job and absolutely no social life, but I thought it was better that I pay you first. How do you repay me for my unselfishness? By hating me, you fucking bitch. You have no right to hate me… you should hate yourself for thinking about me. I loved you, I still love you and want you as my friend… nothing you ever do will change that fact. You can hate me til the end of time and I will still care… for the simple faat it will piss you off if anything. Actually that isn’t true I just don’t give up… and I am not giving up on a friend as easy as you seem to. So, even if you may never read this, I’m sorry it had to end this way, but I’ll be the stronger for it. You, with your hatred will be a bitter, ugly bitch until you grow up and get a life.
“I should have changed my fucking lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I’d have known for just one second
You’d be back to bother me.”
You’re a Ravens fan. That in and of itself should be enough of a reason. 
[sub]Kidding, honest…[/sub]
Want a LJ code? I got tons.
Breaking up sucks. At least you can bask in the knowledge that she did, in fact, take off her own underwear. And that’s gotta count for something. 
This sort of sounds like a roommate situation, with a (former?) friend.
Sometimes, in fact lots of times, the very dearest of friends can simply not live together. And if those friends become romantically inclined, then a shaky foundation becomes even more so. Whether they love each other or not, they not always can live under the same roof together.
I’m probably making really lame guesses here, but because the OP was in all likelihood extremely pissed when this was written, I’ll withhold any further guesses or platitudes, and merely say I hope things get better. I also hope you and your friend work things out.
Christ, sometimes I’m glad I’m old and just bitter in general. Having a reason would really put me over the edge.
Man, you’re living in Baltimore without transportation? That alone is worth a long rant.
I’m with AD. Living in Baltimore is punishment enough for a great host of sins.
Christina, I’m sorry to hear of your struggles. While it seems you do still care for her quite greatly, things aren’t looking too pretty right now. Perhaps with time and space your inner beauty will be apparent to her, but it might well take lots of time and patience, or it might not happen at all. Here’s to hoping that things become better, at any rate!
Sending good thoughts your way, and if it weren’t so darn cheesy, online hugs too! Well, the online hugs might be okay too if I attempt to cop a feel, right? 
PS: I’m with the people who say you should get out of Baltimore. I hear the southwestern United States has great weather…
Hey hey, now. Ain’t nothing wrong with Baltimore (well, there’s lots of things wrong with Bmore, but that’s not the point). There is certainly something wrong with living in Baltimore and trying to get around by ass-backwards/non-existant public transportation.
You can say that again. Public transit here bites the big one.
As for general living in Baltimore, i don’t mind it while i’m here, but when i spend any time in a real city (like San Francisco, where i went for two weeks around new year) it makes me realize what we’re missing here in “Charm City.”
I’m right there with you, girlfriend. (Can I say that even if I’m not black?)
Airman Doors— Her new girlfriend has converted her to a Steelers fan to boot.
Re: Baltimore Mass Transit: It wouldn’t be so bad if I didn’t have to trip over the heroin addicts asleep in the aisle of the bus. Or wait for a hlf hour between transfers. Or be hit up for a cigarette on every bus stop.
No, she was never my roommate… but my girlfriend of 5 months… we broke up a while back and remained friends but suddenly she’s changed gears and hates me.
And as far as an LJ, I would never keep up with such a thing… would be a total waste of a code… I rant here because I needed to vent and because I know she’d never see it.
Oh and lest I forget… I was too flustered… of course you can cop a feel, lel, anyday and as many as you wish.
Damn. Sorry about the girlfriend. She sounds like a royal piece of work. I’ve had one or two of my own after this fashion.
And as one of the Board Queers (matt_mcl, patron fag of Canadian boys, shounen-ai, and public transit, at your service), permit me to welcome you into our little fraternity.
Just remember - you DO NOT talk about the Gay Mafia.
Goodness no, I wouldn’t want to be barred for life from the gym.
Dear, PM or e-mail me if you want to talk – or I’ve finally got AIM set up; I’ll give you my AIM user name by PM if you want it.
As far as she goes – you owe it to yourself to take care of yourself first, then deal with the chaos she’s left in your life. Put on your copy of “I Will Survive” and play it over and over as many times as you need it – then pick yourself up and find the woman you were meant to have.
God watch over you, best beloved.
That heinous wench!!!
Good Lord, doesn’t just once feel like ‘over and over’? :eek:
But I second Poly’s advice: take care of yourself first. Next time you have the chance to buy a decent car, go ahead and buy it, and pay her back when you can. When one loans to friends, that’s the risk one takes, and she’ll just have to deal; it doesn’t sound like it’ll make a bigger mess of things with her than they are already.
Hang in there, and good luck.
Christina25, dont know if you remember me, but I remember you. I’m sorry to hear that things are going poorly. No one can hurt us quite like those we care for the most. I have no advice, other than to talk it out with trusted friends, like your “Uncle Poly”.
You are a good and decent person, and deserve someone who return that in kind.
Mars