The story is out there in quite a few major web sites. The damage is done. Posting a casual thread to discuss a new story doesn’t matter. You think I’m going to burn a newspaper because Joey P might get his precious feelings hurt? Hell no.
Don’t like this thread? Don’t read it! Simple. You’re the one that clicked that mouse. 1100 other people have read this posting. I care about them and not a handful of complainers.
Then they could have slipped the guy the note.
Why did they feel the need to post it online?
It’s like when I see a thing on the news about how a letter finally found it’s way to the recipient 50 years later or someone drove 300 miles to return a lady’s purse and everything was still there. My thought is always “How did the news find about about this” they didn’t find out because a good deed was done, they found out because someone was being someone called the news and said “I’m retuning a purse and not stealing anything” or the other party called and the person said “yup, I returned it, you can interview me”.
And I’m gobsmacked that there are supposedly intelligent people, even here on the Straight Dope Message Board, who seemingly cannot understand that actions deliberately done in public (a) have NO expectation of privacy, and (b) may have unpleasant consequences.
Where did I say my feelings got hurt. Why would I say my feelings got hurt? Please, don’t put words in my mouth.
Like hell I don’t.
I expect those same good manners that keep me from shoulder surfing someone else’s phone to keep others from surfing mine. That woman’s texts to her lover were nobody else’s goddamn business. Not the two girls’ behind them, not mine, and not yours.
You “care” about them? Give me a fucking break. You give zero shits about them. You just like posting scandalous titillating crap to get your jollies. You are an example of what is wrong on the Internet.
I didn’t before, either, but thanks to the general tenor of this thread, I now do: Stepping out of the role that others believe you should have, regardless of cause or consequence, is something that makes a lot of people very angry. If I had to guess, I’d say it’s connected to people’s desire for predictability and order, like it’s a “don’t rock the boat” sort of thing. Or maybe it’s just a scapegoating thing, conflating a proximate cause with something more distal.
My husband and I (of 27 years, just by the by), have an extremely loving, solid marriage. It also happens to be open and polyamorous. Both he and I have girlfriends and boyfriends, some of whom we share feeling of love with. It’s quite conceivable that we might be at a public event together and also texting/sexting other people. While it wouldn’t hurt our relationship, having our arrangement splattered all over the internet because of a couple of self-righteous busy bodies could hurt our other family relationships, friendships, or even our careers. What those nosy bitches did was decidedly not cool.
Things done in public have no expectation of privacy from government search and seizures, that’s for sure.
It’s not entirely clear to me that this kind of thing would not carry some possibility of liability of invasion of privacy.
There’s an action in the common law of privacy for publicizing embarrassing private facts. Regardless of what the people in the back row had seen on the person’s iPhone, the matter was not publicized until they posted it on the internet. That could theoretically give rise to this kind of tort claim.
“So many other people have acted with an utterly appalling lack of tact and simple decency, I guess I might as well do the same thing!”
I still would have raised that very real possibility. Why should the gender of the partner observed affect the likelihood that there’s been a non-standard deal worked out with regards to their sex life?
This general theory’s come up from many. I’m troubled by the fact that they were bothering to read someone else’s texts. It wasn’t until after they’d read them they knew the content. Sure data is exposed to shoulder surfers anytime we’re in public. It doesn’t mean I have to socially like or applaud people that could have easily read a conversation with someone who just found out they had cancer, or was having a hard time coping with the change of their meds for their mental health issue, or any number of things all of us deal with on a daily basis that we would prefer not be public knowledge.
The woman sending the sext MAY have been doing something socially reprehensible. The women reading her texts, IMO, were doing something socially reprehensible. The fact that they happened to catch someone else potentially being a vile asshat doesn’t change that their behavior marks them as vile asshats.
To add extra vileness they didn’t just address the issue privately by letting the husband know. They said “look at us” to the world. We don’t care if we’re potentially adding extra pain and embarrassment, look at us. :smack:
Applause. Nicely stated.
Bullshit. It’s out there on quite a few shitty gossip news sites, like your favorite The Daily Mail. It’s also now being discussed on a lot of message boards and the like, because, you know, people loves to be getting some “har har de har” internet voyeurism going on.
But, I live in fucking Atlanta, and was quite likely at that Braves-Dodgers game (I went to 2 of the 3 games, assuming this was the series that just wrapped up, and I had not heard of this until your thread.
I didn’t put a disclaimer in the OP that these lady’s shouldn’t be gloating. I thought it was pretty obvious to anybody they should have kept this good deed private. I congratulated the good deed. Not what came afterward.
One missing sentence made the difference. I know I have to qualify and issue blanket disclaimers for every post here.
here is your blanket disclaimer
These ladies blabbed on the Internet. Gloating and smirking. Very rude, naughty ladies. The content of this news report might be offensive to some.
Geez I hate CYA
What you call a good deed, others of us consider messing around in someone else’s private lives. These ladies don’t deserve any congratulations and should feel ashamed of not minding their own fucking business.
Helping someone is always going to be messing around with their private life.
Good to know that people will just ignore infidelity. Let the husband be the stupid sap. Never give the poor guy a heads up.
wonderful.
unless its the guy texting a hot blonde. drooling over her boobs and looking forward to the next date. Everybody would feel bad for the wife.
Nobody wants “help” from busybody stangers. If the guy’s wife is cheating on him, that’s between him and her. MYOFB and I’ll mind mine.
Okay, I can’t let this one go by. Listen up, you have no idea the consequences of interfering in anyone else’s life. So just don’t. You are not the goddamn moral police. Get that through your head.
If I seem a little overly fired up about this, here is why. My wife of over 20 years was unfaithful a few years back, and we are no longer together. You know how I found out? I fucking figured it out myself. I ABSOLUTELY would not want to have found out from some random stranger in the way this guy supposedly did. Jesus fucking christ.
If this woman is so stupid and blatant that she is really doing what the story says she is, guess what? She was going to be found out soon anyway. Now this poor guy not only has to deal with his wife’s infidelity, he has to deal with being the poster child of the helpless cuckolded husband.
Thanks a fucking lot, you two nosy ass bitches at the ball game.:smack::smack:
First of all, no it doesn’t. “Hey fella, need a job?” That’s helpful. “Excuse me young man, your shoelace is untied.” Helpful. “I’d suggest the pork ribs, they’re quite good tonight.” Helpful. “Hey world, John’s wife is having an affair, I think.” Not helpful.
Second of all, I was in the same situation as leftfield6, and I have the exact same position. I wonder if* anyone,* male or female, on the board who has been the victim of a cheating spouse, would have wanted to find out this way? I suspect not, which means these actions are hurting everyone involved, and would be hard to label “moral.”