He’s right, though. My “cultured, hot” Englishman would not have me leaping out of bed. I guess the English butler would work provided he sounded really old.
It can’t be a woman’s voice for me. I’d get all irritated. I don’t like that many women to start with, I’m not inviting one into my house!
I’ve been thinking and thinking of a happy medium and haven’t come up with one yet.
“House, I need to take a dump.”
“I’ll alert the media.”
I’m sorely tempted to have Eddie, The Shipboard Computer from The Hitch-Hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy, but that way lies madness, I suspect. 
If you’re in a cynical or devious mood, then I don’t think you can do better than Edmund Blackadder (You’d have a house so cunning it would be appointed Chair of Cunning at Oxford University!), possibly with a little Stewie Griffin thrown in for good measure.
It goes without saying that people who displeased me would find their houses re-wired to sound like Marvin, The Paranoid Android. 
Most of the time I’d probably default to either Holly (the Norman Lovett version), though. With a generic Hot English Female voice as a back-up, but I can’t think of anyone specific at the moment. 
Hard to go wrong with Stephen Fry at his usual Jeevesian pitch of perfection. I could think of plenty of women with sexy voices (Keira Knightley, Anne Archer, Geena Davis, Liv Tyler, Nichelle Nichols “back in the day,” the lady who does the Fifth Third Bank radio ads, etc.) but that would just be too damned distracting around the house.
Damn it. You know how sometimes you open a thread and have the perfect answer and scroll though a page and a half to make sure no one else has posted it and…?
Curse you!
My all-time favorite voice. I have to stop and watch anything he narrates. Last week it was the PBS program on the Mormons. I could listen to him talk about sewage – and did, twice, which he narrated the program about the city of Chicago. He could definitely make “Your toilet is overflowing” sound good.
How about R. Lee Ermey:
MAGGOT I WANT THIS BATHROOM FLOOR SO CLEAN YOU CAN EAT OFF IT OR BY GOD YOU WILL! DO I MAKE MY SELF CLEAR?!?
Oswald Mendez, of Oswald and Danny (Team Cha-cha-cha) on the Amazing Race.
I can just hear it now: “Come, darling! Let us read together the mail.”
Although I’d probably have the same problem as CairoCarol…
Basil Rathbone. (An obscure reference.)
But seriously, Morgan Freeman.
John Corbett or Mike Rowe could talk me into just about anything. Or Sam Elliott. Any one of 'em.
Jessica Alba or Keira Knightley. Just … because.
Christopher Walken. No-one could do a better job of making even the mundane sound important.
The Whisper voice from Apple’s voice recognition system (lain).
dogbutler beat me to R. Lee Ermey. Now that would be a clean house.
David Attenborough is probably who I’d actually go with though.
“Observe the subject diligently typing his opinions on a message board. While our pale friend attempts to make a space for himself in the virtual hierarchy of the internet, others of his species are roaming the California countryside, attempting to find mates in an intricate dance as old as life itself…”
Exactly.
Although I think it might cause problems when it’s time to clean the bathroom.
Morgan Freeman for the living room, Alton Brown for the kitchen, Billy Boyd for the bedroom (prrrrr) and a generic voice for the bathroom. Don’t want to feel like someone’s watching me.
Dunno about the voice (though I love the Oswald suggestion), but I know who the arm for my Robot House can be.
What no Emeril
BAM!
You gonna season that, or does your cauliflower come pre seasoned?
Yes! My first thought before I even read the replies. I’d never, ever leave the house.
I could listen to that man read laundry lists.