I’m 35, single-by-choice, and professional. I don’t want children because I believe I would be a horrible mother. Not intentionally, but still. Even though there’s a chance simply having a kid could change me into Mother Maternal, I’d rather not try it out and see.
I’m 42, atheist with buddhist leanings. Married my college sweetheart when neither of us had real jobs.
Didn’t feel financially secure to even try until we were married eight years. Went in for a regular checkup at 35. Doctor asked if wife and I have been trying, I said “yes kinda sorta” and doc said while feeling around “you know you have an absolutely huge vericocele”. As it turns out I had low sperm count and a little vascular surgery wasn’t able to improve things.
Due to my buddhist leanings, I can honestly say that I never was attached one way or the other to having kids. It wasn’t in the cards for us, neither of us really wanted to go thru the fertility treatments. If it happened, it happened and it never did.
Both of us are professionals, college grads, making a reasonable amount of combined income. Have a healthy amount of debt but we still manage to go to the Caribbean once a year. It’s a quiet life, 2 cats and 2 dogs. I like kids, I wish I did have some nieces/nephews to hang around but life ain’t like that.
Male, married, 51. Wife’s 47. We’ve been married approximately 23 years. I’m a strong atheist, wife’s Catholic (Hey, what can I say; she’s a bronze, Hispanic goddess, so it’s easy to ignore the churchy stuff :)).
Pets? Nope. We both have absolutely no love for cats, dogs, fish, or fowl.
Hobbies? We’re both professionals in the medical field so we barely have lives, so no, no hobbies, really. We have a boat that we spend thousands on every year that we use maybe five times a season. We have two motorcycles I’ve been trying to sell for over a year (check out the marketplace to see my ad if you’re interested).
Social? My wife more than me. She has quite a gaggle of therapists and nurses as friends. Some of them have become “our friends”. I’m pretty much a tagalong to her events. I bring nothing to the table.
We didn’t purposefully decide not to have children. The topic certainly came up over the years. There was simply always something we wanted to do first, e.g., go for another degree, build a house, buy a boat, take an extravagant vacation, etc… By the time we’d begun to slow down, it was 20 years later and we were in our 40s. We knew then that children weren’t in the cards for us, and we were okay with that.
You’re not going to come to any consensus from the responses you will get in this thread. There is no generic (or general) profile that you can glean. The only constant is that none of us have had children.
Being married, staying married, graduating high school, and yes, not having kids is a sure and steady way to get ahead for a lot of people (no guarantees, of course). I don’t think most people have or don’t have kids for economic reasons, though; it seems to me that the big, final decision on having kids is made purely from wanting them or not wanting them (which is why it irritates me so much when parents call childfree people “selfish” - I don’t know anyone who had kids for any other reason than they wanted them!).
As far as I’m concerned, “childfree” means that you don’t have kids because you don’t want kids. People who want kids but were not able to have them are childless. It’s not particularly political for me, but I don’t like being called “childless”, because it’s such a loaded term.
I’m in my forties, a professional librarian by degree, and I also work as a fortune teller/spiritual advisor. I’ve never liked kids. My grandmother had some interesting superstitutious theories about this. But the truth is that I think children worse than animals to take care of and I have taken care of both. I come from a culture where fertility is often valued. I work hard to get women to think about quality instead of just quantity in terms of their offspring.
I am 47, professional, never married but willing to do it, not religious, social, lots of hobbies, roomie has two cats which makes them my cats too.
I never had a burning desire to have kids.
I planned to be child free since I was a kid myself. I refused to babysit when I was of babysitting age because I didn’t like kids. I attempted through my 20’s to get doctors to tie my tubes but they wouldn’t do it “because you might change your mind.” Well, here I am, 42 and still don’t want kids. I like my life, and just having a couple special-needs cats that need meds a couple times a day are quite enough responsibility, thanks.
It must be the industry I’ve chosen, care of animals in the form of rescue primarily and emergency care part-time, it seems to attract others like me, and a good percentage of same-sex partnerships, too. I am surrounded by a high percentage of child-free people in my every day life, and the majority of my friends are child-free, too. It just worked out that way, we didn’t actively seek each other out, but found each other in the workplace. Those who do have kids are in the minority, and them talking about their kids comes up, but is rarely the center of any ongoing conversations because the rest of us aren’t all that interested.
I feel lucky that I don’t have to defend my decision like it seems a lot of child free by choice people do. It just doesn’t come up, and I have parents who seem to get it and have never pressured me into producing a grandkid. My stepsister had one, so maybe he’s enough for them to get their granny/grandpa needs fulfilled.
We are child-free by choice. I just simply never wanted any, never ever felt the need to be a father and was lucky to marry one of the few Thai ladies who is petrified by the thought of childbirth. Early on, we were encouraged by all of the wife’s friend’s and relatives to have babies, because “the mix would be cute.” But now we’re both in our 50s, and that doesn’t come up anymore.
Band name? “Satanic Mechanics”…eh? 
But you are a cradle-robber, aren’t you? 
I am childfree and I am okay with it.
However as recently as 12-some years ago, I thought about having children. I was with someone and I thought things were going to be permanent. Boy was I wrong. So glad I didn’t do anything irrevocable.
Now I think I’m in pre-menopause so having a child seems rather iffy. I wouldn’t have the patience to take care of a child that was somehow impaired, particularly if it was because I became pregnant too late. The guilt! Argh.
In the last several years (since the bipolar/ADD diagnosis) I have decided that since a lot of mental disorders run in families, I really don’t want to inflict my illness on a child. I was a mentally ill child (before such things were taken seriously) and that must have been hell, both for me and those around me.
FYI, I am single, on disability, and my mom lives with me. I have a B.A. in Psychology. I am more concerned with morality than religion and am politically moderate. Do not have a lot of ties with my extended family or a wide group of friends.
as with other areas e.g. “libertarian” vs. “Libertarian” or “deaf” vs. “Deaf,” there’s a difference between “childfree” and “Childfree.”
Female, 43. Some college. I work an office. I chose not to procreate.
I am not religious or particularly social. I have people I like and will go out on occasion, but for the most part I’m a homebody as is my SO.
My hobbies are reading and tennis. The tennis pretty much makes up most of my social stuff. I also volunteer with a local animal rescue group.
I have one cat and would like to get a dog.
I knew by the time I was 15 or 16 that I didn’t want children. Everyone always said, “wait until you get older - you’ll want them then”. I never changed my mind. I just don’t have that maternal instinct. Plus, I’m entirely too selfish with my free time to have a child.
Please - kindergarten robber at best. 
56, female, never married, no children, professional, three cats. The DiveMaster is six years younger (behaves way older than me!) and has two dogs, a cat and a bird.
He doesn’t care for children at all, plus suffered something of an hellacious homelife which put paid to ever wanting children of his own. My family on the other had was perfectly normal, but I was born the original tomboy.
I knew from a very early age that I was utterly uninterested in children. My sister is younger by six years, so by the time she arrived, I was already involved in school and other stuff and not much into the new arrival.
In fact, unlike most little girls, when it was time to change or feed the baby, I was smoke in the wind. 
We never played house together – she was big on playing school with her dolls, though. I climbed trees, played with boys, and what few dolls I had didn’t survive my youth.
I’m active socially, religion for me is ‘live and let live,’ whereas the DiveMaster is a little more reserved than that and pretty much an atheist.
Simply put, I would not be a good parent and he would be worse. Neither of us has the temperament, patience, personal discipline, or the selflessness it takes to be a good parent. We know our limitations!
Late 30s, happily married, professional, agnostic, two cats. It has simply never, ever interested me, even as a child. As I became a working adult with my own money and time, the idea seemed even less interesting. I am very selfish with regard to my free time, and there are LOTS and lots of awesome people out there who are willing to raise children. The world is not going to be lessened by my choice not to contribute.
If not for the fact that I’m an only child leaving my mom without grandchildren, I don’t think I’d have ever felt a pang of guilt in my life.
No snivelling qualifiers like “but I do a lot of work for kids!” (I don’t) or “but I really, reeeeeally waned to have children earlier in life!” (nope) or “but I do care for several pets!” (the last pet in the house wasn’t mine and died at least 15 years ago) or “but that doesn’t mean that I don’t adore children!” (that developed free of any extenuating factors).
Let’s see…it started when I started going to social functions at…9? 11? Around that time. There was a screaming baby there. Naturally I, who was not a heavy metal fan at the time, took umbrage, whereupon one my aunt’s had the absolutely oh-so-perfect retort: “You were a baby once.” Which, presumably, meant that I had to pay for it with ringing in my ears and constantly frayed nerves for the rest of my natural life. Oh yeah, I found out that the term for this hideous noise was “crying”, which is like calling what happened at Chernobyl a “minor mechanical problem”. Whereupon I received my first, harsh lessons into other people’s babies-hood: 1. Babies are really, really loud, 2. despite the irritation and the very real risk of hearing loss, nobody ever does jack squat about this, and 3. if you ever bring this up, the only response you’ll ever get is STFU. That was a pretty sobering reality check right there.
Of course, I only had to look at my school record to know that all the myths about how precious children are were just that, myths. Let me put it this way; ALL the most sickening, disgusting, vile, waste-of-oxygen people I’ve known in my life were under 18. I’ve encountered plenty of adults who were dishonest or grating or lazy, but none who inspired the kind of murderous rages I felt during those awful, awful years. I honest-to-god wanted people to die bloodily and painfully in high school, something I didn’t wish on Osama Bin Laden, for crying out loud. And of course, the fact that NO parents, teachers, or faculty…the people who had the power and the moral obligation to do something…ever made the most token effort to rein those rabid baboons in, thus continuing the proud tradition established by allowing them to shriek like banshees in crowded public spaces as babies.
Then, sure enough, college came along, a strange contradiction of glorious liberation and creeping fear. True, I had a lot of the privileges of adulthood with much less of the obligation, but I had to make it count for something, else the final chapter would be slowly starving to death in some dank alley. A child? How the hell was I supposed to care for another human being? I had enough trouble with my studies. I could barely keep my car running, for crying out loud. The very first time I heard of fellow students (invariably female, BTW) talking about juggling education, work, and parenting, I decided I wanted no part of that horror story.
And finally, my career, which never has and still doesn’t pay me anywhere near enough to raise anything even remotely resembling a family, much less buy the kind of things I need to prevent my life from becoming an endless ball of misery. In my current line of work (public housing), I encounter families where every single rent payment is a monumental struggle, every day a financial nightmare, and the common denominator is always the same…children.
Fortunately, I’ve never been pressured into starting a family…the people around me, cold and ignorant as they are, have enough sense to understand that it’s a bad idea. But even if I was pressured, you know what? Let 'em squawk. Let 'em call me selfish and a loser for preferring video games, riveting stories, movies, books, news, message boards, and long walks through the park to shrieking and diaper changes and colds and exhaustion. Because I know damn well that once I give these bleating sheep what they want, they are going to disappear into the woodwork and never lift a finger to help. That’s how it is with this racket: Make outrageous demands and give NOTHING in exchange. Well, sorry, must be my accounting background, but I’m not taking that deal.
I mean, do you think I don’t notice things? I see families everywhere, children anywhere from newborn to 17, at the mall, in the park, in the office, and you know what? They’re miserable. They’re just barely holding it together, if that. And the one’s that aren’t miserable are either snippy, surly, exasperated, or simply oblivious. And this is what these people are perfectly willing to show us. Probably one in a hundred cases do I see them actually enjoying what they’re doing. Good lord, I’ve lost track of the number of times some douchebag did that asinine “Goodbye! Goodbyyyyeee!” routine or repeatedly refused to take the kid to the restroom.
So forget it. Not for me, never will be for me. My life is good and I prefer to keep it that way. Someone else can overpopulate this planet.
Dunno if any of this will fit into your generic profile, but there it is.
Male, very happily married for ten years:
-
I do not like children, nor do I enjoy being around them.
-
I do not like taking care of other people.
-
I am selfish, greedy, and do not want to give up my individual freedoms, time or money to care for little human dependents.
-
I am too impatient.
That sums it up.
Female, 31, atheist. 3 cats(down from 4 :() Fairly dead-end retail job. I have never wanted children. I really have no patience for most people, and children in particular.
Female, 48.
Occupation: Technical writer and freelance game writer
Religious: Somewhere between atheist and agnostic. Spouse is Christian.
Social: I am a raving introvert. I’m social with my small circle of geek friends both online and IRL, but I hate large groups, crowds, and parties, and extroverts make me tired (even if I like them).
Hobbies: Fiction writing, MMORPGs, pen and paper RPGs, hanging out with my cats.
Pets? We have seven cats. Yes, that’s too many, but we’re attached to them all now. No plans for any more.
When did I know I didn’t want children: Always. Some of my youngest memories were knowing I had no desire for kids. I don’t relate well to babies and toddlers, I have zero maternal instinct toward humans, and the thought of being pregnant terrifies and disgusts me (personally–not referring to anyone but myself). My mother used to tease me by saying I’d change my mind when I was older, but I never once wavered. My biological clock is smashed to smithereens, if I ever even got one at the factory.
Spouse is fine with no kids, btw. We like our lifestyle, neither of us really wants to grow up and be responsible for another little human, so we’re quite compatible on that front.
Way back in the '90s I used to subscribe to one of those childfree newsgroups on Usenet, but I came to realize the same thing someone else said in another thread here: all they did was talk about kids and how much they hated them. I don’t hate kids–I just don’t want any of my own. And I realized that I didn’t really want to be a member of a group that spent all its time talking about something I had no interest in.
College-educated professional. Raised mormon, but now atheist. Yes, I have a social life, hobbies and pets. I’m 43.
I am the youngest of 7 children so I was the go-to babysitter for all of my siblings for years. I also had a thriving babysitting business as a teenager; mormons like to make a lot of babies and they are always looking for sitters. I also worked in the children’s department at the public library in high school. I was around kids a lot. I’m actually quite good with them, but most of my adult friends are unaware of this and act like I’m terrified to hold the baby, or as if I don’t know how to handle infants, toddlers, school-age kids, etc. I have experience with all the above, as well as special needs kids, but I never say this out loud lest I be placed in the position of watching somebody’s kid “for just a minute.” (Right. Heard that one before.)
Somewhere around 15 or 16, I decided that children are damned hard work and most (if not all) of the moms I knew/know looked and appeared to be miserable. Most people won’t cop to it, but it seems like motherhood sucks, even if you have a really great partner and/or support system. Every time I hear someone complaining about being a mom, I start asking questions to look for the positives. If there are any, nobody’s been able to articulate it clearly to me. Looks like a whole lotta work, time, money, worry, and effort for little to no reward.
I think it doesn’t look like much fun to me because I don’t want it. It looks like torturous hell though. I’ve never met anyone with more than one kid under eighteen who said to me, “I just love being a mom; it’s so much fun! Totally worth it and here’s why:” Most people roll their eyes and plot and scheme how awesome their lives will become when their children finally grow up and move out of the house. This is not a stellar endorsement of parenthood, despite what parents may think.