I can just about imagine one or two current or former single expat ladies here having steam shoot out their ears in full Donald Duck mode right now.
Why would we do that? It’s not exactly a secret. Expat guys with an eye for laowei women are in short supply, and their services are generally much appreciated by the ladies. My friends used to share reviews and helpful tips on their favorite expat hookup partners. You might hear “Oh, headed to Chongqing? Go find Mark, it’s a good time, and he’ll cook you breakfast in the morning.”
Odd dynamic.
Bwahahahahahahaha
Mark, is that you?
Unfortunately not. He had the best job in the world. Truly my hero.
What the Bkk Post did to him was disgraceful, and it also deprived me of my weekly highlight.
My Asian female friends would be just as amused (and mildly disgusted) by many of the ignorant remarks made in this thread as I am.
Perhaps your friends and family did not like that particular Asian woman that you married. Or perhaps they are racist. But I wouldn’t assume behaviors from a group of family and friends applies to society as a whole.
I am far from resenting Asian women; I wouldn’t wish to inflict upon them any of the misogeny I see in some of the male behaviors inherent in the opinions expressed here.
What is it you consider misogynist?
Several of the posts have been of the form “Maybe they think you think Asian women are submissive” which is just speculating about possible racism. I think such speculation is mildly racist in itself, but still, that isn’t misogyny.
Is it the guys talking about physical features they do / do not like in women? Would it be misandry if women, or homosexual men, were to talk about physical features they like in guys?
I should have added, to simple homer, that I wasn’t really referring to his post when I made the comments about misogyny. There was really nothing at all offensive about his post, just the last one I glommed onto for my comments. I was a little put off by the thread in general. Not picking out people or naming names (I literally couldn’t anyway; I pay attention to what is said, not who is saying it).
I get that weight/facial features, and our preferences around them, are pretty much hard-wired into us. I have a physical “type” too. But what I’m reading in this thread … seems to go at times beyond “I have this preference” and more into “I think fat women are gross” as well as lengthy descriptions of specific body types and what’s more prevelant by ethnicity. It’s not something I can say, with 100% certainty, points to a dislike for women as an underlying theme.
I will just say, while I prefer my men slim and tall and I love dark hair & eyes, I find nothing at all wrong with short, chubby, balding men with pasty complexions. They probably wouldn’t catch my eye in terms of finding them attractive TO ME, but damn, there’s a port for every storm 
A fish for every sea. A shoe for every foot. A … well, ok. I think I’ve scrambled enough metaphors together. Just saying, I like men. A lot. Wouldn’t waste a second of my time thinking of what type is more sexually attractive to the general population. Well, except the half hour of my life I’ll never get back for participating in this thread, anyway :smack:
This is such an interesting post; if a Man says that he is just not attractive to Obese women (and in many cases, including mine, even Overweight women), he’s a Misogynist. But if you say “chubby, balding men with pasty complexions . . . probably would not catch [your] eye in terms of finding them attractive . . .” that’s fine. What a joke!
I absolutely agree with you re: “ports for every storm.” I merely stated some really obvious statistics, i.e., most men prefer thinner women to Obese/Overweight women, and I added that my taste falls right in line with that preference. Hence, I am a Misogynist? Ridiculous.
Nice straw man. Nobody said anything about preferences based on physical attraction being misogynist. Nobody.
But I don’t know what this has to do with Asians. I assume you date individuals, not some kind of ethnic collective Borg creature. Who cares what the average waist line of your lady’s ethnicity is? Either She is slim or she isn’t.
Traci does back off and say that she’s not saying 100% that the body type conversations construe misogynism; but she does seem very put off by it nonetheless, and she Did introduce Misognyism into this conversation.
Like it or not, thousands of western men would never “date” a western woman if they had the choice of an Asian woman instead. This is because western women have a reputation for being high maintenance, demanding and overly PC, and Asian women are not tarred with that particular brush ( correctly or not ).
I have many western women friends, but there is no way I would ever become romantically involved with any of them.
BTW, I include Asian ethnic women that grew up in a western country as being western. So for me, it’s not just physical appearance, but cultural as well. It does help though, that I find most East Asian women to be very attractive.
So, flame away, but it won’t change my opinion.
No flaming from me.
I am thrilled for you, and for my “western” sisters, that you’ve self-selected out of the dating pool. If you are able to find a companion with the traditional values that are also important to you, more power to you.
I am high- maintenance in that I demand respect and equality, and to your way of thinking probably quite overly-PC in that I think principles of respect and equality should be universal. I’m also the typically chunky American woman who prefers a good meal followed by a delicious slice of dessert heaven to dieting myself into a size 2. Fortunately, my husband does not mind the extra curves (in fact prefers them). So you and I have nothing in common and would make each other miserable. And we both know it. Kudos to you in knowing, and going for, what you want. And hope you’be found it. In today’s world of technology bringing us to within a fingertip of each other, I imagine that your dating pool of willingly submissive and eager-to-please in softly feminine and pleasing manner is going to be increasingly hard to find.
There you go, making personal attacks instead of debating the issues. I never said anything about size, so why bring that in?
In fact, my western ex was “chunky” and I was able to live with her for many years despite your opinion that size is an issue for me.
You also haven’t read all the replies pointing out that East Asian women are anything but “willingly submissive”, but in my experience they are indeed feminine and have a pleasing manner.
Also, you seem to have overlooked me stating that I have many western women friends, so how do you know that we don’t have anything in common and wouldn’t get on?
And, why on earth do you think I want a “dating pool”? Did I say anything about wanting more than one woman?
In footy parlance, you are playing the man and not the ball. By all means attack my opinions, but why attack what is an illusion?
PS. you obviously have no idea what "high maintenance means, nor what PC is about.
Doggo, I guess I’ve read too many posts in this thread from men who are breaking women down into the sum total of their body parts, and praising obsequiescent behaviors as pleasing to men. If this was not your opinion, then my assumptions were indeed lazy, and I apologize.
I know that what I said was a little stabby, but I sincerely did not mean it as an insult or attack. I can’t separate my distaste for what I view as objectifying behaviors from coloring the tone of what I say, but I do realize that the problem is mine, not yours. Consenting adults are and should be free to pursue that which makes them happy. You hardly need my permission or approval to live your life as you see fit.
Assuming you mean acquiescent, when did anyone say that in this thread? Furthermore, although some people did make several comments about what physical features turn them on, that is relevant to this discussion.
In itself it is not objectifying any more than discussing how much facial hair women like is objectifying men.
To the person who asked why I thought Asian men aren’t as successful as Asian women in experiencing the bounty of interracial dating, I think it’s primarily because they cannot hope to compete against white men(in general terms).
There are lots of reasons for it, (and more than a few outliers who smash through these stereotypes)
- They’re shorter than average,
- have to wade through a litany of charges about their penis size,
- fealty to their mothers and
- inability to grow any sort of scruff.
I don’t really know why these traits are unattractive on the whole, it’s just when it comes to this sort of attraction, asian culture translates very well with females and just fails flat with males.
OkCupid (one of the leading online dating sites) had a detailed breakdown a few years ago:
http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/your-race-affects-whether-people-write-you-back/
See, this is why I like having a Thai wife. I can lock her in the bathroom if she gets all uppity, and she even thanks me! Not at all like you high-maintenance broads.