Why don't you clean up your ass instead, bitch?

I hate to be this way, but…

I have sympathy for someone who has a neighbor that’s making the neighborhood look dirty. While the picture of the porch doesn’t make it look like some slum, you have stated in other threads about your personal issues with keeping things clean, all of your different types of roaches, etc. Having a neighbor who is making things look nasty can be hard, especially in terms of property value and just being able to look around your neighborhood with pride.

Having said that, I know it can also be hard to figure out how to deal with that kind of problem. She sure was bitchy, but maybe she didn’t know how to approach you about it. Maybe she’s listing her house for sale, or expecting out of town guests. This may just be a matter of badly handling a neighbor issue.

She is complaining about THAT? Seriously, she has serious mental problems. Or she may just be having a shitty morning and taking it out on you.

Cute house!

Okay, I must admit that if I saw a porch in that state for more than a couple of days I would wonder to myself what the heck was up with that BUT under no circumstances would I say anything about it. That bitch is waaaaaay over the freakin’ line. I hope you don’t have to encounter her again, but if you do at least you’ll know what you’re dealing with and can mentally prep yourself accordingly.
By the way, where’s the picture of Captain?:confused::slight_smile:

I pictured much worse. She’s a socially-retarded harpy.

I’d also have been caught off guard by her effrontery—but the response to her question, à l’esprit de l’escalier, should’ve been a puzzled stare and “I’m sorry, do we *know *each other?”

Thankfully, people where I live would never behave in such a manner. Instead they’d complain to the homeowner’s association who’d issue a vaguely threatening letter, leaving you to forever wonder which of your friendly neighbors is the dirty rat.

Your house is lovely, by the way.

Ah, one of those people who thinks of the correct thing to say long after the event has passed. A simple “Go fuck yourself” will always suffice.

General question: why is “cuntlapper” an insult? Don’t we approve of cunnilingus anymore?

She had a very minor point, but still that was being damn damn rude. I’d kept those things on the porch for months after that to piss her off. Want something to complain about, I’ll give you something to complain about.

We had a friend that was getting complaints about stuff on their porch. Stuff like some bricks and construction materials. Thing was, you couldnt even SEE the stuff till you GOT to the front door. Nothing could be seen from the street. Apparently the mere presence of the stuff gave off bad vibes that lowered the neighborhood value.

And in the what the hell did they just say? department.

I was driving the 7 miles or so to the local hardware store a few years ago. No AC, so the windows were down in the car. Some random stranger on a bike on the other side of the road going the opposite direction yells out “Why don’t you ride a bike rather than drive a car !?”

The fact that I was going to go pick up well over a 1000 lbs of concrete might have had something to do with it.

No. Lovely house, BTW.

Sateryn, the roaches were indubitably from the neighbors who got foreclosed upon. (yeah, and she was worried about US?) They were a completely different species and everything. Thr “normal” roaches are unavoidable in South Carolina houses.

Yes, I’ve done a lot of threads about having trouble with cleaning. That’s why I have a yard guy - so the neighbors don’t get upset. :slight_smile: The mess, while so overwhelming I am posting to this via iPhone rather than work on it, is inside.

Given the items that offended her, boxmuncher would have been the perfect word choice IMO.

It isn’t about oral sex, it is because her vagina is so big you can run laps around the inside of it. Or so I assume.

Ahh… I wasn’t thinking of that interpretation. That certainly makes more sense. I always assumed it meant like a dog lapping at a water dish… Carry on.

Hey, I agree I should have had it hauled around months ago - it’s kind of been one of those “well, the trash won’t be here until next Tuesday, so I should do it on Monday” but then I forget on Monday sort of things. But I’ve never said it didn’t need doing.

And how about a twofer? They’re so embarrassed when they get caught not hating each others’ guts.

Oooooh, goggie and kitteh goodness!

They don’t normally snuggle, but the opportunity to both get scritches on Mama’s lap was just too much for them. Note the wary detente.

That…is…awesome!

Thanks for the lolz!!!

Don’t you hate it when someone’s bossy presumption causes you to be obnoxious just to be contrary?

I was once looking for parking in a very busy beach parking lot. No spaces were available, but the parking lot attendants pointed over to a chained-off area, indicating they were going to undo the chain and free up some more space. Several cars, including me, drove towards that area. The attendants were delayed a bit trying to find the key, and there was a small traffic jam waiting for them. I was about to turn off my idling engine while I waited, when a squealy, overly-politically-correct girl standing nearby with her friends, said “Excuse me, would you please like save the planet and turn off your car, already?” and went back to giggling with her gaggle. Like I said, I was about to turn it off anyway, but she pissed me off so much that I left it on out of pure spite. She tried to catch my attention again to point out my transgression, but I pointedly looked the other way. I’m not proud of my childish contrariness, but damn.

Don’t cut off your nose to spite your face. She was rude. Your front porch is a mess.

I would have put it into park and then rested my foot gently on the gas, so as to run the engine at an audibly higher rev. You know how it is - there’s no point in making a point if they don’t get the point.