How about Kumbaya…
where all the guys in the audience are holding hands and singing?
For some reason, the first song that popped into my head was Three Coins in a Fountain. :dubious:
And any song by the Counting Crows. Unless after the strip club you want to drive your car into a concrete wall, of course.
Hava Nagila
I think that Ludacris’ “The Hoe Song” would be a horrible song to strip to. It’s has a decent beat, but think about it. It would probably give the wrong impression.
Then I heard the Bill Withers classic,“Lean on Me”.
Yeah, thats the one.
That was my first thought…then I realized “here is my handle, here is my spout” might work somehow.
Then I started hating my brain.
I’m going with old Disney songs. Well, many old Disney songs.
I’m not sure whether ‘Ride of the Valkyries’ would be wildly inappropriate or curiously suitable. Sort of a grandiose, triumphant strip.
It is seriously disturbing that someone else would come up with The Ballad of the Green Berets. 
Any of the Gregorian Chants might be interesting.
Pictures of Lily by the Who would be singularly appropriate.
Well, I guess I should have checked this thread sooner.
Songs I’ve seen mentioned here that I’ve seen strippers dance to- “Papa Don’t Preach”, “Short Short Man” and “The Jack”.
I’ve danced to “The Chipmunk Song”- it was right around Christmas time, and the girls had to have one Christmas song in their set.
I’ve also danced to the short version of “Inna Gadda da Vida”.
Billy Idol’s “White Wedding” comes to mind as an inappropriate song- that I’ve danced to. I also used to dance to “Zombie Stomp” by Ozzy Osbourne.
When I was at the Lipstick Lounge, my last set of the night would consist of-
“Love Potion Number Nine”- the Coasters
“Gimme Dat Ting”- Wolfman Jack
“Spiders and Snakes”- whoever that was by
“Along Came Jones”- the Coasters again
“The Streak”- Ray Stevens
I was considered a bit strange by my coworkers.
Along those lines would be The Breakup Song by Ben Fold’s Five.
But then the lyrics, “Give me my money back, give me my money back, you bitch!” might be appropriate in some cases.
Or, maybe I’m a Believer as performed by The Monkees.
“Then I saw her [insert anatomical part], now I’m a believer!”
“Seventeen” by Winger
How about the theme from Jeopardy?
“Thank Heavens for Little Girls” would be rather creepy.
I am now officially torn between Take This Job and Shove It, and How Much is That Doggie in the Window?
And I may be the only one who finds the idea of Barney stripping to the tune of “I Love You, You Love Me/This Old Man” to be strangely erotic. I hope I am the only one, that is.
Regards,
Shodan
All of MJ, IMO. He has fast beats, and even mildly racy lyrics, but a woman moonwalking while disrobing is unsexy.
"Next up - for your holiday enjoyment, Theo Logica and her unique rendition of Christmas Shoes!" (Wild applause)
Regards,
Shodan
“She’s too fat for me” or any other polka music. (As opposed to poke-her music :D)
I remember some ladies doing rather well with MJ music. The era between the Jackson 5 and Thriller. Songs like: Don’t Stop 'Til You Get Enough, Rock With You, Working Day and Night, Dancing Machine, etc. But yeah, most of his newer stuff just wouldn’t work.
“A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When The Stripper Is Crying”, Boodhound Gang
I dunno. Might work.
(thinking about Madelyn Kahn in feathered lingerie, coming her hair and singing as she prepares for bed)
“Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord.”
RRrrrroooowww!
Two songs that popped into my head almost immediately are: “They’re Coming to Take Me Away”, and "Funeral March of a Marionette[the Alfred Hitchcock Show theme] And for the incredibly sick, twisted and demented, drumroll, please “Mother”. From which I quote a few lines:
M is for the many things she gave me,
O means that she only growing old
T is for the tears she shed to save me… :eek:
[can’t go on, bile rising, nausea imminent, projectile vomiting loaded and at the ready…]
Alice’s Restaurant - I’ve getting excited just thinking about that one.
Marry the Man Today from Guys and Dolls - Not only patently undanceable, but expressing a sentiment that would probably drive away most of the customers.
Father and Daughter by Paul Simon - Electra complex, anybody?
Tom Dooley - or just about any other song by The Kingston Trio.
Sink the Bismarck by Johnny Horton - Yes, there’re several references to “going down”, but they’re not supposed to be sexy.