This is the most depressing thing I’ve read in this thread and possibly on The Dope in a very long time. IMHO it is also the antithesis of what this thread is about. For about a bazillion different reasons, people catch another person’s eye or not. And people fall in lust or love or not.
Women who are very slender or “bones” as you’ve said deal with plenty of body issues, just as women of all shapes and sizes do. Because a woman is very slender or very “boney” doesn’t mean they attract or deserve men who are Dogs.
ETA: I read your remarks up there, anomalous1, and respect your sincerity. I’m gonna let this post stay, because I felt it was an honest response, but I am grateful for the clarification !!
Ya I think that unless she is morbidly obese, or has that weird sweaty smell, then there’s no reason to feel ashamed. As most have pointed out, we’re definitely conditioned in our “lusting.” In the 90s it was skiiinnnny as hell women like Courtney Cox. Now it’s totally different.
Honestly, not all men would be ashamed of you. Also, there is something deeply sadly wrong with anybody who would try to get you to believe that. He should be ashamed of his own damn self. I hope your next experiences are fantastic.
Something I have really disliked about myself is the weakness I have had as a man when it comes to selecting women based on appearance. Not even the appearance I am most attracted to but the appearance I think society judges us on. If I could do anything over in life it would be to go back and date all the girls I really liked who may not have had the physical appearance I thought I was expected to show up with. I was aware of this as young as 15 years old but was too weak to change.
Just my humble two cents…
If a guy is ashamed of their attraction to a thick lady, then they are most likely immature and insecure about themselves as well. When I was a teenager, aka VERY immature, I would never admit any attraction out of the ‘norm’ of what my circle of friends thought, because…I have no idea anymore… As I matured, I realized that I should follow what made ME happy. I eventually realized that looks are fleeting (on both sides of the gender spectrum) and my idea of what is attractive should really center around the person as a whole, how they carried themselves, how they made me feel etc. My wife is “thick”, I don’t care and never will. She is comfortable with herself; loves me and I love her, nothing else matters.
On a similar note, I have observed that it’s not that some men don’t act on that attraction, it’s that they go out with this woman and etc and then treat her badly. And that’s okay because, as was explained to me, “you just fuck fat girls.”
Then again, I also am horrified at women who refuse to see men who don’t fit some kind of Hollywood image of perfection. “I wouldn’t go out with him, he’s shorter than I am,” or “I wouldn’t date a man who has a blue collar job.” A few years back a guy I knew (a really nice guy, too, genuinely good guy, had a lot going for him) wanted to date a friend of mine and when approached on the subject she said, “He’s so short I could eat peanuts off the top of his head! What would I want with someone like that?” And she literally laughed at the prospect. “I would never go out with someone like that.”
