Are you sure? 21 phallic objects dripping goo from the tip - how could any convent school girl resist?
(PS: If you need me, I’ll be in the armoury - looking for a titanium jockstrap… 
)
xeno,
Apparently, since all five women you know have done this, you need to start finding a set of female friends who shares your values.
What, in your mind, makes a slut? Is this three partners in a year? Three in a week? Three in year might be the case where, like you, she thought she was in love with and going to marry each of these gentlemen - but it didn’t work out. Three in a week shows more interest in getting laid than a relationship, but even then some women are of the belief that if they don’t “put out” they won’t get called back.
I’ll assure you that not all women are like this, just like all men are just not out to get laid. However, there are enough men out there just looking to get laid that most 21 year old women who aren’t actually physically hideous, can get laid - they ain’t doing it by themselves. And that, from the wails of the “I can’t get laid” male crowd, there actually seems to be somewhat of a shortage of such women.
They are probably just old enough and experienced enough to have confidence about the whole scene; that plus the additional distance from their parents that may have arisen during the last few years makes it a pretty good time to take the old sexuality for a test drive.
My personal inclination (to my surprise, I might add) turned out to be “sex within relationships only”. But people who go around saying everyone ought to be that way about their sexuality irritate the hell out of me. If I had found that I liked to spend each day picking out a different cute and receptive female and bedding her by nightfall – or going to a club and doing a couple hundred people a night in the orgy room, for that matter – that’s OK too. If not, why not?
And yes, you should definitely examine your attitudes to see if you hold females to a different standard than males. If my niece or my aunt or my sister discover that for them it’s a lot of fun trying out every different male body shape they’ve ever noticed to see which ones sex best, I wish them good luck and good scoring.
It’s risky, sure, but so is skydiving.
xenothrope, since you still seem a bit confused on this point, if your stated motivations are true and you didn’t want to be flamed or called a troll your OP should have read something like “Some of my female friends (all 21 years old) have recently started to behave in a way that I can only call ‘slutty’. They frequently have sex with men they’ve just met. I’m concerned that this behavior will lead to negative consequences for them, such as abuse, unwanted pregnancy, STDs, bad reputations, and low self-esteem, and would like suggestions as to how I might help my friends avoid these problems.”
Can you see the difference between that and the things you have actually posted?
Uh, no you don’t, Phil Donahue.
Have a friend/relative die of AIDS, is a totally different ball of wax to having a friend/relative die of cancer.
There’s no stigma with cancer.
No one secretly believes that if you have cancer, you deserved to get it.
People don’t mind eating after someone with cancer.
People aren’t shuned by their friends and social crown for having cancer.
You are an immature little boy.
I suggest, if you want to “help” your friends, you could say “Gee Suzie - I notice that you boffed the whole football team last night. I probably don’t need to tell you this, as you are a grown woman; however, just in case, here is some contact information for Planned Parenthood. They can give you some info about STD’s and pregnancy prevention and whatnot, just in case you need it. K?”
and keep your grandiose moralizing to yourself. Monogamy works for you? Great. But you have absolutely no right to project your own moral values on to your “friends”.
And, just for future reference, you really aren’t going to make many more female friends if you insist on refering to ANY women as “Sluts”. Just FYI.
I dunno. Why do men?
Men don’t turn into sluts at 21. It’s more like… 17.
Xenothrope just can’t get any, I think that’s his problem.
Send me some of those voracious horn dogs xenothrope…actually I was wondering what part of the world you are in, as you location field is blank.,
What a great way to welcome someone to the boards, guys. Fantastic.
Lay off the guy already. He’s a young man, trying to make sense of some significant changes in his social circle. He doesn’t claim to know it all, he’s looking for some explanations. It doesn’t help to bash him for making a generalisation, and it certainly doesn’t help when you’re looking for offence in all of his words, which is exactly what some of you seem to be doing.
Welcome aboard, ** xenothrope** - let’s hope our residents will be a little more hospitable from now on.
Well, if the premise of the OP was correct, I would have been a lot more popular in college.
That being said, women’s libido’s tend to have a totally different timeline from men’s, peaking at 35 instead of 18 if you believe the studies.
Personally, my sex drive took a huge leap after I actually became sexually active, and many of my friends reported similar changes after they began having satifying sex. Some of them had been sexually active for years, but didn’t become “voracious horn dogs” until they started actually having orgasms. (None of us were any more voracious than our boyfriends, but I’m not going to get into why men are such sluts at that age.)
BTW xenothrope, this is not your typical message board. If you can’t produce posts that are clear, coherent, and reasonably free of spelling and punctuation errors, you are in deep, deep excrement. Even if you don’t get eaten alive for overtaxing the hamster with incoherent drivel, no one will take you at all seriously, because you don’t present yourself seriously.
I sent you an email, xenothrope. Don’t worry, it was a nice one.
I don’t mean to offend the OP, anymore than he inteded to be a troll, bout pleas let me make this analogy:
If I find hip-hop culture annoying intrusive and an insult to intelligence, what if I OP’d “Why do African Americans have to act like such niggers?”
After Columbine, when bullying was, all to briefly, adresses as a topic of national concern, “The Stanger” columnist Dan Savage noted that in American High Schools, any non-athletic boy is labeled a “faggot” and every working-class girl a “slut.”
This was absolutely true when I was in school. Also, people referred to Blacks as “niggers” with no more shame than a horse shows when breaking wind.
What I’m trying to say is that “slut,” like “faggot,” and “nigger” is a slur, used only to hurt people. It sheds more darkenss than light, and has no place in a discussion of the issues of reckless promiscuity vs sexual self-determiniation.
Just my $.02. Thank you for your time.
I’ll second what Coldy said… since that is pretty much my feeling on this little trainwreck too.
Uhhh … can you introduce me to some of 'em?
Seems like part of the “Curse of elmwood” is that many women I meet are “reformed sluts.” Of course, they reformed just a few months before I met them, and now they’re fundamentalist Christians, JWs, or practice some other faith where sex is a no-no until marriage. Sigh …
Xenothrope,
Respectfully, WHO ARE THESE WOMEN?, DO YOU HAVE ANY PHONE NUMBERS?.
unclviny
I am surprised at what Crazy Cat Lady said because when I became sexually active (finally) my libidio just disappeared overnight-unfortunately because sex with bf is just very boring. And as he is the only man I have ever have sex with (and with my poor social skills, will probably be the only man I will ever have sex with), I am afraid I just can’t fantasise about sex anymore because I now know how boring and overrated it is.
All that happens is that I lie there, bored, desperately wanting it to be over so I can go to sleep. I have never had an orgasm with him and probably never will. I find it hard to believe that women actually find sex fun, because when we do it, only one person is having fun, and it isn’t me. He won’t do cunnilingus because he doesn’t like it, he comes after about 30 seconds every time, I would rather not have sex with him at all because it is so bad.
It was a much more satisfying sex life when it was just me, my fingers and my imagination. And because now all I can think of is just how boring sex is, that has pretty much destroyed that.
It is just my luck, that after 29 years of enforced celibacy, I finally get a boyfriend, and he is crap in bed. Wonderful!
I’m just venting here, because it makes me sad. I really do care about him and I want to be with him, it is just that the physical side of our relationship is a real problem, I will just have to do without good sex I guess.
So anyway, crazy cat lady is wrong. Becoming sexually active has completely destroyed my sex drive.
And FWIW, I think most of you are being a bit too hard on the OP, his offence is inarticulacy, he isn’t evil. (and this is coming from a woman way over 21!)
Coldfire, I hear what you are saying and I don’t like the concept of “bashing” anyone either. But there have been many posts that were critical but not bashing.
Xeno, I hope that you can look at some of the responses – the ones that you really didn’t want to hear – to see what you can learn from them. Use the criticism as a learning tool.
I think that it is completely understandable that you are concerned for the health of your friends who are having unprotected sex. I can understand your expressing your concern for their health – once. Then you have to let it go if you want to live a psychologically healthy life yourself. You really can’t “fix” them. And you don’t really want to develop a controlling personality, do you?
If you are having concerns about their morals, be a real friend and consider choosing not to pass judgment.
It is not at all unnatural for a woman of twenty-one to have strong sexual feelings. It is probably becoming more and more common for women to act on those feelings without being involved emotionally. I’m an old woman and have no business passing judgment on how anyone – much less a younger generation – conducts her or his sex life, assuming that it is not deliberately hurtful of others.
I was quite “virtuous” for a very long time and I’m glad that I chose to follow that particular path. But I can tell you honestly that some of my most sterling memories are of certain lovers that I had before I married the first time at age thirty. “Ah, yes! I remember it well.” 
Welcome to SDMB! I look forward to more of your threads and comments, even though I suspect that we will disagree from time to time.
Infectious Lass, can you educate him? If he isn’t interested in learning to give you pleasure too, what does that tell you? I don’t know your age, but what may be tolerable in a mate at twenty may be intolerable when you are forty.
infectious lass, i’m so sorry 
i really hope that some good communication and hard work can help the physical side of your relationship. because you obviously love each other enough to make the other facets succeed.
it really can get better than what you experience at the moment.
and not necessarily by changing partners.
don’t accept the things you CAN change.